By Any Means Necessary.
Part 9
The day’s meetings had
mentally worn him out and Elrohir slowly rose from behind his father’s desk.
The advisors had finally left and he now faced
an empty room, wishing his father were still here, for then he wouldn’t have to
face his feelings by himself.
He walked over to the
window to look outside and caught sight of his twin. Elladan had just
dismounted. That meant his brother had been inspecting the outer borders,
whilst he had been stuck in his father’s study. As if feeling his stare,
Elladan looked up and Elrohir shrank away from the window, unwilling to meet
his brother’s gaze. Before turning away he caught Elladan’s disapproving
expression at seeing him pull away, but his heart was breaking at seeing the
one person he loved but could never have.
Elrohir returned to the
desk and sat down again, putting another piece of paper in front of him. After
dipping the quill in the ink, he tried to write down his worries and fears.
[Elladan knows something
is wrong. I can see it in the way he looks at me. I feel it when he is close.
He knows something is bothering me and he feels frustrated because he cannot
make me confide in him. But that is something I cannot do. The moment I tell
him that I love him in that way, he will turn away from me in disgust. And even
if he should answer my feelings, I could not allow it. A love like this between
brothers is forbidden. I cannot drag him into disgrace with me.
I caught the first signs
of the Elven sickness today. My hands were shaky and I felt dizzy. My stomach
was tense and had I eaten breakfast I would have found myself being sick. It is
only a matter of time now.
Nana traveled to the
Undying Lands to stop herself from fading. It
was months before she began to fade. She lasted almost a year before she had to
depart. Will I have the same amount of time? Or I will fade more slowly? Or
faster?
Aiya, Elladan. Just
thinking about leaving you behind makes my heart ache, but it is the only way.]
Laying his quill down on
the desk, he stared at his words. His head slumped forwards in defeat, folding
the parchment and slipping it into his sleeve. Maybe he should gather
everything he had ever written and give it to Elladan to read after he had
faded? Maybe then his brother would understand what had happened and why?
Elrohir raised his right
hand and rubbed his brow. Lately he was experiencing headaches, something that
had never happened before. He suspected it was the grief that was causing them;
tormenting him in this way. There was only one way to ease them, but he refused
to give in to his weakness.
“Elrohir?” Elladan
frowned, seeing the pallor that had settled over his twin’s face. Elrohir
looked like he was feeling miserable and his heart went out to his suffering
brother. He covered the distance between them with a few steps and sat on his
heels next to his twin, gathering one of Elrohir’s hands in his. “You look
tired.”
Elrohir startled, suddenly
finding his brother this close. His hand twitched inside his twin’s and,
although he desperately craved his brother’s touch, he pulled it away.
Elladan’s shocked expression made him wince and he hated himself for adding to
his brother’s worry, but he couldn’t allow the touch as it fed his hopes and
desires. He had to distance himself.
Elladan’s eyes darkened
dangerously and he reached out again. This time he claimed his brother’s hand
forcefully, holding on tight. “Why do you shun my touch?” He had tried being
subtle in the past and it hadn’t worked.
Elrohir sighed deeply,
feeling miserable for worrying his older brother. “’Tis nothing.”
“I do not believe you, pen-dínen.” (Silent
one.) Elladan got to his feet and pulled Elrohir along until they stood, face
to face. “Talk to me.”
But
Elrohir slowly shook his head. “I cannot.”
“Cannot
or will not?” Elladan was beginning to lose his patience. Elrohir’s
stubbornness had frustrated him in the past, but this time it actually caused
him to worry for his brother’s well-being. Acting on impulse, he released
Elrohir’s hand and caught the relieved sigh his brother released. His frown
deepened at hearing that sigh, and he determinedly wrapped his arms around his
brother’s waist and pulled him close.
“Rest
against me.” But Elrohir tensed against him and even tried to pull away. “Nay,
I won’t let you.” He wouldn’t have any of that. “I am not letting go before you
tell me what ails you.” Elladan tried to capture his brother’s gaze, but
Elrohir unexpectedly rested his head against his shoulder, denying him eye
contact. “I want to help you. We are twins, Elrohir. When you hurt, I hurt.”
Elrohir
fought back the tears that were building in his eyes and reckoned it was a good
thing that Elladan couldn’t see them. /Aiya, êl, (star) you will hurt even more
when you find out I desire you. I have to take this secret into the grave with
me. You can never know./
Now
that Elrohir remained quiet Elladan felt powerless, even helpless. “Why won’t
you confide in me? We have never kept things from one another.”
Suddenly,
Elrohir slumped against him and he tightened his hold on his brother, quickly,
half-carrying, half-dragging his twin over to the couch in the corner where he
laid him down.
Kneeling
next to the couch, he finally realized what had happened; Elrohir had fainted
in his arms. Stunned, he stared at his brother’s pale face. “What is ailing you
and why won’t you tell me?” His heart thundered in his chest and it began to
show small cracks now that his twin was distancing himself. “Why is
Tears
appeared in his eyes and he allowed for them to slide down his face. “I do not
want to lose you, Elrohir. Don’t you understand that by losing you I would lose
myself?”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Glorfindel’s instincts
warned him that trouble lay ahead of them. He couldn’t really explain the
foreboding, but he listened to it nonetheless. Addressing his men, he ordered
them to remain close to Elrond at all times. The half-Elf gave him a curious glance,
but Glorfindel only shrugged his shoulders in mute reply.
Elrond assumed that
something troubled his seneschal and now that he focused his mind, he felt it
as well. Something dark and evil was advancing on them. “We have reached
Mirkwood,” he mused aloud, addressing the
Nodding his head,
Glorfindel confirmed the half-Elf’s suspicions. “I feel it too. Let us hope the
spiders haven’t noticed our presence. I have fought them once before and have no
desire to face them ever again.” Once, on a mission for Elrond, he’d had to
deliver a message to Thranduil. He had barely escaped when the black, hairy
monsters had targeted him.
Elrond shared the blond’s
concern. Rubbing a fingertip over Vilya, he hoped the ring emanated enough
power to keep them safe. He noticed that Glorfindel remained close and the
“’Tis near,” whispered
Glorfindel worriedly. Drawing his sword as well, he now felt the danger more
clearly, causing him to grow tense. Addressing one guard, he ordered the Elf to
remain close to Elrond and never stray from the half-Elf’s side. The guard
nodded and took up position close to the ruler of Imladris.
Reaching for his own
sword, Elrond felt grateful that he had decided to arm himself before leaving
Imladris. He trusted Glorfindel to keep him safe, but he also wanted to be able
to defend himself and fight in case of an attack.
Suddenly a deafening
shriek echoed through the woods. Several Elves raised their swords and others
slipped arrows into their hands. There was one Elf who charged at once, seeing
three hairy spiders emerge from the woods; Glorfindel.
Looking over his shoulder,
Glorfindel called out, “Head for Thranduil’s talan!” He would make sure the
monsters didn’t chase after Elrond when the half-Elf fled.
But fleeing was the last
thing on Elrond’s mind.
Glorfindel reached the
first spider and aimed for its legs, hoping to bring it down and immobilize it.
Glancing at the party behind him, he cursed, finding that Elrond was leading
the guards when they attacked. “I told you to head for Thranduil’s talan!”
Elrond was too busy
dodging a hairy leg and ignored Glorfindel’s indignant cry for now. “Charge!”
His men acted at once, hearing and obeying their Lord’s command.
Cursing loudly – and not
caring who heard him – Glorfindel tried to bring down the first spider. Damn
Elrond for not obeying his orders! All he wanted was for the half-Elf to be
safe and then Elrond had to do something stupid like joining them in this
fight! Didn’t the half-Elf know that he was too valuable to lose in this way?
Elrond’s curses joined
Glorfindel’s as the half-Elf realized that they were up against formidable
foes. The three spiders moved quickly, their fangs and hooked barbs flashing
dangerously.
“Look out!” Glorfindel
screamed his warning, but it came too late. He could only watch in shock at the
spider’s furious attack. The monster lifted one hairy leg, aiming the barbed
hooks at the half-Elf’s back.
Elrond’s eyes widened
impossibly and his movement froze when the hooks buried themselves in his side.
He had underestimated the speed and agility of the spider, and was now paying a
heavy price. Agony swept through him as the spider lifted its leg again; this
time with the half-Elf's immobile body attached to it. He screamed in pain as
he was lifted out of his saddle. The hooks drove themselves deeper into his
body and suddenly jagged fangs bit down into his
right shoulder. An icy cold seeped through Elrond as the spider released its
poison. Seeking out Glorfindel with his eyes, he could only yelp in agony.
Enraged, Glorfindel
charged. The guards followed their seneschal and all tried to bring the spider
down in an effort to free their Lord.
Glorfindel gave in to the
rage that had been building in his body and he managed to cut off the leg that was
holding Elrond. The half-Elf tumbled into his arms and the
But the spiders didn’t
grant him the luxury of dwelling on their love as the monsters attacked again,
enraged at losing their prey. Glorfindel gritted his teeth upon seeing Elrond’s
eyes grow vacant. The poison was strong enough to do serious damage and he had
to get his charge out of danger.
Grabbing hold of the reins
of one guard’s horse, he thrust Elrond into the startled Elf’s arms. “Take him
to Thranduil. Maybe the King can help him!” Time was of the essence and he
swatted the horse’s backside. The mare broke out into a gallop.
Wishing he could have been
the one to stay with his lover, Glorfindel growled, focusing on the monsters
once more. One of the spiders was breaking away from the group, trying to
follow Elrond. Glorfindel knew he had to prevent that from happening at all
costs. Raising his sword to encourage his men, he released a battle cry and
charged again, determined to kill all three spiders.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Lindir?” Erestor was very
much aware of the troubled look the white-haired Elf was giving him. Lindir had
been pacing Thranduil’s antechamber, hoping to be granted an opportunity to
talk to him. He could tell the other Elf was worried and Erestor felt slightly
guilty for not having set Lindir’s mind at ease sooner.
“My Lord, is everything
well? I grew worried when you did not return to our talan. You have now been
away for three nights.” Lindir studied the chief advisor and caught a slight
blush on the troubled features. What was going on here?
“I should have talked to
you earlier,” said Erestor, sitting down on a chair. He signaled for Lindir to
do the same and once the other Elf had seated himself, he began to explain.
“The Shadow is consuming Thranduil and I have found a way to slow down the
process. However, it means that I have to stay close to him.”
Lindir nodded once. “I
have heard rumors that the King has fallen ill, but I was not sure how much was
rumor and how much truth. Do you want me to inform Lord Elrond?”
“Not yet.” Erestor felt
conflicted. He knew he should update Elrond, but at the same time he didn’t want
Thranduil to feel like his trust had been betrayed. “We will wait a little
longer.”
Lindir wasn’t sure what to
make of that, but he would obey. “Do you want me to stay in our talan and wait
for more news?”
Erestor shook his head.
“Nay, I want you to remain close. Thranduil does not want his subjects to learn
of his true state, but he might tolerate your presence. I need someone to look
over him when I cannot be close.”
“Of course.” Lindir wanted
to help in whatever way possible. “Is there anything I can do right now?”
“Go to the kitchens and
bring us something to eat. Make sure it is a light meal. I doubt Thranduil’s
stomach can deal with much food.” Erestor rose from the chair, and Lindir
followed his example, eager to carry out his instructions.
As the white-haired Elf
left to go to the kitchens, Erestor raised a hand and pinched the bridge of his
nose. He had to take good care of himself. The Sindarin Elf needed him strong
and in control. Looking outside, he found that Arien was blazing hotly. Maybe
he should take Thranduil outside to sit in the sun? Arien’s rays always seemed
to strengthen the blond. He started back to Thranduil’s chambers and was
stunned to find them empty. Where had Thranduil gone?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Elrond remained conscious
during their ride to Thranduil’s talan. He hung helplessly in the sentry’s
arms, as the spider’s venom had rendered him paralyzed. He was incapable of
even the tiniest movement and it was growing increasingly hard to draw in his
next breath. The poison was also affecting his heart and lungs.
The horse’s hoofs barely
touched the ground as she hurried towards the talan.
Panic coursed through
Elrond’s mind. He wasn’t ready to die and travel to the Great Halls, but he had
little choice in the matter. The spider’s hooks had caused a large wound in his
side and his shoulder was throbbing from the bite. He had heard Glorfindel’s
command to take him to Thranduil, but what if the King refused to help him?
What would Thranduil do when realizing that his enemy was at his mercy?
A few moments later, loud
voices sounded all around him and he was lowered into arms that gently caught
him. Although his thoughts were blurry, he saw several golden-haired Elves
fussing over him, carrying him into a talan. They had made it to the heart of
Mirkwood.
They laid him down on a
soft bed and an Elf, dressed in the robes of a healer, moved closer, anxiously
hovering above him, but not touching him. A sickening feeling settled in
Elrond’s stomach. Thranduil had forbidden him to ever enter Mirkwood and had
vowed to end his life should he ever dare cross the borders.
And now he had done that
very thing because Legolas had assured him Thranduil was all bark and no bite.
/I was a fool. I should have known Thranduil would never change his mind. These
healers are afraid to help me. I will die after all. Aiya, Glorfindel, Arwen,
Elladan and Elrohir, I should never have left Imladris./
He wished he could see his
loved ones one last time, but realized he wouldn’t be granted that luxury.
Thranduil’s love had changed to hate and that hatred would be his undoing now.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Sire, please forgive me
for disturbing your peace, but…” The servant stared at his King in shock, and
then bit down the agony he felt at seeing his
ruler in such a pitiful
state. The rumors that Thranduil was fading were roaming the Kingdom, but he
hadn’t fully believed them to be true...
until now. Thranduil’s wretched appearance confirmed the rumors. May the
Valar help them, for they loved their King and they didn’t want to lose him!
“What is it?” Thranduil
pushed himself to his feet and tried to ignore the fatigue that had settled in
his bones. He tried to appear regal, but one look at the other Elf’s face told
him he had failed miserably.
“Lord Elrond of Imladris
has arrived and is badly injured. Only one guard accompanied him and he told us
that they were attacked by spiders. Apparently Lord Glorfindel is still
fighting the spiders and has sent Lord Elrond here, hoping that you will heal
him.”
Thranduil reacted
instinctively. “Send out two patrols to aid Glorfindel in his battle. And where
can I find Elrond?” Emotions whirled inside him. He hadn’t even known the half-Elf
was near! In the past he had been able to sense Elrond’s presence, but his
senses had dulled. What was the half-Elf doing in Mirkwood? Had Elrond
forgotten he risked his life by coming here?
Sweet pain ripped through
his heart, recalling the half-Elf’s compassionate eyes. It had been those very
eyes that had made him fall in love with Elrond so long ago. And now the
half-Elf was here in Mirkwood, injured and in need of his help!
“We took him to the
healers, but… They are hesitant to help him, as you proclaimed the half-Elf
unwelcome here.”
Thranduil raised a hand to
silence the other Elf. “Carry my instructions to my men and tell them to hurry.
I will see to Elrond in the meantime.” The servant turned and broke out into a
run, whilst Thranduil drew in a deep breath. He had hoped to never see Elrond
again, but he couldn’t let the half-Elf unduly suffer.
/Once I am dead he will be
the only force capable of stopping Sauron. Middle Earth cannot afford to lose
him and therefore I will aid him and see to his survival./ He should inform
Erestor that Elrond had arrived, but he didn’t have the time to do so. /The
bond will tell him where to find
Thranduil, who was wearing
a dark green robe, draped a brown cloak over his shoulders, which would
hopefully keep him warm, and then left the royal talan to tend to Elrond.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Glorfindel stared until
the horse, rider and charge had disappeared from his view. Elrond’s expression
haunted him. Was the half-Elf mortally wounded? The spider’s venom was strong
and, although it seldom killed Elves, Elrond’s side had also been pierced,
which would lead to extensive blood loss. Combined, the two injuries might
demand Elrond’s life.
Tears blinded him
momentarily. It wasn’t as though he could do anything to aid Elrond now. He had
to hope Thranduil would put his hatred aside and help the half-Elf. All he
could do was turn his rage toward these spiders and make sure they would never
hurt anyone again.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Elrond’s mouth and throat
had gone completely dry, making swallowing extremely painful. He stared at the
ceiling and tried to remain as calm as possible. It was a strange thing:
feeling the poison spread through his body, paralyzing his muscles and organs,
whilst he remained sound in mind. This actually frightened him. He had faced
death many times, but he had never thought he would leave Arda in this way.
Suddenly the door opened
and he instinctively studied the Elf that now entered. The three healers who
had been staring helplessly at him now bowed respectfully. Elrond grew alert.
Why would they bow to the grey-haired Elf? His eyes suddenly met the other’s
and he realized the truth in that instant. /Thranduil? What happened to you?/
The Sindarin Elf moved
slowly, as if it pained him to walk about too much. Thranduil whispered softly
and the healers hurried to carry out his orders. Elrond managed to establish
eye contact as Thranduil approached and he cringed mentally, realizing the
formerly golden-haired Elf had become a dreadful apparition, who now hovered
above him.
Thranduil noticed the
doubt and apprehension in Elrond’s blue eyes and smiled sorrowfully. Elrond
probably expected him to turn away in disgust. But fighting the Shadow had
greatly changed him and he sensed the other’s suffering as if it were his own.
Resting a hand on Elrond’s clammy brow, he nodded. “The venom is very strong,
but I will try to counteract it.”
Elrond’s eyebrows would
have risen questioningly if he had still been able to do so, but all he could
do now was to stare at Thranduil. He couldn’t help but feel sympathy for the other
Elf, now that Sauron’s Shadow had reduced the formerly proud King to this. /I
should have come earlier. Maybe Vilya would have made a difference./ But he was
too weak to wield her now.
“Sire?” One of the healers
had reappeared and handed Thranduil a wooden bowl.
“Remove his clothes,”
ordered Thranduil. He caught the worry in Elrond’s expressive eyes and realized
it was the only way the half-Elf had left to communicate with him. “Rest
assured. I won’t let you die.”
Hearing that reassurance
stunned Elrond, who was now being manhandled by the healers as they removed his
clothes as ordered. Naked now, he stared at Thranduil, wanting to ask what
would happen next, but the paralysis made that impossible.
Thranduil caught an echo
of Elrond’s thoughts. “We are both suffering,” he whispered soothingly as he
signaled for the healers to leave the room. “I will try to ease yours.”
Elrond’s panic mounted now
that they were alone. Whilst the healers had been close he had felt somewhat
safe. But now that only Thranduil remained, he felt completely at the other’s
mercy. What if the Sindarin Elf remembered his threats and decided to keep his
vow to end his life? He didn’t fear for himself, but he was afraid of the
reaction his death would trigger in his loved ones. Unexpectedly Thranduil’s
fingers settled on his side, rubbing some sort of ointment onto his skin.
Questioningly, he sought out Thranduil’s eyes again. /What are you doing?/
Thranduil sighed deeply
and continued to rub the ointment –- which contained the antidote to the
spider’s venom -- onto Elrond’s skin. After covering the injured side with the
cream, he bandaged the wound to slow down -- and hopefully stop -- the
bleeding. Next, he cautiously rolled the half-Elf onto his side to attend to
the shoulder. He cringed, seeing the imprint that the fangs had left behind on
Elrond’s skin. “You thought I would let you die,” Thranduil said in a sad tone.
At first Elrond was
alarmed when Thranduil’s fingers gently probed the bite mark. But then he
realized that the Sindarin Elf was cleaning the wound. Thranduil rubbed more of
the ointment onto the damaged area and then bandaged this wound as well.
Helpless, he listened as Thranduil spoke again.
“Not many know this, but I
hate the spiders with all my heart. They took my oldest son away from me.”
Thranduil placed the bowl aside momentarily and rolled Elrond onto his back
again. Sensing the half-Elf’s terror, he allowed for the eye contact to be
reestablished. “Valthoron was twelve years old when he escaped his minder’s
care and ventured into the dark woods. The spiders quickly found him and, like
you, he was stabbed. But they didn’t stop there. They took pleasure in
tormenting him and bit him again… and again.”
Elrond listened in growing
horror. He had never known Thranduil had had two sons.
Thranduil rubbed the
ointment onto the rest of Elrond’s body, taking great care not to miss a spot.
After finishing the front, he rolled the half-Elf onto his stomach. Now that
the eye contact was gone Elrond grew ill at ease again and Thranduil reacted at
once. Using his ability to reach out mentally, he soothed the half-Elf’s
terrified thoughts and continued talking. “When Valthoron died I vowed to make
sure the spiders would never claim another life.”
The ointment was beginning
to enfold its affects and Elrond experienced a burning sensation on those parts
of his body that Thranduil had already treated. Entranced, he began to relax,
listening to the Sindarin Elf’s soothing voice.
“This antidote will draw
the poison from your body. You will feel hot for quite some time. Soon you will
become feverish. In a few days, you will begin to feel stronger.” Touching
Elrond in this way reminded Thranduil of the attraction he had once felt for
the half-Elf. An echo of those feelings had remained throughout the years.
Although he was no longer in love with Elrond, he did care about him. He tried
to keep his touches clinical when he rubbed the substance on Elrond’s backside,
and then helped his charge roll onto his back. For one moment their glances met
and Thranduil flinched, realizing Elrond suspected he still cared. Needing to
distance himself, Thranduil left the bedside.
Elrond felt confused, but
no longer feared for his safety. The fact that Thranduil had reached out to
touch his mind had taken him aback, but it had left him with the knowledge that
the Sinda was acting in his best interests and wanted to heal him. His eyes
sought out Thranduil’s when the other Elf covered him with several blankets.
Elrond tried to speak, but his lips failed him.
“Do not strain yourself,”
offered Thranduil. “It will take a while for your body to recover from the
venom. You should rest now.” Thranduil, exhausted as well, pulled up a chair
and collapsed onto it. He needed Erestor’s strength to replenish what he had
lost whilst tending to Elrond. “Try to sleep.”
Elrond finally realized
that Legolas had been right. Thranduil didn’t hate him, didn’t wish him harm.
The threats had been the Sindarin Elf’s way to keep him from finding out that Thranduil
still cared. /I have been blind./
“You are safe here,
Peredhel. I do not wish you any harm. You can rest… Sleep now.” Thranduil
leaned back in the chair, feeling drained and tired. Arien’s rays now settled
on his face and he sighed blissfully.
But Elrond still didn’t
feel completely at ease and it kept him from falling asleep. Unexpected
movement behind Thranduil caught his attention.
Erestor quickly moved
toward them. He had encountered a guard as he had made his way back to
Thranduil’s chambers and the Elf had quickly informed him of what had happened.
He had hurried here after one healer had told him the way.
“Elrond? Thranduil?” He
came to a standstill in between them. His right hand sought out Thranduil’s,
squeezing it reassuringly, whilst his other came to rest on Elrond’s icy brow.
Thranduil smiled happily
at having Erestor close again. Now that Erestor was touching him, energy
traveled down the link, strengthening him. “I already tended to his injuries,”
said Thranduil, trying to reassure Erestor. “We must be patient now.” The
antidote would fight the poison and all they could do was wait.
Erestor looked into
Elrond’s eyes and tried to soothe the half-Elf, who looked stricken. “You are
safe here. Thranduil and I will watch over you. Rest.”
Elrond gave in to his
fatigue, knowing instinctively that Erestor would never lie to him. What
Thranduil had said was true then; he was safe here. Drifting off into sleep, he
hoped the ointment’s healing potion was strong enough to ensure his survival
and hopefully his full recovery.
TBC
Betaed by Niamh and
All remaining mistakes are mine.