Title: Second Chances.

Author: Morgana (morganalebeau@yahoo.com)

Homepage; http://www.avalon.cobweb.nl

Pairings: Elrond/Elros, Glorfindel/Erestor, Elrond/Ereinion and Elrond/Celebrian mentioned.

Summary; Elrond is stunned, finding the Valar returned Elros to Arda. After the joy of being reunited with his twin, old issues begin to surface. Elrond has to face his feelings and make his peace with past decisions. At the same time Glorfindel finds himself responsible for a very cranky chief advisor who becomes bed ridden. Accepting his duty to care for Erestor, Glorfindel finds the advisor is hiding old hurt and a fragile hope. Set after Celebrian’s departure from Imladris.

Rating: NC-17 for explicit m/m sex/ and twincest.

Disclaimer: They are Tolkien’s, not mine… such a pity!

Warning: This is AU and fluff! Don't expect a plot or deep ponderings! And oh, yeah, there is twincest!

 

 

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Manip by SayAye

Part 1

Although he had never been here before, the place felt familiar, almost like home. He looked about, admiring the beauty found in the stone statues and the elegance of a single drop of dew that flowed down a rose petal. Looking at the large collection of books, he sighed, wishing he had the time to read them. But he wasn’t even sure if he was here to stay or merely passing through. Much depended on Elrond’s decision.

 

“Can I be of some assistance?” Glorfindel had been on his way to collect some scrolls when he came across a stranger standing in Elrond’s study -- a place usually off limits to visitors. “Do you need directions?”

 

“Directions…”

 

Glorfindel shivered as a chill swept down his spine. /That voice… That tone…/ Why was his friend acting in this odd way? “Elrond?”

 

“I am not Elrond,” the dark-haired Elf said, keeping his back toward the Elda. “But I would like to speak with him.”

 

“Your voice sounds just like his,” said Glorfindel thoughtfully. Looking closer, he quickly realized that this stranger was of the same height and build as Elrond, and his hair was raven as well. All it lacked was the butterfly hair clip Elrond usually wore. “May I inquire what your business is here tonight?” Why had the servants allowed this stranger to enter Elrond’s private study?

 

“My business here tonight…” He paused to gather his thoughts. “My business is with Elrond Half-Elven.”

 

Glorfindel, alert and growing increasingly suspicious, advanced on the stranger. “In that case, give me your name and I will inquire if Lord Elrond can see you.”

 

“My name…” He slowly turned around, realizing he couldn’t put off this confrontation much longer, as Glorfindel would find out the truth eventually.

 

Glorfindel sucked in his breath in shock. Elrond’s mirror image stood before him. Granted, this Elf had fewer lines of worry etched onto his brow, but he could easily pass for the half-Elf.

 

“They used to call me Elros before I made my decision to belong to the race of Man.” His calm, gray eyes searched Glorfindel’s, easily reading the stunned disbelief in them. “Maybe now you could inquire if Elrond is willing to see me?”

 

“I do not understand…” Glorfindel’s voice trailed off. “Elros died many centuries ago.” The resemblance this stranger bore Elrond was uncanny and greatly worried Glorfindel, who for some reason didn’t believe this was Elros incarnate. “Who are you and what is the nature of your business here?”

 

Elros gave Glorfindel a look filled with understanding. “I am more than willing to explain myself, and past events, but I would prefer to do it only once. So if you could contact Elrond now, I would be grateful.”

 

“You cannot be Elros!” And yet the expression in the calm eyes, the well-hidden nervous twitch near the corner of the lips, the regal posture, and the arched eyebrow seemed so incredibly familiar. “Elrond? Are you playing games with me?” But why would the half-Elf do that? “’Tis you, is it not? Elrond?”

 

“I assure you that I am Elros; now kindly fetch my twin for I need to speak with him.” Like Elrond, his temper occasionally got the better of him, but this time he managed to control it. “Now.”

 

Glorfindel swallowed hard. His mouth had gone dry and he nodded instinctively. “I will fetch Elrond.” He was convinced that he wouldn’t find Elrond in his rooms because the half-Elf was standing in front of him. What had caused his friend to lose his sanity?

 

“Go and fetch him for me.” Elros felt relieved when Glorfindel finally got into motion, almost running out of the study. Now that he was alone again, he surrendered to his nervousness by placing his hands on the back of a chair, clawing at the wood. He appeared calm and controlled, but the truth was that he had no idea how Elrond would react upon seeing him.

 

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Erestor was on his way back to the library, carrying several heavy books, when Glorfindel crashed into him, knocking the books out of his hands and causing him to lose his balance. He fell, the back of his head hit the sharp edge of a side table and he landed hard on the floor with a sickening snap sounding from his neck and lower back, causing a burning pain to radiate through his body from those areas. Aiya, that hurt!

 

Glorfindel stared at Erestor in shock. He hadn’t been looking where he was going and as a result he had knocked Erestor off his feet. “I apologize, Erestor, but I am in a hurry.” Reckoning that the advisor could take care of himself, he continued to march toward Elrond’s private chambers, but hearing a pain-filled whimper, he stopped dead in his tracks.

 

Had that whimper really originated from Erestor’s lips or had he just imagined it? Turning around, he studied the advisor, who was awkwardly trying to sit up, supporting his head with his hands – and failing miserably. “Are you all right?” He felt torn, realizing he should be informing Elrond, but at the same time he couldn’t leave Erestor if the Elf was in pain, and it definitely seemed that way.

 

“I am not all right!” scowled Erestor, rolling onto his side as his neck and back still vibrated with spiraling pain. Carefully probing the injury with his fingers, he found that warm blood was flowing down his neck, originating from the back of his head where he had hit the table. “But I can manage! There is no need to pause and help me.”

 

Glorfindel winced, hearing the sarcastic tone to Erestor’s voice. It was true that they barely got along and managed civilized politeness at best, but now he felt he had to offer Erestor his help. “Let me help you back to your feet.” He extended his hand and nearly pulled it away again when Erestor glared, sending dangerous daggers at him.

 

“Be on your way, Glorfindel, and leave me alone.”

 

No one could quite explain why Elrond’s captain and chief councilor were always at odds with each other. They fought verbally on a constant basis and an icy atmosphere descended onto the room whenever both were present. Glorfindel had grown accustomed to that hostility and had long ago stopped wondering what had caused them to behave in that manner in the first place. “I…” Glorfindel looked down the corridor. He was so close to Elrond’s chambers right now!

 

“Go on! Do not mind m…e…” His voice hitched on the last word and Erestor’s eyes widened as pain traveled down his spine from his neck. The discomfort would fade within the next few days, as his Elven healing ability would take care of the injury, but right now he was in agony. Warm blood was sliding down his neck and he felt grateful that his dark hair hid it from view.

 

Glorfindel sighed. He would help Erestor and then quickly alert Elrond so he could return and assist Erestor to his quarters or the Healing House. A chair stood close by and Glorfindel quickly made up his mind. “We will do this my way.”

 

Erestor held his breath, shocked to feel Glorfindel’s arms go around his shoulders, pulling him to his feet. “Nooooo!” More pain erupted from his neck and back, and he pleadingly stared at the Elda, hoping Glorfindel would let go of him.

 

Glorfindel’s features contorted, realizing he was adding to Erestor’s pain. “Let us try a different approach, then.” Ignoring Erestor’s futile attempts at swatting his hands away, he placed one hand beneath the advisor’s knees and the other below his shoulders, lifting him slowly.

 

Erestor bit his bottom lip as the pain remained constant, but bearable. He sighed, relieved, when Glorfindel finally placed him on the chair. And now what?

 

“Wait here. I will be right back,” said Glorfindel softly, truly regretting accidentally hurting the dark-haired Elf.

 

Erestor gave the blond a frustrated look. “And where am I supposed to go? I can hardly move!”

 

“I am sorry,” said Glorfindel softly, gathering the books and placing them next to the chair. “Just wait here for me. I won’t be long.”

 

Frustrated, Erestor watched Glorfindel sprint down the corridor. “Elbereth, why did this have to happen to me? He won’t be back. He will get caught up with something and forget about me.” Erestor sighed, realizing he had to deal with this situation without Glorfindel’s help. Hopefully a servant would pass by shortly.

 

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“Elrond? Elrond!” Glorfindel was panting softly by the time he reached the half-Elf’s rooms. He didn’t really expect to find Elrond in here as the Peredhel was still in his study. There simply couldn’t be two of them – not any more!

 

“Glorfindel? What is amiss?” Elrond rose from the chair he had been sitting on, reading, and advanced on his friend. “You look like you have seen a ghost.”

 

Glorfindel stared at the half-Elf in disbelief. Elrond was here; did that mean it really was Elros in the study? But how? /The Valar allowed me to return, why not Elros? But Elros was not Elven. His fëa should not have traveled to the Halls of Mandos in the first place./ “I have seen a ghost indeed,” said Glorfindel, finally regaining his wits. “I did not want to believe it at first, but now that you are here, I know I saw Elros. He is in your study, waiting for you.” Elrond would think him mad, but he had felt the same way when happening upon Elros. “Go now!”

 

Elrond arched an eyebrow. “Have you drunk too much wine?” Why was Glorfindel bringing up old pains? He had lost Elros long ago!

 

“No, I am speaking the truth! He really is in the study and he wants to talk to you. You have to go there, now.” Pain was reflected in Elrond’s eyes and Glorfindel wished he could take it away, but if this really was Elros, Elrond had to face his twin.

 

“Glorfindel,” said Elrond, soothingly resting a hand on the captain’s shoulder. “Elros died many centuries ago. I do not know what is causing you to act in this way, but we should find out. Maybe we should go the Healing House where I can examine you.” Worried, he searched Glorfindel’s blue eyes.

 

“I know he died, but he is back! I did not want to believe it either at first, but I returned from the Halls of Waiting, so why shouldn’t Elros?”

 

“Because my twin chose not to belong to the Firstborn. His soul could not have traveled to the Halls of Mandos.” Elrond began to steer Glorfindel toward the doorway. “Come with me to the Healing House. Maybe you will calm down there.”

 

“I know I am acting oddly, but I am telling you the truth! Elros is in your study! Now get going! Don’t keep him waiting!” Glorfindel took charge, pushing Elrond toward another exit, which would also take the half-Elf to the study, but it would keep Elrond from happening upon an injured chief advisor on his way. Having to explain that one as well would only make things worse. “Go now!”

 

“Glorfindel, I worry about you.” Elrond studied his friend’s eyes. “Why are you making this up?” The half-Elf wasn’t giving up yet. Maybe if he calmed Glorfindel down, his friend would confide in him.

 

“He really is in the study!” repeated Glorfindel, growing impatient. “Humor me and go to your study! If he is not there and I am hallucinating you can tell me, but you are going there now!”

 

Elrond realized it was best not to argue with his friend, though his worries for Glorfindel increased. Glorfindel had never acted this irrationally before. “Fine, I will go to my study, but it will be empty. Why don’t you come with me to convince yourself that no one is there?”


”I cannot do that.” Glorfindel’s brow furrowed. “I had a little accident on my way over here.” He still continued to push the half-Elf into the corridor.

 

“Accident?” What was this all about? Elrond was tempted to order Glorfindel to accompany him to the Healing House right now, but the blond seemed determined to take him to his study. Before he knew it, Elrond was standing in front of the beautifully carved door that gave access to his study.

 

“Now go talk to him.” Glorfindel nodded encouragingly. “I am not hallucinating.” He pushed down the door handle and dragged the Peredhel inside with him.

 

Elrond suddenly grabbed Glorfindel’s wrist, determined to show Glorfindel that he was hallucinating after all. “See? There is no one here…” His voice trailed off, seeing a dark-haired Elf standing in front of the fireplace, his back toward them. His hold on Glorfindel’s wrist loosened and the Elda used that moment to make his escape. Elrond let him go, wondering what this stranger was doing in his study. “My study is off limits to guests.”

 

Elros turned around slowly and then met his twin’s eyes. “Even to me, gwenneth?”

 

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Erestor did his utmost to ignore the pain, but a whimper still escaped his lips. He had always managed to stay away from any grave injuries in his long life, but that had changed once Glorfindel had joined Elrond’s household. The blond was a walking menace, as far as he was concerned. When there was some sort of trouble, he could count on Glorfindel being at the source of it.

 

“What do I do now?” He had tried pushing himself to his feet, but paralysis was slowly setting in. He could hardly move his neck, and his legs and back also refused to cooperate. His injury would get worse before it would get better. And the fact that he was sprawled on this chair – rather uncomfortably – wasn’t helping either.

 

Normally, these corridors were swarming with Elves, but now they were deserted. Why did these things always happen to him? In the end, he realized that he had only one option left; to wait for Glorfindel to return. /And what if he does not come back? What if he has forgotten about me? Why would he remember me? I am only the cranky advisor, making his life difficult because I insist he attends Elrond’s council, and…/

 

“Erestor! I am sorry that it took me so long, but Elrond was… uncooperative.” Glorfindel came running around the corner, concentrating on the injured Elf. “Are you feeling any better?”

 

Erestor glowered at him. “If I were, I would not still be lying here!” Acting cross with Glorfindel had long since become second nature to him. It was easier to act infuriated than charmed. He had to emotionally distance himself from the Elda, knowing Glorfindel didn’t feel the same way about him. He had realized that a long time ago, hence the hostility between them: it served to cover up his attraction. And he could always count on Glorfindel to get angry with him in turn. But then again, even when the Elda was cross with him, it did mean he was getting *some* attention. He would always take the negative attention over none at all.

 

“I should take you to the Healing House,” mumbled Glorfindel thoughtfully.

 

“No, I refuse to go there. If you have to take me anywhere, take me to my rooms.” Erestor didn’t want any of the healers fussing over him. “I just need to rest so my body can recuperate from taking this fall.”

 

“Are you certain?” Glorfindel cocked his head and his eyes narrowed. “Can you move at all?”

 

Erestor gnashed his teeth and slightly moved his legs. “Of course I can! Now help me back to my rooms and go harass someone else. You’ve already caused enough problems for me.”

 

Glorfindel’s expression grew shadowed. “I didn’t do it on purpose,” he said in a child-like tone. Taking a step toward Erestor, he gently pushed his arms beneath the advisor’s body, lifting him.

 

Erestor bit his bottom lip, but couldn’t stop a pained whimper from fleeing his lips. He could tell that the Elda was trying to be careful with him, but he still hurt.

 

Glorfindel also realized that his charge was in pain, but he couldn’t put him down again. What Erestor needed was a competent healer, a warm bed and lots of rest; things, which he wouldn’t get lying sprawled on a chair in a drafty corridor. “Can you put your arm around my neck?”

 

Erestor mumbled something unintelligible, but managed to comply. Now that he had a firm hold on Glorfindel, he was slightly more comfortable in the other Elf’s arms. Oh, what he wouldn’t give for this to be a romantic encounter instead!

 

Glorfindel made his way to Erestor’s quarters. “Can you push down the door handle? I do not have to seem any hands free.” If it hadn’t been for the pained expression on Erestor’s face, he might have found this funny. /I am carrying him over the threshold./ Chuckling mentally, he wondered about the advisor. /I doubt anyone will ever carry him over the threshold in *that* way. Our chief councilor is not one for marriage. I cannot seriously think of a single Elf who would dare courting him./

 

Erestor pushed down the door handle and bit down the pain that swept through his lower back. Normally, he would never allow Glorfindel inside his rooms, but he really didn’t have much of a choice.

 

Glorfindel was pleasantly surprised when he stepped into Erestor’s rooms. He had expected them to be sparsely furnished and chilly -- much like their inhabitant – but he found them warm and luxurious instead. The fireplace had already been lit and oil lamps adequately illuminated the bedroom. Holding his breath involuntarily, Glorfindel studied the exquisite tapestries, beautifully woven in bright colors, which decorated the room. Several bookshelves made from dark oak were piled with scrolls and books. Splendid wooden carvings hung on a wall and the detail of them amazed him. Who had carved these Elves and animals? The big and comfortable four-poster bed standing next to the fireplace with the covers already turned down caught Glorfindel’s attention next.

 

Erestor, growing impatient now that Glorfindel seemed absorbed in studying his quarters, tugged at a golden tress, unable to reach something else due to his compromising position. “Put me down!”

 

Glorfindel shook himself from his musings and advanced on the bed. Silk sheets, he noticed, and big, fluffy pillows. Not what he had expected at all. Concentrating on his charge and his task at hand, he slowly lowered Erestor onto the bed. “Your rooms are… different from what I had thought they would be.” He cringed at seeing the hurt – and knowing – expression in Erestor’s dark eyes.

 

“You expected them to be as cold and chilling as I am?” Erestor wanted to be furious with the Elda, but lacked the strength. He wanted to roll onto his other side so he would face away from Glorfindel and curl up, but he couldn’t move much, not when this terrible pain tormented his back. “You brought me to my rooms. You can leave now.” He started to shiver and tried to reach for the warm blankets, but found they were out of his reach.

 

But Glorfindel had noticed. “Let me help.” He pulled the covers up and tucked them around Erestor’s form. If looks could kill, he would be dead now, but he tried to ignore the venomous look in those dark eyes. “I am not certain I should leave you alone. You can hardly move and—“

 

Erestor cut him short. “I will manage.”

 

Glorfindel, realizing Erestor was determined to dismiss him, slowly made his way over to the side table. He filled a glass with water and placed it on the nightstand, easily within Erestor’s reach. “Are you certain you want me to leave?”

 

“I am certain. Now kindly leave my rooms.” He had never wanted Glorfindel to see his quarters in the first place.

 

Deciding arguing wouldn’t get him anywhere, Glorfindel nodded. “I will leave you then and I offer you my apologies again. I was in a hurry and not looking where I was going.”

 

Erestor’s left hand turned into a fist beneath the covers. Why couldn’t Glorfindel just let him be?

 

Glorfindel knew better than to voice his objections, determined to check on Erestor during the night when the dark-haired Elf wouldn’t notice his presence. He wouldn’t be able to sleep anyway, knowing Erestor was in pain and alone in his rooms. “I will be on my way then.” He had to find out how Elrond had handled finding Elros in his study, providing the stranger really was the long dead twin. Looking over his shoulder before closing the door behind him, Glorfindel saw hints of agony on Erestor’s brow. “Maybe I should stay?”

 

“No, leave me.” Erestor’s tone was clipped and controlled, wishing Glorfindel would finally close the door behind him, so he could stop pretending he was fine when in reality he was in severe pain.

 

“As you wish,” said Glorfindel. /I don’t care if you want to be left alone. I will be back to check on you tonight./ When he closed the door behind him, he felt guilty and upset, surprised that he was worried about the chief councilor, whose presence he barely managed to tolerate most of the time. /But it was my fault. I ran into him./ Burdened by the knowledge that he had caused this accident – and Erestor’s  pain – he reluctantly headed for Elrond’s study. He wanted to be there in case his friend needed his support.

 

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Now that Glorfindel was finally gone, Erestor’s eyes widened with pain and he released a series of tormented whimpers. The best thing he could do was to move as little as possible and allow his body to heal itself.

 

Second Chances

Part 2

 

 

 

Elrond stared at his reflection in shock. “Elros?” It couldn’t be, yet every fiber of his being was telling him he was standing opposite his twin. “Elros?” Swallowing hard, he felt frozen. Unable to move, he studied the other Elf.

 

Elros was dressed in gray robes, lined with the darkest blue and specks of silver. His long, raven mane was braided into a single plait and the large, gray eyes hid nothing from him. This was Elros, he was sure of that, but… “I don’t understand.” Afraid to believe that his dearest wish had come true, he remained at a respectful distance. Elros would surely disappear once he tried to reach for him!

 

Elros was going through a similar process, seeing his twin after so long a time. Elrond had always possessed a sense of authority he had lacked and yet, at the same time, his twin also radiated compassion. “I assure you it is I, gwenneth.” He felt unable to take that first step, lacking the courage to cross the distance between them – much like Elrond did.

 

Standing opposite each other, their eyes searched the others’. In the end, it was Elrond who gathered his courage first. “I know it is you. I can sense it, but…” Taking a step closer to his twin, he cautiously raised a hand and let it hover against Elros’ face, not yet touching. “Are you real?”

 

“I am real.” Now that his brother was reaching out, Elros felt encouraged and caught his twin’s wavering hand in his. Upon contact, both trembled, realizing this was really happening. Elros stared in amazement at his brother’s hand, which now rested inside his. Elrond felt warm and real, and acting instinctively, he tugged at the arm, pulling Elrond close against him. His arms came up behind his twin’s back and he hugged him close, never wanting to let go again. “Aiya, I missed you so much!”

 

Shocked that Elros hadn’t disappeared, and that there was a warm and solid body against his, Elrond finally completed the embrace, brining his arms up behind his twin’s. “Am I dreaming? Hallucinating? What sweet madness is this?”

 

Elros smiled warmly, burying his face in his twin’s hair. “No dream. No hallucination. No madness.” Elros preferred action over words and settled for holding his younger brother tightly. “I missed you so much!”

 

Elrond, trying to wrap his mind around the fact that he was actually holding his twin in his arms, gasped for breath and then his silent sobs started. Trembling fiercely, he pressed closer against his twin. “This cannot be!”

 

Realizing Elrond was crying, Elros pulled back to establish eye contact with his twin. “’Tis really happening.”

 

“But how? When? Why? Who?” Elrond desperately buried his fingers in his twin’s mane. Now that he had a tight hold on Elros, he refused to let go again. Tears flowed down his face, dripped from his chin and onto Elros’ clothes. “I saw you die!” He had been there during his brother’s last moments and had seen him release his last breath.

 

“I will tell you, gwenneth, but we should probably sit down first before you faint in my arms.” Elrond had never acted this emotional before, but then again, one didn’t find a dead brother standing alive and well in one’s study every day. It was a lot to take in for Elrond. “Sit with me.” Guiding Elrond closer to the fireplace, he sat down, pulling his twin with him.

 

Elrond reacted automatically, settling down in his brother’s arms. Oh, how he had missed this: this feeling, this intimacy. “It must be a dream.”

 

“No, ‘tis not,” repeated Elros, slightly amused. Stroking the dark hair, he maintained a tight hold on his younger brother. He had missed this as much as Elrond had. “Rest against me and be assured that I won’t vanish on you whilst I tell you what happened to me these last few days.”

 

Elrond rested his head on his twin’s shoulder, listening to the soothing and slightly entrancing tone of his brother’s voice. “I am listening.”

 

Elros smiled, wondering how his twin would react to his tidings. “The Valar sent me back, gwenneth.” They hadn’t told him why. They had just hinted that it had something to do with Elrond. “And I am here to stay…That is, if you want me.” Seeing the happy expression in his twin’s gray eyes when Elrond raised his head to look at him, he already knew the answer.

 

“You have a home here with me.” Elrond gingerly raised a hand and placed it against his brother’s face. He knew Elros had much more to tell him, but that could wait. First, he wanted to bask in his brother’s presence and love. Snuggling up to his older twin, he relished the silence and listened to Elros’ steady breathing.

 

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An hour later, Elrond gingerly freed himself from his brother’s embrace. “I am completely forgetting about my duties as your host. You must be tired, even hungry maybe?”

 

Elros gave his brother a grateful smile. “I am, actually. It takes time, getting used to being alive again.”

 

Now that piqued Elrond’s curiosity. “May I ask… Are you mortal or…?” In what form had the Valar sent Elros back?

 

“I honestly don’t know,” replied Elros, “And I am not very eager to test my mortality or immortality. I have the feeling we will find out in time.” Brushing a strand of knotted hair away from his twin’s face, he smiled warmly. “I missed having you close.” There was so much more that he wanted to tell Elrond, but he didn’t have the strength or courage to address those matters now. He needed to eat and rest, and maybe then he would feel confident enough to bring them up.

 

“Come with me to my rooms. You will be comfortable there.” Elrond refused to give up their physical contact and held onto his twin’s hand, whilst pulling his older brother to his feet. Standing close, they studied each other. Elrond still had a hard time believing he was actually looking into his twin’s eyes. “Don’t ever leave me again, gweniaur. When you died—“

 

Quick to silence his brother, Elros placed a finger across Elrond’s lips. “Not here, not now. Later.” He also knew they had to address this, but not when they both felt this emotional at being reunited. Folding an arm around his twin’s waist, Elros allowed himself to be led into the corridor. “I scared Glorfindel, didn’t I?”

 

“I am afraid you did. When he entered my rooms he looked like he had seen a ghost. And when he told me about you I seriously considered taking him to the Healing House, but he refused and dragged me over here instead. I am glad he did.” Elrond gave his twin a sparkling smile. He maintained his hold on Elros’ hand, still worried his twin might disappear unexpectedly.

 

Fortunately, they encountered no one in the corridors, and when Elrond closed the door to his quarters behind him, he was struck by the feeling of how right it felt to have his twin in here. “Please seat yourself. I will tell one of the servants to fetch something to eat.” He disliked letting Elros out of his sight for even the shortest moment, but he needed to instruct Lindir.

 

Elros, sensing his twin’s insecurity and need, advanced on his brother’s bed, sat down and stretched his limbs when he had lain down. He couldn’t remember the last time he had slept in a bed! Snuggling deeper into the comfort of the fabric, he sighed and closed his eyes. He was more tired than he had thought and slowly drifted off to into sleep.

 

By the time Elrond returned, he found his twin fast asleep on his bed. Curled up, Elros was hugging one of his pillows. Sitting down on the side of the bed, Elrond reveled in the fact that his brother’s face was young again, unmarred by the passing of time. When he had seen Elros last, his hair had been gray, his face wrinkled and his twin’s eyesight had diminished considerably. To see him restored to his former glory made his heart thunder madly.

 

Reaching out gently, he brushed a few wayward strands of hair behind his twin’s ear. He had forgotten how much he loved his older brother. When Elros had told him about his decision to become mortal, he had cried bitter tears, beseeching his twin to change his mind. But Elros had been determined to follow through, saying his destiny lay elsewhere.

 

He had been so incredibly lonely after Elros had left and he had tried hard to deal with the loss, but the truth was that his heart still carried the scars his twin’s choice had left behind. /And now he has returned to me. But for how long? And what are the Valar’s motives? Why sent him back? And does Elros have the answers to my questions?/

 

“My Lord? I brought the refreshments you requested.” Lindir, standing in the doorway, frowned at finding a dark-haired Elf in his Lord’s bed. The fact that Elrond was caressing the stranger’s hair puzzled him, but it was not his place to question his Lord. Placing the tray on the side table, he tried to catch a glimpse of the stranger’s face, but as the other’s back was turned toward him, he failed.

 

“You may leave now, Lindir, and please see to it that we are not disturbed.”

 

Lindir cleared his throat. “Lord Glorfindel is waiting in the corridor and seems rather determined to talk to you.”

 

Elrond sighed and then nodded his head. “He may enter.” There was no use in sending Glorfindel away. The blond knew about Elros and would remain close because he was worried.

 

Lindir left and Glorfindel hesitantly entered. Seeing the two dark-haired half-Elves on the bed, his heart expanded with relief. He made his way over to them and carefully rested a hand on Elrond’s shoulder. “How are you dealing with this?”

 

Elrond looked into his friend’s sea-blue eyes. “I am afraid he will leave me again.”

 

Glorfindel noticed the way Elrond’s fingers were curled around his twin’s – possessively. ”I understand that you feel that way, but… Are you sure this really is Elros?” He hated saying that, but he didn’t want Elrond to delude himself.

 

“Oh, this is my twin all right,” said Elrond thoughtfully. “We always shared a very strong connection and I can sense him in my mind.”

 

“Do you know how he—“

 

Elrond cut him short. “He said the Valar sent him back, but that he doesn’t know why.”

 

“And you believe him?”

 

“I have no reason to doubt his words.” Elrond stared into Glorfindel’s eyes. “I don’t know why he is here, or if he is mortal or not, but he is here and I am content with that. I want to savor the moments given to us. Yes, I have questions, but those can wait until he is rested and fed.”

 

Glorfindel nodded. “I do hope the Valar mean well with the two of you.” His last doubts that this wasn’t Elros vanished. Elrond was convinced that this was his twin, so he accepted that as the truth. “Take good care of him, my friend.”

 

“I will.” Elrond determinedly nodded his head. “I will never let him go again!”

 

Glorfindel smiled and headed back to the doorway, realizing the two of them would like some privacy. /And I still have to check on our cranky advisor./

 

Once Glorfindel had left, Elrond slid into place behind his twin. Now that he was lying comfortably, he pulled his older twin closer to him, wrapping arms and legs around him. He would make sure Elros didn’t vanish overnight!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Glorfindel soundlessly sneaked into Erestor’s rooms, which were still warmly lit by several oil lamps. Apparently the advisor hadn’t bothered to get up to extinguish them… or was Erestor still unable to move about much? After casting a look at Erestor to make sure that the dark-haired Elf was soundly asleep, Glorfindel began to explore the room.

 

First, he studied the tapestries, realizing they depicted Gondolin. Why hadn’t he noticed that the first time around? Stepping closer, his fingertips moved along the fabric. He could actually recognize parts of the city on this tapestry. How had Erestor gotten a hold of them? And why had he never shared them with him? Erestor knew how much he missed looking upon Gondolin’s glory, he had told the advisor.

 

Continuing his exploration, he gave the scrolls and books a critical look. Books on Gondolin – no surprise there – books on tactical warfare – now why would Erestor need those? – and books on lore. The scrolls he didn’t touch, for fear that the sound of paper being unfolded would wake the advisor. But he did pick up one of the carvings to study it closer. Surprised, he noticed it resembled him. Had Erestor made it? But no, Erestor surely didn’t possess the necessary skills to create it. There was a warm expression on the carving’s face and he doubted someone as cold and distant as Erestor could put it there.

 

These rooms breathed a caring and pleasant atmosphere, which confused him, considering their inhabitant. Turning around, he looked closely at Erestor. The dark-haired Elf looked young, even small in the big four-poster bed. The bed itself stunned him, having expected a cot instead. He moved over to it and knelt on the floor, not wanting to wake Erestor by sitting down on the side of the bed. Erestor was fast asleep, but there was also a pained expression on his face, and Glorfindel felt a twinge of guilt. /Maybe I should ask one of the healers to check on him?/

 

Uncertain what to do next, he figured it would be best to let Erestor sleep. He was about to get to his feet again, when the dark eyes unexpectedly filled with awareness. At the same time, a pained whimper fled Erestor’s lips. Panic appeared in the dark eyes and Glorfindel acted at once, kneeling down again. “What is amiss?”

 

Erestor, stunned to find Glorfindel in his rooms once more, tried to glare at the blond, but was utterly unable to pull it off. The pain made it impossible. “Cannot move…”

 

Glorfindel frowned, concerned. “What do you mean *exactly*?”

 

“I cannot move…” Erestor hated admitting his weakness to Glorfindel. “Cannot move my legs…”

 

“How about your arms?” Glorfindel was growing increasingly alarmed.

 

“I can move my fingers… but my arms are too heavy to move.” Erestor was trying hard to keep his mounting panic from his voice. “What did you do to me?”

 

“A healer needs to properly examine you,” said Glorfindel, feeling guilty for causing Erestor’s problems in the first place. “Let me fetch one.” The chilling look Erestor was giving him almost caused him to reconsider, but then he realized it was the dark-haired Elf’s way of hiding his pain and discomfort. Erestor probably hated being vulnerable and being dependent. “I cannot stand by and let this happen, knowing I caused it.”

 

Erestor gnashed his teeth in frustration. Rationally he knew Glorfindel was right, but… “Make sure it is either Elladan or Elrohir. I want no one else to examine me. And don’t you dare disturb Elrond over something this trivial.” Erestor wanted to point a warning finger at Glorfindel, but lacked the strength to do so.

 

Glorfindel considered telling Erestor about Elros’ arrival, but then decided this wasn’t the right time for it, not whilst the dark-haired Elf was in obvious pain. “I will be right back. Don’t go any—“

 

“And where would I go in my current condition?” sneered Erestor, upset now that the paralyses was spreading further. “I cannot even move properly! And that is *your* fault!”

 

“I already said I was sorry!” growled Glorfindel, his temper showing now that Erestor was uncooperative. They glared at each other, neither of them willing to lose this battle of wills.

 

In the end, it was Erestor who broke eye contact first, simply because he had to close his eyes against the pain. “Just leave me be,” he said in a resigned tone. “My healing ability will take care of it eventually. Just excuse me when Elrond asks for me.”

 

“Oh, no, I am going to get one of the twins to look you over.” Glorfindel marched out of the room; feeling frustrated and cross with Erestor. Getting the dark-haired Elf to agree to something was even harder than slaying a Balrog! He suddenly froze in his tracks, realizing something important. /By the Valar, he is *good* at keeping me at a distance and playing me! He probably anticipated my reaction and acted accordingly./ Erestor had succeeded in chasing him away from his rooms.

 

Tapping his foot on the floor, he took a moment to gather his wits. /Elrond must have had his reasons to make Erestor chief advisor… Scheming and manipulation are two qualities Erestor possesses in abundance. I wonder what other qualities he is hiding./ Grinning like a cat, he headed for the Healing House, deciding he would look upon Erestor as a challenge to be conquered.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Elrond couldn’t stop staring at his twin. He wanted to stay close to Elros for forever and never let him out of his sight again. But seeing Elros this close also triggered other memories. For long years they had slept in this way, holding each other tight and with arms and legs wrapped around each other. They had continued to sleep that way long after reaching majority. Spreading their wings, they took to traveling with Gil-galad’s army. At first, the other soldiers had been puzzled, seeing them sleep side by side, but their sleeping methods had become accepted once they had begun building a reputation as skilled fighters.

 

Then, one night, it had happened. Elros had kissed him on the lips with an unexpected expression of desire – lust even, clearly visible in his gray eyes. Elrond had been stunned, had pushed his twin away from him and had stared at Elros in shock. Mentally, he replayed their conversation that night.

 

“Why did you kiss me?” Staring at Elros in shock, he ran his fingertips along his lips, still feeling an echo of his twin’s lips against his. He was grateful that they had put their bedroll down away from the main camp, as Elros had expressed some need for privacy. At least now their comrades in arms hadn’t seen Elros kiss him.

 

Elros averted his eyes, looking depressed and disappointed. “I am sorry, gwenneth. I lost control. You looked so lovely and you were so close…”

 

Elrond shook his head, desperately hoping the conclusion he had reached was wrong. “Why? Tell me why you kissed me.” The sad expression in his brother’s dark gray eyes took him aback. There was so much love in them!

 

“I made a mistake. Can we please forget about it?” Elros seriously didn’t want to explain his actions to his twin, fearing the outcome if he did. He kept his eyes averted, hoping Elrond wouldn’t pressure him. In Elbereth’s name… What had possessed him to kiss his twin? He had controlled his emotions and desires so far, why had they now gotten the better of him?

 

“I cannot let this go,” said Elrond in a trembling tone. “You kissed me… on the lips!” Leaning in closer, he grabbed hold of his twin’s shoulders, shaking him. “And the look in your eyes tells me something I really don’t want to know!”

 

Elros closed his eyes, but knew it was too late, as the loving expression in them had given him away. “Do not do this. Please,” he said, shaking his head.

 

“Elros?” Elrond pleadingly stared at his brother. “Tell me why.” But did he really want to find out why there was such desire in his brother’s eyes?

 

“I am in love with you,” Elros eventually said in a choked tone, looking back into his twin’s eyes. Blinking, he tried to maintain eye contact with his twin, but it was hard to face Elrond now that he was finally revealing his true feelings. “It started shortly after we entered adulthood. I always tried to keep this from you, but… I don’t know what happened just now. I know I shouldn’t have done it.”

 

Elrond tried hard to truly understand his twin’s admission. “You are in love with me? But…” His features contorted. “Such a love is a monstrosity. You must fight it!”

 

Elros gasped, hearing Elrond’s condemning words. /A monstrosity; that is how he sees my love for him. I wish I had never spoken of it to him. I wish I had not kissed him. And what if he is right and it is a monstrosity? We are brothers! I should not feel that way about him./ Hanging his head in defeat, he sighed deeply. “I am sorry. I will never speak of my feelings for you again. You are right; I should fight them and not give in to them.”

 

Taking heart now that Elros saw how wrong his feelings were, Elrond moved closer again. He had distanced himself when hearing his twin’s admission, but now he felt the need to reestablish close contact. Elros’ feelings of misery brushed against his mind and he couldn’t bear knowing his twin was in misery. “We will face this together, gweniaur. I am sure you are strong enough to best these feelings.”

 

But the problem was that he didn’t want to best them. He wanted to give in to them, feel Elrond pressed close against him and to reclaim those lips, bruising them with passionate kisses. But Elrond had said this was wrong and he wouldn’t pressure his twin into accepting it. However, it would make things easier for him when he had to make his choice. He would choose mortality, as he didn’t want to live an immortal life in such torment, knowing his twin close, and yet so far away from him.

 

“We should go to sleep now,” said Elrond softly, gathering his brother in his arms. But this time it felt different, knowing Elros desired him in such a carnal way. Hesitantly, he lay down, face to face with his twin. There was a sense of discomfort between them that had never been there before. An invisible wall had been erected. And that barrier consisted of forbidden love.

 

“What are you thinking of, gwenneth?” Elros had woken some moments ago and seeing the distant look on his twin’s face, he had realized Elrond was lost in thought.

 

Elrond briefly trembled against his twin, eternally regretting his reaction to Elros’ kiss. That kiss had been the reason why they had drifted apart. When Elros had made his choice, Elrond had cried, knowing they would not be together until the end of Arda. Elros had left him alone and he had often wondered if things would have developed differently if he had accepted his brother’s love for him. Had the Valar now given him a second chance to make up for his past mistakes? Whatever the reason was for the Valar to return Elros to him, he was going to make the best of it. 

 

“Gwenneth? Did you hear me?” Elros was growing worried now that his twin wasn’t answering him. He rubbed Elrond’s back, hoping to reassure his twin by touch.

 

Realizing that he was worrying Elros, Elrond gave his brother an apologetic smile. “I was just remembering the past.”

 

“Those were not happy moments you were thinking of.” Elros didn’t want to remember their past; he had made one fatal mistake and was determined not to repeat it. He would keep silent about his feelings for his twin and never give Elrond a reason to look at him in such a way again. That expression still haunted him. It had been one of utter shock, disgust even, and he never wanted to see that expression again.

 

“Our past,” commented Elrond, relishing the fact that his twin was rubbing his back. He had missed this intimacy. “We shouldn’t dwell on the past.”

 

“We should look to the future instead.” Elros smiled and was utterly embarrassed when his stomach growled hungrily.

 

“I am remiss again,” said Elrond, grinning. “Lindir brought some refreshments, but you were already asleep by then.”

 

“I am awake now.” Elros regretted letting go of his twin, but the food was calling him closer.

 

Elrond rose from the bed, waited for his twin to join him, and then claimed his brother’s hand again. “I am not letting you get away again!”

 

Elros was pleased to hear those words. “I don’t plan on leaving you, gwenneth.”

 

Once they had seated themselves at the table and Elros had started eating the soup, Elrond asked, “How did you return to Arda? Did you talk to the Valar or…?”

 

“I saw Manwe,” said Elros thoughtfully. He had been overwhelmed when meeting the Vala and that sensation was quickly claiming him again. “Before he appeared I… I didn’t exist, I think. I remember releasing my last breath – and you were holding my hand, I still remember that – and the next moment… there was nothing.”

 

Shudders coursed through his twin’s body, urging Elrond to move closer. He released his brother’s hand so he could wrap an arm around Elros’ waist. “I cannot imagine what that must have been like.”

 

“I don’t want to dwell on it,” said Elros determinedly, biting off a chunk of bread and munching on it.

 

Elrond waited patiently for his twin to continue.

 

“When Manwe appeared I had no idea what was happening to me. It took time to get accustomed to being alive and conscious again. When I found my body had been restored to me, I grew even more confused.”

 

“What did Manwe say?” Elrond couldn’t help being curious; his brother had met the most powerful of the Valar!

 

“He was rather vague,” said Elros thoughtfully, now eagerly eying the omelet on the tray. It wasn’t long before he started eating it, together with more freshly baked bread and wine. After a moment, he continued, “I forgot how good food tasted!”

 

Elrond smiled dotingly. “You can have more later. Now tell me about Manwe.”

 

“As I said, he was rather vague.” Elros drank more of the wine, and now that he had finished the omelet, he started on the sausages. Seeing his brother’s amused look, he shrugged his shoulders and said, “I am hungry! It has been millennia since I ate last.”

 

“I can only imagine what it must be like for you, being alive again…” Elrond rested his hand on Elros’, thusly limiting his twin to the use of only one hand to feed himself. But Elros didn’t seem to mind, as he curled his fingers around his twin’s in approval. “Please continue to eat.”

 

Elros happily obliged him, finishing his meal with a juicy pear. “Manwe said I had some unfinished business on Middle-Earth and that he was sending me back for a reason.” Elros’ eyes momentarily narrowed. “He said it had something to do with you. Maybe you are in some sort of danger.”

 

“Danger?” Elrond didn’t think so. Yes, these were dangerous times with Sauron trying to regain possession of the One Ring, but he didn’t consider himself a serious target. Not now that the Ring had left Imladris. “I am in no danger.”

 

“We will see about that.” Elros pushed his now empty plate away from him. “Remind me to compliment the cook later.”

 

“I will.” Elrond gently squeezed Elros’ hand. “I still cannot believe you are really here.”

 

Elros arched an elegantly formed eyebrow. “I am here to stay. Manwe did say I would spend the rest of my life here – but he didn’t tell me if I am mortal or not…”

 

“What do you think? How do you feel? You were immortal once, you should remember how that felt.”

 

“That was a lifetime ago, gwenneth. Only time will tell. For now, I feel pleasantly full.” Looking out of the window, he found it was the dead of night. “Maybe you can show me around tomorrow?”

 

“Of course! And you have to meet my children!” Enthusiastically, Elrond nodded his head. “You have to meet Arwen and my sons.”

 

“Sons?” Elros laughed goodheartedly. “Don’t tell me you have twins!”

 

“I do, actually,” said Elrond, smiling. “Their names are Elladan and Elrohir and they reached majority long ago. They are skilled warriors now.”

 

Elros didn’t want to ask, but his curiosity got the better of him. “And their mother?” He immediately regretted asking that question as his twin’s gaze darkened with pain.

 

“I lost her. She sailed for Valinor after she was attacked by Orcs.” His voice trembled, revealing distress and sadness, which still lingered in his heart after so many centuries. “I still miss her.”

 

“The Valar have not been kind to you,” whispered Elros, compassionately rubbing his brother’s knuckles. “First you lose me and then her.”


”I lost Gil-galad as well.” Elrond bit his bottom lip, realizing what he had given away to his twin.

 

“Gil-galad?” Elros frowned.

 

“We were lovers once, but Sauron took his life, leaving me alone again.”

 

Elros buried his twin in a warm and tight hug. “I am so sorry you had to go through so much heartbreak.” His twin’s suffering was palpable to him through their connection, which once more existed and bound them. “You have lost so many loved ones.”

 

“But at least you are back now.” Elrond looked at his twin through a curtain of dark hair and a mist of tears. “Don’t ever leave me again, do you hear me?”

 

“I hear you,” said Elros soothingly. “And I will try to stay with you for the rest of my life. You won’t lose me again.” He only hoped the Valar would cooperate and not separate them.

 

Beta read by Sulien.

All remaining mistakes are mine.

 

Second Chances

Part 3

 

 

 

“Elladan? I need your expertise and healing skills.” Glorfindel marched into the room, relieved to have easily located one of the twins. Elladan arched an eyebrow and the Elda grinned. The twins had certainly taken after Elrond. It was hard to find any traces of Celebrian’s features in Elladan’s face. “Will you come with me?”

 

Elladan looked up from identifying bundles of dried healing herbs and questioningly looked at his former tutor. “Did you hurt yourself during sparring?” That would surprise him though. Glorfindel had yet to be defeated in battle.

 

“No, but I… I hurt someone else… accidentally, I might add!” Glorfindel gave Elladan a pleading look. “I ran into our chief councilor, literally. I knocked him off his feet and it appears he took a bad fall. He is unable to move.”

 

Elladan sighed. “Why does it have to be Erestor? He is probably the worst possible patient one can imagine!” He wasn’t looking forward to attending to his former mentor, knowing how deadly Erestor’s glares could be. As long as he could remember, Erestor had never set foot inside the Healing House. But he couldn’t really deny Glorfindel. If Erestor really needed his help, he should comply. “Let me gather some herbs.”

 

Glorfindel nodded, impatiently tapping his foot. “He appeared to be in a great amount of pain and he said he could barely move.” Recalling the pained expression in Erestor’s eyes, he added, “I think his injury is graver than he wants me to believe.”

 

Elladan had gathered his herbs and bandages and placed everything inside a bag. Signaling for Glorfindel to lead the way, he asked, “I wonder how he will react upon seeing me. I doubt he will be pleased. Does he even know you are bringing me along?”

 

Glorfindel’s brow furrowed. “I did not leave him a choice. I told him I would either take him to the Healing House, or bring you to his rooms.”

 

“Don’t tell me you are actually worried about him!” teased Elladan. Erestor had been a just and well-versed teacher, but the elder Elf had always maintained an emotional distance. Neither Arwen, nor he and his brother, thought Erestor cold or distant. But there had always been an air of authority to Erestor, which had made it hard to create an effective bond between them.

 

Glorfindel gave Elladan an awkward grin. “I would never admit to being worried about Erestor.” But in reality he was. Erestor had never shown any pain or discomfort before and the fact that the chief advisor had moaned in pain unnerved him.

 

Opening the door to Erestor’s rooms, he walked over to the bed, finding that Erestor hadn’t moved at all. Dark hair obscured part of the advisor’s face, but he could still tell the other Elf was in pain, seeing the fingers claw at the blanket. “Erestor? I am back and I brought Elladan with me. Are you still awake?”

 

Lowering himself onto his heels, he gingerly brushed some dark strands of hair away from Erestor’s face. Finding the eyes open and alert, he pulled back his hand, under the impression that Erestor thought him to be trespassing. However, he was shocked to find his fingertips come away wet with warm blood. “You are bleeding,” said Glorfindel when realization set in. “Why didn’t you tell me?” Erestor glowered at him, but this time Glorfindel didn’t allow the advisor to mentally push him away.

 

“Why should I?” Erestor briefly closed his eyes, feeling slightly dizzy.

 

“Let me examine you,” said Elladan, realizing Erestor’s injury was more serious than he had thought. Seeing Erestor’s glare shift toward him, he acted quickly, knowing his former tutor’s stare might make him reconsider this examination. “Glorfindel, we need to roll him onto his stomach.” That way Erestor also couldn’t glare at him any longer.

 

Erestor knew he was at their mercy and gnashed his teeth when the two Elves slowly rolled him over. The pain was still present, but numbing slightly. Vexed that he couldn’t look at Elladan and Glorfindel any longer, he sighed, letting the half-Elf proceed with his examination. Hands, which were surprisingly gentle, swept his dark hair aside to probe the injury.

 

Elladan frowned, finding the wound still bleeding. “Can you tell me what happened, Erestor? I know that Glorfindel crashed into you, but…”

 

“I fell,” whispered Erestor into his pillow, his voice barely audible. “My head hit something hard and sharp… The side table, I think.” He winced when Elladan’s fingers probed deeper.

 

“Glorfindel? Fetch me some tepid water? I need to clean the wound.” Elladan selected some clean bandages and began to wipe away the excess blood. “Where does the pain originate from?”

 

“My neck… and lower back…” Erestor bit his bottom lip, smothering a whimper that threatened to leave his lips.

 

Glorfindel returned from the bathroom, carrying a bowl filled with tepid water, which he placed beside Elladan on the floor.

 

Elladan, who had carefully seated himself on the edge of the bed, soaked one of the bandages in the water and began to clean up the blood in earnest. “The wound is deep and the paralyses probably very frightening, but your natural healing ability should undo the damage in a few days. Until then, you will be in some considerable discomfort. I would like to move you to the Healing House.”

 

“No… I want to stay here,” whispered Erestor, cursing his inability to shoo them from his rooms.

 

“In that case, I suggest someone sits with you until you are able to walk again.” Elladan had finished cleaning the wound and considered his next action. “I want to remove your robes so I can properly examine your back.”

 

Erestor cursed privately, for that meant they would have to roll him onto his side or back again in order to undo the buttons. “Why don’t you cut the fabric away? I refuse to move!” He didn’t want to go through that rush of agony again!

 

Glorfindel’s eyes widened slightly, stunned to hear Erestor’s remark. “What?” Erestor wore luxurious robes of thick, warm velvet, which were lined with cloth of gold. “And ruin a perfectly good robe?”

 

“I don’t care!” sneered Erestor. “I am not moving onto my back again!”

 

Glorfindel finally understood, realizing moving about would add to Erestor’s pain. “I will be careful,” he said, removing his dagger. Leaning in closer, he slid the blade down the long back, cutting the robes in two. He stepped back, giving Elladan space to work with.

 

Elladan pushed the robes aside, revealing a pale, yet elegantly curved back. Letting his fingers explore the damaged area, he had to apologize several times, hearing Erestor hiss in pain. “There is some considerable swelling down your spine. You need to rest, Erestor. You have to stay in bed for the next few days.”

 

“I will rest,” forced Erestor from between clenched teeth. He would do anything to aid his recovery. Shivers suddenly erupted over his body, making him moan in discomfort.

 

“What is amiss?” Elladan placed his hand palm down on Erestor’s back, but stayed carefully away from his patient’s injuries. The elder Elf felt cold to the touch. “Ah, my father once told me that an Elf who is suffering from an injury is sensitive to the cold.” Wondering how to get Erestor warm permanently, he grinned at Glorfindel. “You caused his injury, you keep him warm.”

 

“I am not joining him in bed!” said Glorfindel firmly. “And you are the healer. *You* take care of him!”

 

“I would never allow you into my bed!” sneered Erestor frustrated. Why couldn’t they just leave him alone?

 

Elladan decided to ignore Erestor’s comment. “I am expected back in the Healing House,” he pointed out to Glorfindel. “You caused his injuries, you take care of him.” Finding that Erestor’s shivers were growing worse, he covered the injured Elf with warm blankets. Opening his bag filled with healing herbs, he began to squeeze the juice out of some leaves. Gently, he brushed the dark hair aside and massaged the liquid into the skin, working his way down the damaged spine. “Glorfindel, you could fill several water skins with hot water. That would keep him warm. However, that does mean you have to refill them regularly.”

 

“I prefer warm water skins in my bed to Glorfindel,” said Erestor, trying hard not to cry out at Elladan’s touch. The half-Elf was gentle and cautious, but he still hurt.

 

Glorfindel’s eyes narrowed, wondering why Erestor had said that. Normally he would be tempted to react in a similar way, but he refused to play along. Now that he was going to look after the chief advisor, he wanted to keep the hostility to a minimum. “Elladan, is there anything else I can do?”

 

“Why don’t you make sure those water skins are filled whilst I sit with Erestor in your absence? I do think someone should stay with him at all times.” Elladan also wanted a moment alone with his former tutor.

 

Glorfindel nodded once, determined to carry out Elladan’s instructions. If Erestor needed to get warm, he would see to it.

 

“Erestor? Glorfindel is gone. Will you now tell me in how much pain you are really in?” Elladan moved strands of hair until he had a clear view of Erestor’s face.

 

Erestor stared at Elladan, grateful the half-Elf had waited to ask him until the Elda had left. “The pain is fading slightly, but I still hurt… badly.” He would never have admitted it to someone else, but he had helped raise Elladan and he had always trusted the twins. “Why did you make Glorfindel look after me? You know I don’t like him.”

 

Elladan gently tucked the blankets around Erestor’s shoulders. “I can help you out of your robes, if you want me to.”

 

Erestor had to admit he would be more comfortable without them, but… “I am so cold.” Shivers traveled down his spine, adding to his discomfort.

 

“The hot water skins will help and we can cover you with as many blankets as you want.”

 

“Do it now? Before he gets back?” Erestor didn’t want Glorfindel to see him naked. It wasn’t due to modesty; he just didn’t know how he could bear the blond’s gaze when looking upon him whilst he was in such a vulnerable state.

 

Elladan drew in a deep breath, knowing it was essential he didn’t jostle Erestor at all. It took him several minutes, but in the end, the cut robes slid onto the floor. “What position are you most comfortable in? Back? On your stomach? Your side?”

 

“Stomach, definitely,” whispered Erestor, slightly breathless after being moved about so much. Once he was settled as comfortable as possible, he looked at Elladan from over his shoulder. “Can’t you stay instead of Glorfindel?”

 

“I really think he should be the one looking after you. Maybe it will teach him that you are not as cold and haughty as he thinks. The two of you need to reach some sort of truce after millennia of giving each the cold shoulder. Seriously, Erestor, I have no idea why the two of you dislike one another that much.”

 

Erestor knew why, but kept silent. He couldn’t tell Elladan that he was in love with Glorfindel – actually had been in love with the Elda for millennia. “He just irritates me, Elladan.”

 

“Ah, I knew it!” Glorfindel stood in the doorway, precariously balancing several water skins in his arms. “I knew you found me irritating!”

 

“Well, you are,” teased Elladan, knowing he had to prevent an escalation. “Now bring those water skins over here.”

 

Shooting Erestor an annoyed look, Glorfindel deposited the water skins on the floor. One by one, he handed them to Elladan, who slipped them beneath the blankets, making sure they rested close against his patient’s body. “Better?”

 

Erestor sighed blissfully. “Yes, thank you.”

 

Glorfindel felt unappreciated. “I arranged for them!”

 

“Well, Elladan didn’t leave you much choice, now did he?” Erestor was growing tired of making these spiteful remarks, but seemed unable to stop himself. He just wanted Glorfindel out of his rooms so Elladan would have to stay instead.

 

Elladan, realizing what was going on, rose from the bed, gathered what was left of his herbal supply and walked toward the doorway. “He is all yours now, Glorfindel.”

 

Groaning, Glorfindel looked at Erestor, finding a stubborn – yet tired – expression in the dark-haired Elf’s eyes. “In what way did I ever offend the Valar? Why me?”

 

Erestor, too tired to react, closed his eyes and drifted off into reverie now that the healing herbs were taking effect. His last thought was how scary it was to have Glorfindel loose in his rooms.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Elladan decided it was best to inform his father that Erestor couldn’t perform his duties for the next few days and headed for Elrond’s rooms. Not bothering to knock – he never did – he entered the room and quickly located his father, who was standing near the window, looking outside. “Erestor will be indisposed for the next few days.”

 

Elros, taken by surprise by this young Elf who had entered so abruptly, turned to ask whom the other was, as he couldn’t envision Elrond being comfortable with people entering without knocking first. But when he looked at Elladan, the words remained stuck in his throat. Elrond’s features

– and thus his own – were prominently present in this Elf’s face and made it easier for him to reach the right conclusion. He was looking at one of his brother’s sons. “Indisposed?” He had no idea what the younger half-Elf was talking about, but he wanted this conversation to continue.

 

Elladan nodded once. “Apparently he took a bad fall and he needs to rest for several days. If you need someone to help you with the correspondence I am sure Elrohir or Lindir will be more than happy to assist you.”

 

/Elrohir… So this is Elladan./ He had envisioned their first meeting differently, though. “And where is your brother now?” Elladan gave him a questioning look and he hoped that he hadn’t aroused his nephew’s suspicion.

 

“He is leading today’s border patrol, but he should be back in a few hours.” Elrond was usually sharp and knew these things. Looking closer, he wondered about the odd expression in his father’s eyes. “Did you rest enough, Ada? You look—“ Elladan failed to finish his sentence when another dark-haired Elf entered the bedroom. His eyes nearly bulged from their sockets, seeing double. “Ada?” he said, but he wasn’t sure whom he was addressing.

 

Elrond stifled a smile, seeing the stunned disbelief on his son’s face. “Elladan? May I present my brother to you? This is Elros, my twin.” He moved to stand beside Elros, possessively claiming his twin’s hand so he could rub his brother’s fingers. “The Valar returned him to me.”

 

“I need to sit down…” Elladan swallowed hard, stumbled over to a chair and collapsed on it. “Your what?”

 

“My twin brother,” explained Elrond patiently. “Believe me, I was as shocked as you are now when I found him standing in my study. But this really is my brother.”

 

Elros stayed calm, although it was hard, as he wanted to reassure Elladan that it was the truth, but he judged it better for his twin to do so. He squeezed Elrond’s fingers in return, hoping his twin would find a way to convince Elladan.

 

“Your brother? Your twin?” Elladan’s big eyes continued to stare at Elros. “But he died! You told us that he had chosen mortality and died centuries ago!”

 

“I know I did,” replied Elrond, “But Elros returned to me.” Sighing, he leaned against Elros for support. “Imagine you losing Elrohir and then finding he has been returned to you.”

 

“I cannot imagine such a thing.” Elladan didn’t *dare* imagine such a thing. “Are you really… Elros?” He studied the elder Elf’s face and found it impossible to identify any differences in appearance between them. That was why he had assumed Elros was his father when he had entered the room.

 

“Aye, I really am he. Manwe allowed me to return to Middle-Earth – to my twin to be exact – and I am eternally grateful for his gift.”

 

Staring at Elros, Elladan wondered about the fact that even their voices sounded identical. He pushed himself onto his feet again and advanced on the two elder Elves. “You are my uncle.”

 

“Yes, I reckon I am,” said Elros, smiling smugly. Slowly, he raised a hand and caressed Elladan’s face. “I see a lot of my brother in you, Elladan.”

 

Elladan actually blushed when he smiled. “I will take that as a compliment,” he said, giving his father a wink. “My, this could become embarrassing. I never realized how hard it is to keep identical twins apart.” To him, there were great differences between Elrohir and he, but looking at Elrond and Elros, he was hard pressed to tell them apart.

 

“I realize this must come as a shock to you,” said Elros, lowering his hand again. “It was a shock to me as well. I never expected to be allowed to return to Arda – to my brother.” Elros took a step away from Elladan, returning his personal space to the younger half-Elf.

 

“Manwe? Manwe was instrumental in returning you to my father?” Elladan easily identified the expression in his father’s eyes, which was one of utter bliss and happiness. He had never fully realized how much Elrond had suffered when losing his twin, but he was beginning to understand now. “I swear I cannot tell you apart!”

 

“We’ve heard that one before,” said Elrond and Elros simultaneously. Looking at each other, they smiled warmly.

 

Elladan had never seen anything like this before; it almost seemed Elrond and Elros were… fusing together. He simply didn’t know how else to phrase it. There was confidence there and a complete understanding of the other, which he had never managed with Elrohir. He even envied them for it for a tiny moment, but then his common sense took over. “I cannot wait for Elrohir and Arwen to meet you.”

 

“I am looking forward to meeting them as well,” said Elros, genuinely interested in getting to know his twin’s other children. Realizing that Elrond still had a tight hold on his hand, he raised the limb and cradled it against his chest, not giving the gesture any thought as it came natural to him.

 

Elladan smiled, seeing the way Elros cherished having Elrond close. It had been centuries since he had seen his father happy. When Celebrian had left, their whole world had fallen apart and he had even feared for his father’s sanity. He liked what he was seeing now – this tight connection between them. “Uncle, may I welcome you properly?” Elros raised an eyebrow in the same manner his father did, noticed Elladan, when he slowly embraced the elder half-Elf.

 

Elrond laughed softly, seeing the surprised look on his twin’s face.

 

“They are as affectionate as you are, Elrond,” whispered Elros softly, returning his twin’s smile. “This feels like coming home.”

 

“You are home,” said Elrond, unable to stand back. The moment his son released Elros, Elrond moved in to hug his brother, determined to keep his twin close until the end of Arda.

 

Standing back, Elladan watched them and slowly a frown formed on his face. But it wasn’t a frown revealing disapproval or worry, it was a frown that signaled his surprise, seeing the affection and oneness when they held each other close. And it made him wonder if there was more to them than met the eye.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Glorfindel was bored. Now that Elladan had ‘sentenced’ him to sitting with Erestor, he couldn’t really do much. His glance therefore wandered over to the books on the shelves, thinking he might read one of those just to keep him occupied. Erestor surely wouldn’t mind, would he?

 

Soundlessly, he left his chair and began to look through the books. Some, he immediately put away, as they were on politics and warfare and he wasn’t in the right mood for that. Then he happened upon one about Gondolin’s history and he sat down and began reading it. He was surprised at finding such a volume in Erestor’s private rooms. Elrond probably didn’t know it was in his chief advisor’s possession or the half-Elf would have found a way to ‘acquire’ it for his library.

 

Feelings of melancholy awoke in him as he read about Turgon and the downfall of Gondolin. He had been happy in Gondolin, surrounded by his family and friends and being together with his lover Ecthelion. He had lost everything when the city had fallen – not to mention he had lost his life, courtesy of one very pissed off Balrog.

 

Putting the book down on the side table, he closed his eyes, remembering his past. He had been Captain of his house – the House of the Golden Flower – and had commanded part of the King’s forces. He missed that time – the adventure and fun he had shared with Ecthelion and his other friends. Oh, he enjoyed living in Imladris and had found a new home with Elrond’s family, but he still felt lonely at times – even out of place.

 

Looking at the volume on the side table, he wondered how Erestor had managed to get his hands on it. This was valuable documentation, worthy of being archived in Elrond’s library. His gaze shifted to his charge, finding Erestor’s eyes alert. When had the dark-haired Elf woken up? “I hope you do not mind me reading one of your books, but I was bored.”

 

“I couldn’t care less about your ‘activities’, Glorfindel,” hissed Erestor from between clenched teeth. He hadn’t wanted to sneer at the blond, but his discomfort was not improving his mood. He was cold again, but refused to ask Glorfindel for help.

 

Glorfindel’s eyes narrowed, as he was about to make a spiteful remark in turn, but he held back and walked over to Erestor’s bed instead. “Are you still warm or is it time to refill the water skins?”

 

Erestor briefly considered ignoring Glorfindel, but realized how foolish that would be. “They need refilling. The water has grown cold.”

 

Glorfindel arched an eyebrow at that mellow and honest answer, which he hadn’t expected at all. Erestor was already buried beneath a pile of blankets, but the fabric did little to keep the dark-haired Elf warm now that his healing ability was using up most of his energy. What Erestor needed was body heat, but he had already told Elrohir that he wasn’t joining his charge in bed. That was where he drew the line! “I will refill them,” said Glorfindel, sliding his hands beneath the blankets to extract the water skins. Erestor tensed up when one of his fingers accidentally brushed the raven-haired Elf’s thigh. Obviously his charge didn’t like being touched and he quickly pulled back, taking most of the water skins with him. “I will be right back.”

 

“No need to hurry…” Erestor bit his bottom lip, wondering why he had said that. Right now, he depended on Glorfindel to take care of him and the blond was making an effort to be sociable, keeping back his usual comments. “I apologize. I shouldn’t have said that.”

 

“I wonder why you did,” said Glorfindel, thoughtfully, giving Erestor a probing look before leaving for the kitchens to fill the skins with hot water.

 

Glorfindel’s words left Erestor with a bad taste in his mouth. Since the Elda had accidentally ran into him, Glorfindel had done his best to help. The blond had even held back from returning spiteful remarks, so why was he still being mean to the warrior? /I cannot allow him to see my true feelings. It is best to keep him at a distance. But that doesn’t mean I cannot act politely toward him./

 

Knowing it would take Glorfindel several minutes to make his trip to the kitchen and back again, Erestor had time to think about his past actions. If only Glorfindel liked him a little bit, then they might have been friends. But the blond had rejected him many millennia ago, and what hurt most was that Glorfindel didn’t even seem to remember doing it. Or was Glorfindel just pretending he had forgotten? Erestor wasn’t sure what would hurt the most.

 

When Glorfindel eventually returned, he found Erestor brooding and avoiding his glance. It made him wonder what had happened during his absence. “Did the pain grow worse?”

 

This time, Erestor thought his reply through before answering the blond. “No, the pain is mostly gone. I just feel numb and cold.” He could tell that his answer pleased Glorfindel, as a smile slowly manifested on the Elda’s face. “I still cannot move much though.”

 

Glorfindel was pleased with Erestor’s sudden change in attitude – and grateful as well. “I will slip the water skins back in. These should warm you properly.” He kept a close eye on the hurting Elf and his smile broadened slightly, realizing Erestor wasn’t flinching away from him when his fingers accidentally brushed his leg. “I never knew you owned that many books about Gondolin.”

 

Erestor bit his bottom lip, reminding himself to act carefully. “I am a scholar as well as an advisor and thus I am interested in history and lore.” He couldn’t tell Glorfindel the truth; that he had lived in Gondolin and had loved the blond from afar, before and after the warrior had rejected him. That he still loved him in silence, always craving a kind word or touch, but knowing he wouldn’t get it. “I have many interests and Gondolin’s history is fascinating.”

 

Glorfindel was under the impression that Erestor was keeping something from him, but he didn’t push his charge. Once the water skins were in place again, he took a step away from the bed. “Are you a bit more comfortable and warmer now?”

 

“A bit.” But the warm skins couldn’t do away with the cold in his bones. What he really craved was lying in Glorfindel’s arms, pressing his body against the blond’s. But he couldn’t have it – ever. “I regret that you are stuck with nursing me back to health.”

 

“No, Elladan is right. I caused your injury so it is only fair that I take care of you.” Glorfindel returned to his seat, sat down and studied his charge. “Have you ever been in Gondolin, Erestor?”

 

Erestor briefly felt lost. He didn’t want to lie to Glorfindel, but telling the truth was dangerous. “Yes, I have seen her beauty.”

 

Glorfindel’s eyes flared with pleasure. “And you never told me? We could have reminisced about the beautiful city and her inhabitants!”

 

Erestor swallowed hard, realizing he had said too much. “I only visited there for a short while.” Which was a blatant lie; he had lived at Turgon’s court as the King’s advisor. “But we can talk about Gondolin when I feel better. I must admit to growing tired again.”

 

Glorfindel nodded in understanding. “’Tis a healing sleep and I should not keep you awake. We will talk some more later.” He was surprised to find that he enjoyed talking to the advisor, something he had thought impossible. But then again, Erestor’s demeanor had changed since his trip to the kitchen, which made looking after him much easier. “Is there anything else I can do for you?”

 

“Elrond should know that I will be bedridden for the next few days,” mumbled Erestor, slowly slipping back into reverie.

 

“I think Elladan already took care of that.” Glorfindel hoped Erestor was comfortable and would sleep for the next few hours. It would greatly aid his recovery process. “Anything else?”

 

Erestor, whose carefully engendered caution was slipping due to his near sleep, whispered, “Yes… you… stay…”

 

Glorfindel’s eyes widened at hearing that admission. /Stay? He wants *me* to stay with him? Me?/ Frowning, he wondered what had made Erestor say that. Picking up his book again, he continued to read, regularly checking on his charge to make sure Erestor remained sound asleep.

 

Beta read by Sulien.

All remaining mistakes are mine.

 

Second Chances

Part 4

 

 

 

“Lindir? Would you please make sure my entire household is assembled in the Hall of Fire before dinner? I have an announcement to make and I want everyone present.” Elrond noticed the puzzled expression on Lindir’s face, now that the white-haired Elf was staring at Elros. He sympathized with Lindir, knowing Elros’ presence raised many questions, but he wanted to explain his twin’s return to his household once only. “And please locate my daughter. I need to speak with her.”

 

Lindir nodded; he would carry out these instructions, realizing his Lord would explain in time. “I will locate Arwen first and then instruct the staff.” He left the half-Elf’s study, still wondering about the identical Elf who had been sitting on Elrond’s bed.

 

“I think I scared him,” said Elros thoughtfully. “I saw the way he looked at me.”

 

“That is because he doesn’t know how to explain your presence here. Once they know the Valar returned you to me, he will be as delighted as I am.” Elrond gave his twin a stunning smile.

 

Elros however, noticed something about the way Elrond continued to phrase that. /Returned to *me*. Not to Arda, or his family. No, I was returned to *him*./ He actually loved hearing the possessiveness in his twin’s voice. Millennia ago he had hoped to hear it, but back then Elrond had distanced himself, probably uncertain about the attraction Elros felt for him, but that seemed to have changed. “Tell me more about your daughter, now that I am going to meet her.”

 

“She is the last gift Celebrian left me. She inherited my dark looks, but her features are Celebrian’s. I love her dearly and already regret having to give her hand in marriage to Estel one day.” He had seen the future and knew what would come to pass. His heart grew saddened, knowing Arwen would choose a mortal life as Elros had.

 

Elros didn’t know who Estel was and why this pained his twin, but he felt Elrond’s anguish as if it were his own. “Each of us needs to walk their own path, gwenneth. You cannot stand in the way of destiny.”

 

“But she will choose a mortal life, like you did,” said Elrond, hoping his twin would understand. “I will lose her.”

 

Elros leaned in closer and placed the palm of his right hand against Elrond’s chest, covering the area beneath which his brother’s heart was beating. “You cannot lose someone when they live on in your heart. I know you felt like you had lost me, but I was always with you – here.” He gently rubbed Elrond’s chest through the fabric of the robes.

 

Swallowing hard, Elrond stared into his twin’s gray eyes. “You did leave me, but you are right. You remained alive in my heart.” He folded his arms around his brother and hugged him close. “When you told me you had chosen mortality my world collapsed. Why did you do it?”

 

“I didn’t have a choice,” whispered Elros in his twin’s ear. “I knew my destiny lay in the world of Man. That I had things to accomplish and certain events to set into motion.”

 

“Was that it? Or was there another reason?” Elrond lifted swimming eyes to meet his brother’s gaze. “You made your choice after you kissed me.”

 

Elros shivered, dreading this topic. He had to steer Elrond away from it. “Let us forget that ever happened. You made it very clear that your heart didn’t lie with me and I always respected that.”

 

Elrond cringed; that was not the answer he had wanted to hear. Looking into Elros’ eyes, he still saw lingering hurt there. His reaction millennia ago had greatly pained his twin. “I am sorry I hurt you. That was never my intention, but I was shocked.”

 

“Don’t worry about something that happened in the past. There is nothing we can do to change that now. I cannot take back that kiss or my admission and you cannot take back your reaction. I was wrong, not you. I should never have kissed you, let alone tell you I loved you.”

 

Elrond felt at the brink of a revelation and he just had to ask – had to know. “Do you still love me?”

 

Elros involuntarily sucked in his breath. “Don’t ask me that.” For he couldn’t lie to his twin.

 

“Ada?” Arwen walked into the room, and then froze in her tracks – stunned. She placed one hand against the wall to ground herself. Staring at the two identical Elves, a strange sensation swept through her. She was hard-pressed to find any differences between them, but in the end she focused on the eyes. Smiling, she identified her father, reading the love in Elrond’s gray orbs. Walking toward Elrond, she cocked her head questioningly. “I reckon there is something you need to tell me?” She had known something was amiss when Lindir had urged her to join her father as quickly as possible.

 

“Arwen, I want you to meet my twin, Elros.” Elrond’s heart thundered nervously, wondering how his daughter would react to this revelation. He loosened the hold he had on his twin and gathered Elros’ hand in his. “Manwe allowed him to return to Arda.”

 

Staring at Elros in curious surprise, Arwen searched her uncle’s face. “Is it really you?” Seeing Elros nod, her heart rejoiced. Her father had seldom mentioned Elros, but when he had, his voice had always carried a tone of regret and pain. She smiled at Elros, approaching him to give him a hug. “Welcome back, uncle.”

 

Accepting her embrace, he blinked at Elrond, relieved this introduction had gone so well. Arwen felt warm and soft in his arms, but that didn’t fool him, having seen determination and a strong spirit in her eyes. “Thank you, pen-neth. Finding my brother has fathered such kind children warms my heart.”

 

Elrond beamed with pride, hearing his twin’s approval. Joining in the hug, he wrapped his arms around his daughter and brother. But in the back of his head, he replayed Elros’ answer to the question of whether his twin still loved him, realizing his brother had never answered that question. /If only Arwen had arrived a few minutes later./ Now he had to wait for an appropriate moment to bring up the question again.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Studying his staff, Elrond realized the news had traveled fast. All eyes were directed at Elros, who stood beside him, and murmurs traveled through the Hall of Fire. “This is my twin, Elros, who has returned to Middle-Earth with the blessing of Manwe himself. He will live here – with us.”

 

Elros’ eyes briefly narrowed; he couldn’t remember discussion his plans with his twin. Elrond had automatically assumed he would stay here. And that was what he wanted – really wanted – but could he bear the ever present pain of being so close to the one he loved, knowing Elrond didn’t love him back in that way? How long would he last? Elrond’s rejection had driven them apart in the first place.

 

“As my brother, he will hold a place of respect in this household.” Elrond saw most of his servants nod, easily accepting Elros as part of their household. Raising a hand, he signaled for his staff to follow him to the set tables so they could eat dinner.

 

“Please sit beside me,” whispered Elrond, gesturing for Elros to sit to his right, whilst Arwen took her place at his left. Realizing Elladan wasn’t present yet, he wondered what was keeping his oldest son.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Elros felt at peace, eating dinner and watching his twin and Arwen. It was amazing how much Elladan and she had taken after their father. Even though Celebrian had left her family, they had obviously remained a tight unit, as the love the half-Elves bore each other was palpable, and he rejoiced at the fact that they had accepted and welcomed him into their family as well.

 

If only he could keep Elrond from asking more questions about that kiss and his admission. He had committed that foolish act millennia ago and thought Elrond had dealt with it. But apparently his twin hadn’t, as Elrond had inquired about his feelings earlier. He hoped that he could keep his love hidden from his twin – not wanting to confront his brother with his inappropriate feelings. If he really wanted to be happy here – and keep Elrond happy as well – he had to bury his feelings forever.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

“Elrohir, you are not going to believe this!” Elladan marched into the rooms they shared, watching his younger twin slip into clean clothes now that Elrohir had been able to wash up. Elrohir had been on patrol these last few days and seemed relieved to be home again. Sitting down on the bed, Elladan caught his brother’s glance, hoping he had piqued his twin’s curiosity.

 

“Pray tell me what has happened then,” said Elrohir in a fatigued tone. Although everyone was getting ready for dinner, he just wanted to catch some sleep. But his father always appreciated it when he joined them for dinner, so he would make a brief appearance tonight. He saw the mischievous spark in his brother’s eyes and wondered about it, but he also knew Elladan would tell him shortly. His twin was bad at keeping secrets; Elladan always had been.

 

“Imladris has a new inhabitant,” hinted Elladan wickedly. “And he bears a perfect resemblance to our dear father. His name is Elros.”

 

Elrohir frowned deeply, wondering why his twin was acting this irrationally. “Elrohir, Elros died. He was mortal.”

 

“That is true, but Manwe sent him back!” Elladan rose from the bed and advanced on his brother, grabbing hold of his shoulders. “You will understand when you see him at our father’s side.”

 

The deep frown remained on Elrohir’s face. “Elladan, this cannot be.”

 

“Glorfindel was allowed to return to Arda, why not Elros?”

 

“Because Glorfindel belonged to the Firstborn and Elros was mortal.” Elrohir calmly held his brother’s gaze. “This Elf is an imposter.”

 

“Ada doesn’t believe so.”

 

“Ada never truly recovered from the grief of losing Elros! He would gladly accept his twin’s return, even if it is only an imposter!”

 

“You are wrong, trust me. You will understand when you see them together. There is a deep connection between them, one we never quite managed.” Elladan moistened his lips, hoping to convince his twin. “Promise me you won’t step into the Hall of Fire filled with suspicion and hostility. Give Elros a chance to prove himself to you.” Elladan gently rubbed his twin’s fingers. “Do it for me.”

 

Elladan had never been able to deny his twin and nodded his head. “I will try.”

 

“Good, that is all I am asking for.” Elladan held his twin’s stare for one more moment and then nodded contentedly. Elrohir would keep his promise and seeing Elrond and Elros together would take away his twin’s doubts.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Elros looked up from his plate, feeling wary eyes probe his form. The twins stood in the doorway. He easily identified Elladan by the smile on his face, but the younger twin’s lips formed a narrow line, obviously displeased. He could understand though. Both twins struck him as protective of their father and they would make sure Elrond wouldn’t be emotionally hurt.

 

Elrond had noticed their arrival as well and signaled for them to take their seats. Elrond easily caught the expression in his oldest son’s eyes and wondered what to do – what to say. After clearing his throat, Elrond said, “Elrohir, I gather your brother already told you about my twin?”

 

“He did.” Elrohir’s eyes narrowed. “Are you really Elros?”

 

Elros understood Elrohir’s need for confirmation and said, “Yes, I am. I realize this is hard to accept, but I really am Elros. The Valar gave me a second chance and your father has invited me to stay.”

 

Elrohir focused on Elros, trying to find out if the Elf was being sincere. When his father placed a hand on Elros’ arm, he thought he saw something

-- a soft glow, originating from their point of contact. Instinctively he sensed their connection, a deep link that bound them. Elladan had been right then; this really was Elros.

 

His gaze shifted from Elros’ face to his father’s and Elrohir searched the gray eyes, which were definitely radiant with happiness and bliss. /I cannot imagine the pain Ada must have gone through when Elros chose mortality. It is amazing that he didn’t fade back then. If Elladan ever left me…/ But they had already discussed their future and had agreed to belong to the Firstborn when their time came. Elladan and he would never be separated. He couldn’t help but wonder though why Elros had chosen to go a separate way from his twin.

 

Elrond was growing worried now that Elrohir remained silent. “He speaks the truth. Our bond came alive again the moment he entered my life.”

 

“You are happy to have him back,” said Elrohir thoughtfully.

 

“Very happy. I am finally reunited with the other half of my soul. You have no idea how empty I felt without him.” Elrond’s eyes sought out his twin’s.

 

“I am sorry my decision hurt you,” said Elros sincerely, “But I didn’t have a choice. My destiny lay elsewhere and you survived without me. You married Celebrian and sired these lovely children, who do you much credit. What else could you have wished for?”

 

“I wanted you in my life,” said Elrond in a trembling voice. “I wanted you close.”

 

Realizing his younger twin was growing emotional, Elros reassuringly squeezed Elrond’s fingers. “You have me now. I am close.”

 

Elrond swallowed convulsively, plagued by the question if Elros was mortal or not. Elros seemed ethereal to him, wholly Elven, but could he be sure? “Promise you won’t ever leave me again.”

 

“Not willingly,” promised Elros, wishing he could kiss his brother in another way than just press a chaste kiss onto his twin’s brow. Even after all these millennia, he still wanted to taste Elrond’s lips again and to press his brother’s body against his. /But I cannot have him. Never./ And he locked his feelings away again, making sure they weren’t palpable on his face.

 

But one person caught that look of desire and need on Elros’ face. Elladan, already wondering about the tight connection which Elrond and Elros shared, now wondered what else bound the elder twins. Was it more than brotherly love? /And if it is, how do I feel about it?/ The suspicion that there was a mutual attraction between his father and Elros had occurred to him before, but he hadn’t allowed it to fully register with him… until now.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Elros was rather relieved when dinner was over. The twins had been staring at him for most of the evening, whilst Arwen and Elrond had tried to fill any awkward silences with pleasant chatter. But now the time had come to retire for the night and he was curious to find out if he would be given guest quarters or if Elrond expected him to move into his rooms. Not that he would mind, and his younger twin still had a rather tight hold on his hand.

 

It was apparent that Elrond still expected him to vanish and, being honest, so did Elros himself. It was definitely odd to be alive again and now that he had been reunited with his twin, he didn’t ever want to leave Elrond again. But was that what the Valar had intended when they had restored him to life?

 

Elrond rose to his feet next to him and Elros followed because of his twin’s tight grip. Several pairs of curious eyes fixed on them, but his twin ignored them, announcing they were leaving.

 

Arwen and the twins also rose from their chairs. Studying Arwen, Elros found she was genuinely pleased and interested in learning more about him. The same applied to Elrohir, who had apparently let go of his suspicions during the evening. Now it was Elladan who was eying him questioningly, but he detected no malice in the half-Elf’s gaze, just a deep curiosity and wondering. He decided to address it once he got a moment alone with Elladan and let it go for now, feeling Elrond’s hand settle at the small of his back.

 

Elrond was touching him a lot more than he had before he had died. Especially those last few centuries had been pure torment with his younger brother keeping any physical contact between them to an absolute minimum. Elrond had acted like even the smallest touch would trigger an amorous reaction on Elros’ part. /I accepted that you don’t love me in that way, gwenneth. Distancing yourself from me wasn’t necessary./ Had his younger brother finally realized that? He probably had, considering the fact that Elrond constantly instigated a touch or a caress.

 

Leaning into the touch, he fell into step beside his younger brother, curious to find out what Elrond’s next step would be.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Elrond faced a dilemma. As a host, he knew it was only proper to offer Elros his own quarters, but he was hesitant to let his brother out of his sight. He wanted – no, needed – Elros close constantly. After nervously clearing his throat, he said, “I don’t think Lindir prepared any guest rooms for you yet. Would you mind staying in my chambers tonight?” Not so subtle, but it would get his point across. When Elros’ eyes met his, he read understanding in them. Elros knew about his feelings, and his needs, for which he was grateful.

 

“I will keep you company tonight, gwenneth, if you don’t mind sharing your bed with me, for I refuse to sleep on the floor! Now that I am back on Arda I want to sleep in a proper bed!”

 

Elrond laughed warmly. “My bed is big enough for the two of us.” A moment later he sobered slightly, realizing how close to him Elros would sleep. The last time they had slept that way had been before Elros’ admission. He wondered what tonight would be like.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

“Stop moving about so much, gwenneth! I cannot sleep!” Elros had rolled onto his right side and was now staring at Elrond’s back. His younger brother had been right; the bed *was* big enough, but the constant tossing and turning on Elrond’s part was making it hard for him to fall asleep.

 

“It just feels… odd,” mumbled Elrond, slowly turning onto his other side so he was facing his twin. “I haven’t shared my bed with anyone for so long. I must have gotten used to sleeping alone.”

 

The sadness that colored Elrond’s words made Elros reach out. Gently, he stroked his brother’s brow and then let his fingers run through the loose mane. “I loved my wife, and my children,” volunteered Elros in a shaky tone, “But each night when I went to sleep, I missed having you close, gwenneth.”

 

Elrond gave his twin a shaky smile. “I am still afraid you will be gone when I open my eyes in the morning.” His hand found Elros’ and he interlinked their fingers. “I cannot help myself. I need to touch you.”

 

Elros smiled reassuringly and gently squeezed his twin’s fingers. He was somewhat hesitant to offer to hold his brother like he had when they had been Elflings and wondered about Elrond’s possible reactions to such an offer. The last thing he wanted was for Elrond to retreat behind a wall again, shutting him out. Should he take the risk? Or not?

 

Their tight connection gave Elrond a brief glimpse at his twin’s thoughts, sensing Elros’ hesitance to take the initiative in this. “Maybe you could hold me? I would love to sleep that way again. It seems a life time ago.”

 

“For me, a life time did pass by,” mumbled Elros absentmindedly. He freed his hand of Elrond’s hold, opened his arms and invited his brother to move into them, which Elrond promptly did. However, he wasn’t prepared for the sensory overload that now hit him. Elrond’s scent invaded his nostrils. Strands of hair teased against his face and Elrond’s warm body pressed back against his, settling down in the embrace. Spooned behind Elrond, he embraced his younger brother tightly. “I will still be here when you wake up. I cannot possibly leave without you noticing me get up.”

 

Elrond grinned, being reminded of the fact that Elros had always acted as his ‘big’ brother, who had to protect and reassure him. Even though Elros was only a few minutes older, his twin took his responsibility and duties extremely seriously. It also made him wonder if Elladan felt the same way where Elrohir was concerned.

 

One thing he could definitely rule out where his sons were concerned was the possibility of them being in love with each other. Elladan had displayed a great interest in Rumil the last time Celeborn had visited and he had definitely seen Elrohir making eyes at Orophin. It would be fortunate if the two brothers returned their feelings, but he hadn’t made any inquiries yet, knowing his sons would tell him when the time was right.

 

Elros simply enjoyed holding his twin close. The familiar sensation almost overwhelmed him, causing tears to form in his eyes and he felt grateful that Elrond was facing away from him. Instinctively, he placed a chaste kiss on the top of his brother’s head.

 

Elrond smiled, pleased, when a kiss was bestowed onto his hair and he snuggled closer, pulling his twin’s arms as tightly as possible around his frame. “May Elbereth grant you sweet dreams tonight, gweniaur.”

 

“And may yours be equally sweet,” whispered Elros in a shaky tone. Holding each other close, both half-Elves finally managed to fall asleep.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

A hungry growl, originating from Erestor’s stomach, immediately drew Glorfindel’s attention. His charge had slept peacefully for most of the night, but now seemed to be waking up, judging by his eyes beginning to blink. He was eager to find out if Erestor had already regained some mobility. It had to frustrate the chief advisor to be unable to move and be confined to bed. Leaving his chair, he walked over to the bed and carefully sat down on the side. “How do you fare this morning?” He closely monitored Erestor’s reaction, reading confusion and puzzlement in the large, dark eyes.

 

“What are *you* doing in my rooms?” Upon awakening, his mind was still blank and he managed to slightly move away from Glorfindel, not fully realizing he was actually moving again.

 

Glorfindel frowned at the words, but was relieved to see Erestor pushing away from him. Some mobility had been returned to the dark-haired Elf then! Good! But why was Erestor moving away from him? “You had an accident, remember? And I am taking care of you because it was my fault. Please don’t tell me you have amnesia now as well.”

 

Erestor blinked one more time; his memories slowly returning to him. “You ran into me.” Glorfindel had caused him to bang his head against the sharp end of a table, leaving him nearly paralyzed. Yes, he remembered now. He also remembered that they had been getting along the last time they had talked and that he had been trying not to be sarcastic when the blond was close. “I remember. I have no amnesia, Glorfindel.”

 

The frown on his brow deepened. Erestor had never before spoken his name in such a companionable tone and he replied softly in return. “I am glad for that. Forgetting parts of your life is frustrating.”

 

That statement caught Erestor’s attention. Now that he remembered that Glorfindel only wanted to help, he relaxed and even gave in to his curiosity. “You speak as one who knows from personal experience.”

 

Suddenly feeling nervous, Glorfindel cleared his throat. “I would rather not talk about this.”

 

But Erestor wouldn’t have it. “Did you suffer from amnesia once?”

 

Sighing, the blond gave in. “I still suffer from it.” He wasn’t sure if he wanted the advisor to know, but it looked like Erestor wasn’t giving him a choice. Seeing the dark eyes grow large, he shrugged his shoulders once. “After my rebirth some memories never returned to me.”

 

Erestor raised an eyebrow. “Tell me more.” Although he had trained himself not to act compassionately around the one he secretly loved, he failed to keep the concern out of his voice, something that Glorfindel distinctly noticed, judging by the surprised expression in his azure eyes.

 

Glorfindel felt awkward, seeing the genuine interest and concern in Erestor’s eyes. It took him aback, and he had to glance down for a moment. He cleared his throat to cover up his surprise at seeing it. “That is why I was so delighted to hear you had been in Gondolin. My life there only exists in shards of memories. I remember Turgon and Ecthelion – and that bloody Balrog of course – but so many things faded from my memory! Knowing I lived through some events, but being unable to remember them is frustrating.” His gaze darted over to the books and scrolls on Gondolin. “When I saw those I wanted to read them all and I did make a start in doing so, but…” His eyes hesitantly searched Erestor’s, “You have been there. You could talk to me about the city and its inhabitants, maybe trigger more memories.”

 

Erestor swallowed hard; had Glorfindel really forgotten about him completely? The fact that they had known each other in Gondolin? That he had embarrassed himself by expressing his wish to court Glorfindel in order to find out if they were suited for each other? Hoping they would bind in the end? /Glorfindel laughed at me, telling me I wasn’t his type and that such a union would be ill-fated./ Being rejected in such a manner had hurt tremendously and he had suffered from heartbreak since, but he had quickly realized that Glorfindel would never fall for an advisor. The blond had spent his days in Ecthelion’s company and that of his men. He had never been able to compete with them, being one of Turgon’s trusted advisors just wasn’t good enough for Glorfindel to even consider him in that way.

 

Having been rejected was the very reason why he had given Glorfindel the cold shoulder since that very first day the blond had arrived to train the twins. When he had looked into Glorfindel’s blue eyes that day, his heart had ached, realizing the Valar had restored the blond to his old form. Those were the eyes he had fallen in love with millennia ago. Those were the high cheekbones and the golden tresses, which he had wanted to caress, but Glorfindel had made it very clear that he wasn’t interested in him. So he had retaliated with cold indifference. He always acted politely in Glorfindel’s presence, but never touched the blond, never said a kind word. His heart had been hurt too deeply to forgive the Elda for it now.

 

Oh, he still remembered the day Gondolin had been attacked. He had seen Ecthelion being burned and the mayhem and chaos erupting all over the city. Once he had realized it was everyone for themselves, he had tried to find Glorfindel, hoping they could make an escape together. But he should have known better. When he finally found Glorfindel, the blond was breaking off from the escort of the refugees to battle a Balrog, single handedly, in order to keep the creature from harming the refugees and to give them time to flee. He had witnessed Glorfindel’s final battle and had watched his love fall toward his death, taking the Balrog with him. Horrified at witnessing these events, he had stumbled along to join the few Elves that had managed to escape the burning city, but his heart had frozen, seeing Glorfindel die.

 

“Erestor? Erestor!” Glorfindel had grown worried, seeing the distant and pained expression in the dark eyes. He had no idea what was going on with his charge, but he deemed it best to act now, before Erestor slipped deeper under the spell he was in.

 

“Sorry,” whispered Erestor, still shaken by his memories. He looked at Glorfindel to reassure himself and actually smiled, finding the blond this close and looking at him in a concerned way. “I was remembering some unpleasant events.”

 

“Then don’t,” said Glorfindel, frowning. “You are still recovering and shouldn’t allow yourself to be dragged under by such memories.”

 

/Did you really forget about me?/ wondered Erestor. /Did you forget my declaration of love, which I delivered in a shaky voice, hoping you felt the same way? Did you forget laughing in my face and dismissing me like I was still an Elfling? I am older than you and originate from an even more renowned House. Did you truly forget me?/

 

“You are doing it again,” said Glorfindel displeased. Maybe it was because he had brought up Gondolin? Maybe Erestor didn’t have any fond memories of that place? “I apologize if it was something I said.” He was completely stunned, seeing the warm and welcoming smile on Erestor’s face, which was directed at him. Erestor never smiled at him! He quickly looked over his shoulder to see who was standing behind him, but there was no one. Erestor *was* smiling at him!

 

Erestor wasn’t sure what to say. His feelings for Glorfindel had never gone away and he still loved the blond from the bottom of his heart, but was he really going to set himself up for more heartbreak? Glorfindel had rejected him millennia ago – even though the Elda might not remember it – so it was most likely Glorfindel would do it again. And he didn’t know *for certain* that Glorfindel had really lost *those* memories. It was safest not to warm up to the blond and he should keep his guard up instead. But what if he had a chance to win Glorfindel’s heart this time?

 

“Erestor? You are worrying me.” The way Erestor was staring at him made Glorfindel wonder. “Is anything amiss? Do I need to fetch Elladan?”

 

Erestor composed himself. “No, that won’t be necessary.” At the same time his stomach growled again. “But I would be most thankful if you would fetch me something to eat from the kitchens.” It was early morning and the cooks were probably preparing breakfast. “You must be hungry too.”

 

Glorfindel nodded; yes, he was hungry and Erestor’s suggestion suited him just fine. “I will be back in a few minutes.” He rose from the bed and walked toward the doorway. However, hearing Erestor’s voice again, he stopped and looked over his shoulder at the dark-haired advisor.

 

“Glorfindel? I was thinking… Maybe we can talk about Gondolin some time? And you are always welcome to borrow any books you want to read.” Erestor fought down the blush that threatened to spread over his face at taking this first step. How would Glorfindel react to his offer? The smile that spread over the blond’s face was warm, yet showed surprise. Erestor relaxed, realizing his offer had been accepted.

 

“I would like that. Thank you… Erestor.” It felt odd, speaking the other’s name without the usual sneering tone attached to it. Feeling awkward, he shuffled his feet and then left the room, heading for the kitchens.

 

Erestor, also smiling, hoped they could put the sneers behind them and start building a friendship. He regretted that it would never be more than that, but having Glorfindel as a friend was more than he had dared hope for.

 

Beta read by Sulien

All remaining mistakes are mine.

 

 

Second Chances

Part 5

 

 

 

“Good morning.” Elros had woken first that morning and was content to just hold his twin close, occasionally stroking the silken hair. Waking up like this brought back long forgotten memories and he controlled his passion for Elrond rigorously, knowing he couldn’t grow aroused now that his twin was beginning to trust him again.

 

Smiling, Elrond turned in the embrace until they were face to face. “And a fine morning it is.” He had woken next to Gil-galad and Celebrian in the past, but having Elros close again felt even better. It was probably due to the tight connection they had always shared and which was growing even stronger now. He felt Elros’ contentment, and his twin’s regrets, but he ignored those for now. “I will have to work in my study for a while today,” he started, “but we can spend the rest of the day together.”

 

“I would like that.” Elros looked deeply into his brother’s eyes and almost tried to kiss his twin’s lips. He caught himself just in time, restraining himself. “Do you want to use the bathroom first?” He had to get Elrond out of bed, or himself, before something happened that would show his attraction. He couldn’t take that risk.

 

Elrond saw worry in his twin’s eyes and easily figured out why it was there. Why? Because he was feeling something he had never experienced before; an attraction where his twin was concerned. Looking into the stormy gray orbs, he realized he was slowly falling in love with Elros, something he had thought impossible.

 

When he had lost Elros to mortality, his heart had been broken and now it was finally beginning to mend. /I am not going to lose him again – no matter in what way./ He had often wondered what life would have been like if he had accepted and returned his twin’s love. The Valar had given Elros back to him – for whatever reason – and he was determined to do things differently this time around. “You never answered my question,” he said eventually.

 

Elros frowned, hoping Elrond wasn’t addressing what he thought was he addressing. “Gwenneth…”

 

“Elros, I need to know. I need to hear you say it!” Elrond cupped his brother’s cheek in the palm of his hand, gently rubbing the soft skin. “Do you still love me?”

 

Elros felt trapped; Elrond was close, caressing his skin and there was no escape. His twin wouldn’t allow it. “I told you not to ask me that question again.”

 

“Stop avoiding answering it. Do you still love me?” Elrond was growing frustrated. He was fairly sure Elros still felt the same way about him, but he needed to hear him say it.

 

Elros was desperate to stall. “When I admitted my love for you, you reacted with loathing and we grew apart. Now that I am back, I don’t wish to repeat past mistakes. I would rather lie to you or not answer you at all, for I couldn’t bear losing your love over this. I refuse to chase you away again.”

 

Elrond had his answer, but he still wanted Elros to admit it verbally. “Do you still love me?” Keeping his eyes trained on Elros, he could tell the exact moment his brother gave in.

 

“Of course I do. Do you really think I could ever stop loving you? You are in my blood, my soul. You are a part of me – the most important part. But I don’t want to lose you over this. I restrained myself in the past whenever we were close – except for giving you that one kiss, which I still regret to this very day. You don’t have to be afraid I will overstep your boundaries ever again. Just don’t turn me away. Please.”

 

Until now, Elrond had never fully realized how much his rejection had hurt Elros. Tears gathered in his eyes, whilst he gently stroked his brother’s cheek. “I will never turn you away again, and I don’t want you to deny yourself these feelings.”

 

Elros, extremely confused, blinked. “But…”

 

“I have changed,” started Elrond thoughtfully. “I am no longer the same person I was when we drifted apart. I have loved – and lost. I now know how rare and precious love is and I want… I want to give us a chance.” Nervously, he moistened his lips, watching Elros’ eyes widen dramatically. “I know this is unexpected, but the truth is that… I am developing similar feelings for you. When I fell in love with Gil-galad and Celebrian, I felt this way, and now it is you I want.”

 

“Elrond…” Lost for words, Elros tried to make sense of what his twin was telling him. After gathering and sorting out his thoughts, he said, “I don’t know why you are saying these things, but they cannot be true. You rejected my love in the past because you thought it was wrong and I agree with you. We shouldn’t be in love.”

 

Frowning slightly in consternation, Elrond quickly placed a finger across his twin’s lips to silence him. “I have grown wiser since then. The Valar and our Elven kin may frown upon our love, may even shun us for it, but I don’t care. You are back in my arms and I refuse to let go. You are mine. Mine!” In order to impress upon Elros the sincerity of his words, he removed his finger from his twin’s lips and claimed them in a kiss full of passion and need.

 

Manip by SayAye, thanks!

Elros’ eyes widened in surprise. He even tried to pull back, convinced Elrond was going against his own instincts for some reason, but when the tip of a demanding tongue pushed against his teeth, he parted them. Elrond’s tongue entered his mouth, exploring, and Elros lost himself in the sensation, letting the younger half-Elf do as he pleased. A part of him couldn’t believe this was happening, but another part eagerly craved it and wished the kiss would never end.

 

Growing breathless, Elrond had to release his twin’s now bruised lips. Meeting Elros’ questioning gaze, he smiled brilliantly. His own actions and feelings baffled him, but he was convinced he was doing the right thing. Elros’ lips tasted divine and he wanted to possess them again, but seeing the puzzled expression in the gray eyes he knew more questions were about to follow.

 

“Why are you doing this?” Elros involuntarily stroked his brother’s back, enjoying holding him this close, but he was afraid that Elrond would unexpectedly jerk away from him and look at him in utter disgust.

 

“I lost you once, I won’t lose you again.” Elrond gave his twin a long, probing look. “I speak the truth when I say that I am falling in love with you. I would prefer to take this slow and to keep this attraction private, but I definitely want to explore our feelings.”

 

“I want to believe you,” mumbled Elros, “But I can’t.”

 

Elrond opted for the only thing that might convince his twin and claimed Elros’ lips again in a slow and passionate kiss, allowing all of his newly awakening feelings to pour forth into it. Pressing the length of his body against Elros’, he was determined to make sure that nothing would ever separate them again. Convincing Elros would take time, but he vowed to succeed.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

When Glorfindel returned from the kitchens, he found Erestor struggling futilely to push himself into a sitting position. He could tell by the expression in the chocolate brown eyes that the advisor was growing frustrated with his inability to move about. “Let me help,” he said, placing the tray on the side table and then hurrying over to the bed to assist Erestor. The glare Erestor threw at him stopped him in his tracks, confusing him. He thought they had gained some measure of understanding, now that Erestor had stopped fighting him about everything.

 

Erestor, seeing Glorfindel halt, realized what he was doing and quickly lowered his eyes, centering himself. It was hard to change his whole demeanor after so many centuries. Once he had composed himself again, he reestablished eye contact with the blond. “I cannot sit upright.”

 

Realizing Erestor was trying to make up for his previous glare, Glorfindel nodded and sat down on the side of the bed. “Let me do this?”

 

Erestor nodded once and let Glorfindel maneuver him into a sitting position. He had regained a small amount of control over his hands and feet, but his movements were still awkward and he lacked the ability to control them. Resigning himself to the fact that he couldn’t possibly eat breakfast without the blond’s aid, he forced himself to accept being fussed over.

 

“Are you comfortable?” Glorfindel had put several pillows against the head end of the bed before settling Erestor against them and now waited for an answer.

 

“Yes, I am comfortable. Thank you.” He gave Glorfindel a weak smile, reminding himself to act politely and nice. /Did you really forget you rejected me?/ The question continued to haunt him, but he lacked the confidence to confront Glorfindel.

 

Glorfindel rose from the bed, collected the tray and sat down again, placing the tray on Erestor’s lap. The cook had prepared porridge this morning, and he doubted his charge could feed himself. “Erestor… I…”

 

“I understand,” said Erestor, sighing, “You may feed me… Just this once though!”

 

Glorfindel gave the dark-haired Elf a reassuring smile and lifted the first spoonful to Erestor’s lips. His charge ate the porridge obediently and they managed to empty the bowl in a few minutes. “Would you also like some tea?”

 

Erestor nodded and waited for the blond to place the cup against his lips. Shakily, he tried to raise his right hand, but it fell back onto the bed once it had reached mid-air. Erestor sighed, frustration mounting again.

 

“You are improving,” offered Glorfindel softly. “Yesterday you couldn’t move at all. You should make a full recovery within the next few days.”

 

“Did you already tell Elrond that I am unavailable?” Erestor preferred not to address his current state and tried to introduce a new topic.

 

“I did.” That reminded Glorfindel there was something Erestor should know. “I must also tell you, something unexpected has happened. The Valar returned Elros to us.”

 

Erestor’s eyes narrowed. “What are you talking about?” Glorfindel forced him to sip more of the tea, which he did and he eagerly waited for the blond to explain this to him.

 

“I found Elros standing in the study. At first I thought it was Elrond, having lost his mind and pretending to be his twin, but when I went to fetch him, I realized there really were two of them.” Glorfindel put down the now empty cup. “I am happy for Elrond.”

 

“Are you sure this is no imposter?” Erestor reminded himself that the Valar had also returned Glorfindel to Middle-Earth, so it could have happened again.

 

“I am certain.” Glorfindel cocked his head, enjoying the relaxed tone of their conversation. “You will instinctively know that it is Elros when you see them together.”

 

Erestor decided to take Glorfindel’s word for it. It wasn’t like he could confront Elros now that he was confined to bed. “I am happy for Elrond. He has been lonely since Celebrian left for Valinor.”

 

Glorfindel smiled warmly, slicing an apple into small pieces, which he slowly fed his charge. Privately, he had to compliment Erestor for accepting his help without sneering at him. This had to be hard on the dark-haired Elf.

 

“You don’t have to sit with me for the entire day,” said Erestor, after eating the last slice of apple. “I know you always have a fairly busy schedule during the day.”

 

Erestor was right, but Glorfindel still wavered. “I don’t want to leave you alone when you are still this immobile.” His gaze searched the room and Glorfindel reached out with his right hand, wrapping his fingers around the wooden carving that he thought resembled him. “When I first saw these I wondered how they had ended up in your room. They are beautiful.”

 

Erestor blushed weakly. “Do you really think so?” Only a few Elves knew he was a skilled artist and that he occupied himself during his lonely evenings by carving these.

 

“Who made them?” Glorfindel placed the wooden carving on the blanket, and then met Erestor’s nervous gaze. /Nervous? Why is he nervous?/

 

“I did,” admitted Erestor in a reluctant tone, doubting Glorfindel would believe him, but he couldn’t tell the blond lies. “I have been carving them for many centuries. What you see here is only a fraction of what I made.”

 

Glorfindel’s eyes widened with surprise. “I never knew…”

 

“It is my only true talent,” Erestor said, smiling weakly. Many Elves at Turgon’s court had asked him to carve representations of their family members, but he had seldom indulged them.

 

“Your only true talent,” repeated Glorfindel, mystified to why Erestor would say that. “I am sure that…”

 

Growing uncomfortable discussing this, Erestor said, “You should head for the barracks and instruct our guards. We cannot risk the border patrols to leave late.”

 

Glorfindel picked up the carving again. “Is it supposed to be me? I think I recognize some of my features.” Why would Erestor immortalize him in wood? The advisor disliked him, didn’t he?

 

Erestor decided to ignore the question. “Seriously, Glorfindel, the guards are already waiting for you. You should leave.” There was no reason for Glorfindel to find out that he found comfort in looking at his love’s face, even merely carved in ancient wood.

 

“I cannot leave yet,” said Glorfindel thoughtfully, wondering why Erestor had avoided answered his question. “What if you somehow fall out of bed?” Smiling pleadingly, he hoped Erestor would go along with the teasing.

 

It took Erestor a moment to realize that Glorfindel was actually joking with him, as he couldn’t remember the blond ever doing that before. “You are right. I will need someone to pick me up and tuck me back in.” Just to confuse Glorfindel a tad more, he said it with a perfectly calm and straight face.

 

Glorfindel quickly caught on that Erestor was retuning the joke, but it still came unexpected to him. “Very true. We cannot leave you lying on the floor all day long. What would people think if they walked in on you like that?” The grin that surfaced on Erestor’s face was an unexpected but welcome sight and Glorfindel was beginning to thank the Valar for letting him crash into Erestor and knock the Elf off his feet, for the fall was greatly improving their relationship.

 

“I might be able to help pick him up…”

 

Erestor and Glorfindel’s heads turned, looking at Elladan who had now appeared in the doorway. “I knocked, but you didn’t hear.” Elladan advanced on them, and he liked what he was seeing. The two Elves seemed to be getting along for the first time since he could remember. “How are you feeling this morning, Erestor?” Signaling for Glorfindel to make way, he sat down on the side of the bed after the blond had vacated the spot.

 

Erestor met Glorfindel’s gaze. He appreciated the blond’s offer to sit with him, but he also knew Glorfindel was needed elsewhere. “Go. Elladan will make sure that I am comfortable.”

 

Glorfindel still hesitated to comply. “Are you certain? They can probably manage without me for a few days.”

 

“No, you need to make sure our borders are safe and now that I cannot assist Elrond you will have to take my place.”

 

“Aiya, I am not good with paperwork.” Glorfindel’s features contorted dramatically.

 

“Go, Glorfindel, I will sit with Erestor. And he is right. My father will need you at his side today. He will be rather distracted now that Elros has returned to us.” Elladan checked the range of Erestor’s movement by manipulating the Elf’s arm. “I doubt my father will get any work done and with Erestor confined to bed, all work will come down on you.”

 

Glorfindel raised his arms in a pleading gesture. “Ai, may the Valar have mercy on me! I am a warrior, not a scribe!” Hearing Erestor chuckle, his eyes sought out dark ones, surprised to hear Erestor laugh. The chief advisor never laughed at things he said! “Are you sure you don’t have a fever? Or are hallucinating?”

 

Erestor released one last, pleased chuckle, and nodded. “I am fine, Glorfindel. Now go and help Elrond.” Watching the blond leave, he was unable to wipe the smile off his face just yet. He was grinning madly, delighted that Glorfindel seemed to like him after all.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

“Elr-rrr…” His younger twin’s name came out as an unintended growl, as Elrond’s lips unexpectedly – and possessively! – claimed his. Wondering why Elrond was acting in such an odd way, Elros tried to free himself of his twin’s embrace, but the other half-Elf wasn’t letting go.

 

Elrond ignored his twin’s squirming and moved closer, determinedly straddling Elros’ hips and burying his hands in the long, loose mane. An insane urge to make sure his twin stayed close consumed him and feeling Elros move beneath him only made him hungrier for his twin’s touch. Briefly releasing Elros’ lips, he looked possessively at his twin, whose lips were bruised, his dark hair disheveled and with his mouth agape. He had definitely surprised Elros, as had been his intention. “I want you,” growled Elrond, “I need you. You are not leaving me ever again!” Diving in closer, he claimed Elros’ lips again, exploring his twin’s mouth and easily besting his twin’s tongue in a one-sided duel as Elros remained passive beneath him. “Do you hear me? Never, Elros...You are mine!”

 

Elros was at a loss. Why was Elrond reacting in this way? Now that his brother was staring at him, he managed to whisper, “I won’t leave you, I promise.” Raising a shaky hand, he brushed a wayward lock behind Elrond’s ear. “You don’t have to pretend that you want me in that way to make sure I stay.”

 

“Pretend?” Elrond frowned, displeased that his twin had reached the wrong conclusion. “I am not pretending. I want you!” His right hand tangled in his twin’s hair, whilst the other slipped beneath the fabric of the tunic, moving down Elros’ side.

 

Although he had thought it impossible, Elros’ confusion continued to mount. “But… You rejected me!”

 

“I was a fool back then,” grumbled Elrond, displeased that his twin was bringing this up now, when all he wanted was to kiss him again. Looking deeply into eyes that were identical to his own, he saw the desire in them, but also doubt. Once more he was reminded that they needed time to get reacquainted, time to rebuild the trust. The bond, love, desire and need consumed them both, but Elros was calm and intelligent enough not to act rashly, and for that, Elrond felt grateful. “Gweniaur, I had no idea what I was saying no to. Only *you* have ever truly understood me – loved me the way I craved being loved, but I didn’t understand that at the time. Can you forgive me?”

 

“There is nothing to forgive,” mumbled Elros absentmindedly, running his fingers down his twin’s long back. Elrond was still straddling him and his body reacted instinctively, growing aroused. “You did what you thought was right. You followed your heart at the time.”

 

“But now my heart dictates a different course.” Gazing at Elros, he nearly lost himself in the gray sea of his twin’s eyes. “Will you give me a second chance? I want one, but do I even deserve a second chance after what I did to you?”

 

Elros tenderly caressed his twin’s face, tracing the strong jaw line. “Are you serious? Or are you doing this out of guilt? For if you are acting out of guilt, we will fail.”

 

“I have felt guilty for so long, gweniaur,” mumbled Elrond sincerely, “It started when you chose mortality. But it ended the moment I held you in my arms again. Although there is still an echo of guilt inside me, it is not directing my actions. As I said earlier, I am falling in love with you, but I won’t force this on you. I need to know if you are willing to take this step and walk this path with me.” Seeing Elros’ wavering expressing, he added, “And I *am* certain. I know what I want, and I want you.”

 

“In *that* way, gwenneth?” Elros swallowed hard. He had wished for this to happen for so long, but had given up hope after choosing mortality. “Elrond, please be honest with me.”

 

“Yes, I want you in that way,” said Elrond as firmly as he could muster. “But not yet. I need more time to really understand that you are back in my life. I was thinking that maybe we could explore… slowly.” Elros searched his eyes for a long time and Elrond involuntarily held his breath, realizing his twin was using their bond to establish the sincerity of his words and his motives. Having nothing to hide, he looked deeply into Elros’ eyes, hoping to convince his twin that he was being honest.

 

“I believe that you think you want this, but you might be acting like this because you are afraid of losing me again.” Elrond wanted to interrupt him, but Elros stopped him with a determined look. “No, hear me. You are overreacting, gwenneth.”

 

“Can you not give me a single chance to prove my feelings to you?”

 

Elrond looked truly lost, and seeing his younger twin like that caused Elros’ heart to ache. “How far do you want to take this?”

 

“Kissing? Caressing?” Elrond grew hopeful again.

 

“I will agree to the following,” started Elros, “Let us continue the kissing and touching for some time, but we won’t go any further until you are fully convinced that I am not leaving you. Once you feel secure knowing me close – and you still desire to be with me in that way – we will discuss this again.” Disappointment showed on Elrond’s face and Elros moved to caress it away, tenderly touching his twin’s brow. “Your feelings might be temporary, gwenneth. You are afraid you will lose me again.”

 

“I don’t agree with that,” growled Elrond, growing frustrated now that his twin wasn’t cooperating. “But I will agree to your offer.” At least that way he could continue kissing those luscious lips and feel his twin against him in such an intimate way. “I will prove to you that my feelings are true.”

 

“I am looking forward to that,” said Elros slowly. “I hope you will succeed. I hope it from the bottom of my heart.”

 

“I won’t let you down,” vowed Elrond, leaning in closer to claim Elros’ lips again.

 

Beta read by Sulien.

All remaining mistakes are mine.

 

Second Chances

Part 6

 

 

Glorfindel was surprised, finding he was actually hurrying back to Erestor’s rooms. During most of the day his worries had kept him distracted and he had been relieved when the patrol had finally left, giving him a chance to look in on his charge. He hurried down the corridor to Erestor’s rooms, knocked, but didn’t bother to wait for the advisor to call him inside. Erestor looked up in surprise when he entered and a quick scan of the room told him that his charge was alone. “Where is Elladan? He is supposed to sit with you.” He didn’t like the fact that Erestor was alone now that the dark-haired Elf was helpless. “I will have a word with him later.”

 

Erestor sighed. “Glorfindel, I asked him to leave. What is the use in Elladan sitting here, holding my hand when they need him in the Healing House? Seriously, I can manage on my own.”

 

Glorfindel raised an eyebrow, indicating he didn’t believe a single word Erestor had just said. “And what if you had needed to visit the bathroom? Or grew thirsty?”

 

Erestor actually smiled at Glorfindel’s concern, which was unexpected. He was grateful that the sneers belonged to the past, for he liked this relaxed tone. But it also held a danger; he could lose his heart to the blond all over again. Was he willing to take that risk? /What do I have to lose? Nothing. Glorfindel rejected me once and I survived. Even if he rejects me again, I will manage eventually./ “Elladan helped me to the bathroom before he left and, as you can see, he placed a carafe filled with water on the nightstand.”

 

“Which you cannot reach!” Glorfindel released a frustrated sigh. “Are you thirsty? Or hungry? ‘Tis time for dinner anyway.” Dinner would be served in the Hall of Fire, but Erestor couldn’t possibly join the other Elves there. “I will ask one of the servants to bring dinner to your rooms. We will eat here.” Erestor would doubtlessly need his assistance.

 

Glorfindel didn’t wait for Erestor to answer him and stepped back into the corridor, where he stopped a servant to take his request to the kitchens.

 

Meanwhile, in his rooms, Erestor wondered how to act in Glorfindel’s presence now that the blond seemed concerned for him and most eager to please. It was a situation he had thought would never occur. Maybe he should indulge himself and just enjoy the time Glorfindel was spending with him? /No more sarcasm./

 

Glorfindel returned and Erestor couldn’t help staring hungrily at the Elda. Glorfindel had always been extremely handsome to him and knowing how valiant and kind the blond was had made him fall even deeper in love with the warrior. Glorfindel was the very reason why he had never taken a lover; the mere fact that his beloved had returned to Arda and had joined Elrond’s household was enough to keep him in limbo. Rationally, he realized they would never be lovers, but now he was beginning to hope they could at least be friends.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

“This is embarrassing,” mumbled Erestor, hating feeling this helpless. Although he was growing increasingly stronger, he had needed to ask Glorfindel to help him eat dinner, as his arms tired quickly. Glorfindel was now feeding him small parts of the duck the cook had prepared and Erestor felt frustrated, wishing this paralysis would leave more quickly. He was already greatly improving but it would be a few more days before he was back on his feet again.

 

Seeing Erestor’s brooding look, Glorfindel had a fairly good idea what was troubling his charge. “This is only temporary, Erestor.” He tried to put himself in the dark-haired Elf’s position and knew he would be frustrated too. “Oh, I almost forgot to tell you… I ran into Elrond and Elros earlier and they announced they would be visiting with you later.”

 

“Both of them?” Intrigued, Erestor probed Glorfindel’s eyes. “What are they like?”

 

Glorfindel nodded in understanding. “I can hardly tell them apart. I always thought Elladan and Elrohir looked identical, but I was wrong. Elros and Elrond are impossible to tell apart, especially now that Elros is wearing Elrond’s robes.” Shaking his head, he grinned. “I thought I knew who Elrond was when I spotted him wearing his favorite butterfly clip, but I was wrong. Apparently Elrond had braided his twin’s hair and had used the clip to hold the mane in place.” Finding that Erestor was smiling brilliantly caused a strangely warm sensation to arise in his heart.

 

“I would have liked seeing that,” mumbled Erestor, smiling. He obediently ate when Glorfindel fed him more roast duck and fresh bread. “I am surprised that you are doing this for me.”

 

Glorfindel didn’t bother to pretend surprise at hearing that question. He was puzzled himself, realizing he enjoyed taking care of Erestor. “I am surprised myself, but…” He moistened his lips, briefly feeling insecure by admitting this to Erestor. “You have mellowed, Erestor.”

 

“The same goes for you,” said Erestor, easily meeting the blond’s gaze. “We are both trying to make this work.”

 

“You are right. I am trying hard not to scowl at you and you stopped snarling back at me. I like it better this way.”

 

“Very true,” said Erestor, pleased. His smile was plastered to his face, happy they were beginning to build a relationship. “Maybe we could continue this, instead of going back to fighting?”

 

“I would like that very much.” Glorfindel put down the empty plate, pleased that Erestor had finished everything on it. “Herbal tea?”

 

“Wine?” asked Erestor hopefully. He had no idea how long Glorfindel intended to stay, but it couldn’t hurt trying to keep the blond here a bit longer. “And a game of chess?”

 

Glorfindel was a bit taken aback, realizing Erestor wanted him to stay. A few days ago the dark-haired Elf would have chased him away and now he was inviting him for a game of chess and a glass of wine? Seeing the hopeful expression in Erestor’s eyes – which the advisor was unsuccessfully trying to hide – he accepted. “Where do you keep your board? And do you have any wine here or do I have to plunder Elrond’s private supply?”

 

Erestor grinned. “You won’t have to do that.” He quickly told Glorfindel the whereabouts of his chessboard.

 

Following Erestor’s directions, Glorfindel also collected a bottle of Elrond’s finest wine. The blond raised a questioning eyebrow. “I cannot remember ever seeing you drink wine.”

 

“I prefer miruvor,” said Erestor, relishing the fact that he was mobile enough to push deeper into the pile of pillows that supported him. “But you are correct. I hardly ever drink wine.” That bottle had been a present from Elrond years ago and had remained untouched since then.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Elrond found it hard to believe his eyes, coming upon his chief advisor and commanding officer. He had told his twin about the strained relationship between the two Elves, but Elros was giving him a puzzled look, finding Erestor and Glorfindel playing chess and enjoying a glass of wine together.

 

“I thought you said they didn’t get along,” mumbled Elros, puzzled at seeing the two Elves this relaxed after everything his twin had told him.

 

“Must be the wine,” replied Elrond in a joking tone, stepping into the room and clearing his throat to announce their arrival. “Erestor? Glorfindel?” He kept his gaze trained on Erestor and was pleasantly surprised to find him returning his smile. /Is it the wine, or Glorfindel’s company? Maybe both./ Elrond had long realized Erestor’s interest in the blond and it was beyond him why his advisor had never courted Glorfindel.

 

Erestor, realizing Elrond had caught on, forced himself to think rationally, but the wine made that difficult. He seldom drank wine and its effect was more powerful than he had thought. He gathered his thoughts and addressed the half-Elf. “Elrond, Glorfindel told me you would visit and I can assure you that I am growing better. I should be able to return to work in two days.”

 

Manip by SayAye, thanks!
 

“Elladan told me you should rest for a week.” Elrond gave Erestor a probing look. “And I trust his judgment. After all, I trained him personally.”

 

Erestor grumbled unintelligibly, displeased. Finding Glorfindel was refilling his glass, he gave the blond a questioning look. But the Elda reacted by making him sip again and his grumbling continued. He knew he should stop drinking, but he enjoyed feeling this calm and relaxed.

 

Elros cleared his throat, gently poking his twin in the side.

 

“Erestor, Elros has returned to us.” Elrond smiled, knowing Elros and Erestor would get re-acquainted over the next few weeks. Erestor had been a good friend and Elros and Erestor would easily settle into a routine.

 

“Mae govannen, Elros. ‘Tis good to see you again after so many millennia and you are most welcome in Imladris.” Erestor inclined his head in respect. “I would greet you properly, but this oaf knocked me off my feet.”

 

Glorfindel blushed weakly. “I was in a hurry!”

 

Elros smiled warmly. “I am certain Glorfindel will make it up to you, Erestor.” Placing a hand at the small of Elrond’s back, he addressed his twin. “Erestor needs to rest. We should give him some privacy.”

 

Glorfindel laughed warmly; the wine was definitely having an effect on him as well. “Yes, I doubt Erestor will admit defeat with the two of you present.”

 

“Defeat?” Erestor sent a mock glare in Glorfindel’s direction. It was the blond who was about to be checkmated!

 

“You are right.” Elrond looked dotingly at Elros and guided his twin out of the room, reassured now that Erestor and Glorfindel weren’t at each other’s throats. “I just had to make sure there wasn’t another kinslaying taking place.”

 

Elros nodded once. “Maybe there is some hidden attraction beneath the fighting?”

 

Elrond arched an eyebrow. “Erestor has feelings for Glorfindel. He just refused to make a move until now. Usually he keeps Glorfindel at a distance with his sharp tongue.”

 

“Ah, I was right then,” said Elros, smirking. “And do you know if there is some attraction on Glorfindel’s part as well?”

 

“I doubt it. He simply assumes Erestor cannot bear his presence.”

 

Elros absentmindedly rubbed his twin’s back. “Maybe the wine will help them relax?”

 

“They already looked awfully relaxed,” said Elrond jokingly. “Who knows what will happen tonight. Though Erestor is in no condition to… *receive* any special attention Glorfindel might bestow on him!” Laughing softly, they made their way back to their rooms, looking forward to spending the rest of the evening in each other’s company.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

“Aiya, this wine is very potent!” Glorfindel’s head was spinning. “What was Elrond thinking, giving you that bottle?” He had lost the game an hour ago and since then they had talked softly, even reminiscing about Gondolin, which had pleased Glorfindel immensely.

 

“He might have hoped for something like this to happen,” said Erestor teasingly. He honestly couldn’t remember ever feeling this relaxed before. Flames danced in the fireplace and Glorfindel had lit the oil lamps some moments before.

 

Glorfindel chuckled, trying to push himself to his feet, but the moment he tried to rise from the chair, he swayed and accidentally fell forward, landing in a heap on Erestor’s bed. “Sorry about that.” Big-eyed, he stared at Erestor, wondering why the dark-haired Elf was so close. “Your bed is soft…” His voice trailed off, as he stretched next to Erestor, eventually curling around the dark-haired Elf and holding him close. “This…

is-s n-nice…” He was quickly falling asleep, enjoying feeling Erestor close.

 

Erestor, who had been shocked when Glorfindel had dropped unceremoniously onto his bed, now giggled. If it hadn’t been for the wine he might have panicked at finding Glorfindel pulling him into his arms, but all he could do now was giggle. “Yes, it is nice, my love.”

 

“Uhuh…” whispered Glorfindel, his eyes filling with reverie. “Ni-nice…”

 

Belatedly Erestor realized what he had called Glorfindel, but in his current intoxicated state he didn’t think of possible consequences. The blond was oblivious to his surroundings and even if Glorfindel had caught his slip, the Elda would attribute it to the wine. Yes, he was safe. There was absolutely no reason to worry. It took him some time, but in the end, he managed to wrap his arms around Glorfindel, determined to hold the blond close in turn. “Sleep tight, my love.” Feeling at peace now that Glorfindel was close, he followed the Elda into reverie.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Elrond studied his twin’s face, eyes closed in sleep and features relaxed. /Why did I ever reject him? Why didn’t I see in him back then what I see in him right now?/ He had wasted so much time! And he didn’t want to waste any more! Gently tracing the outline of his twin’s lips, he smiled warmly, moving closer to claim them.

 

“Hum…” Elros mumbled softly, enjoying being kissed awake in that manner. Opening his eyes, he stared into Elrond’s stormy ones. “Good morning.” Tenderly he ran his fingers through his twin’s long hair.

 

“Morning,” whispered Elrond, pleased that his twin so easily accepted his kiss. “I owe you an apology for the way I acted. You must understand that I am afraid I will lose you again. It made me act a bit… irrational. But that does not mean I spoke lightly! I do love you and want you in that way! Please do not doubt that!”

 

“Your current reaction is hard to reconcile with your reaction millennia ago,” said Elros thoughtfully. “I am beginning to believe you though,” he said, smiling, “But I need time, gwenneth, time to re-adjust. The past is still very close to me. My death is the last thing I remember.”

 

Elrond swallowed hard. “I didn’t realize that.” It did explain his twin’s hesitance to pursue their new relationship just yet. “I will be patient.”

 

“Patience was never one of your virtues, gwenneth,” said Elros teasingly, but he also knew his twin would do his best to give him the time he needed.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

He was warm and comfortable. Arms were wrapped around him and a warm body was pressed against his. Reacting instinctively, Glorfindel pulled his bed partner closer, his lips automatically seeking out their counterparts. Still half asleep, he encountered soft and willing lips and he claimed them in a surprisingly passionate kiss.

 

Slowly regaining consciousness, he finally realized whom he was kissing. Erestor, still sound asleep, was in his arms and the dark-haired Elf’s lips were locked with his in a passionate kiss. /Erestor? I am kissing Erestor?/ And the amazing thing was, Erestor was kissing him back! His distant, calm advisor was now taking control of the kiss, letting his tongue slip past his teeth. Glorfindel didn’t get a chance to protest or stop the kiss, as Erestor slowly rolled atop of him, arms around his waist and their legs entwined.

 

Erestor’s reaction took him completely aback. He had never thought there could be such passion locked away beneath the dark-haired Elf’s cold fire. What surprised him most was his own reaction to Erestor’s passion; he found himself eagerly engaging in the kiss, trying to take back control. But Erestor wasn’t giving in easily. /My, why has he been hiding this passion?/ Getting carried away, he deepened the kiss, rubbing his lower body against Erestor’s in obvious want. /I never thought I would react to him in this way, but…/

 

“Aiya, Erestor,” whispered Glorfindel when his assailant gave him a moment to catch his breath. “You had better wake up before we do something we might regret later.” A part of him didn’t want Erestor to wake up, or to stop kissing him, but he couldn’t continue like this, not with Erestor not knowing what he was doing. Erestor might never forgive him if he allowed this to continue. “Erestor, wake up.”

 

Erestor frowned, still half asleep, but when he realized how close Glorfindel was, his eyes filled with sudden awareness. Staring at the blond in shock, he didn’t even register that he had regained more mobility. All he could think of was that Glorfindel was in his bed and *so* incredibly close! /And I am holding him! Tight!/ He was stunned that the Elda allowed this. “What?”

 

“I never thought I would ever say this, but I thoroughly enjoyed being kissed by you,” admitted Glorfindel amused.

 

“Kissed by me?” Erestor stared at the blond in apparent shock. Had he really taken the initiative?

 

“I might have instigated the kiss, but you surely took charge. You were definitely in control.” Involuntarily he raised his hand to brush a wayward lock away from the face hovering above him. He simply couldn’t help making his next remark. “I gather you like being on top, my dear?”

 

Erestor’s eyes nearly bulged from their sockets hearing that endearment. “What did you call me?” He was so in shock that he never thought about rolling off of Glorfindel.

 

“My dear…” Glorfindel grinned wickedly, suddenly realizing something about Erestor. The dark-haired Elf’s arousal, pressed against his thigh, had already given him a rather obvious hint, but seeing the dazed – and hopeful – expression in Erestor’s eyes told him everything he needed to know. He had never given much thought to the rumors he had overheard in the past, suggesting there was a more passionate reason for Erestor’s chilly attitude toward him. “You do seem quite comfortable on top.” He had been a bit surprised that Erestor had reacted to the ‘my dear’ instead of the ‘like being on top’ comment, but he contributed the slow reactions to the other Elf’s shock.

 

Erestor suddenly realized the compromising position he was in when Glorfindel wriggled beneath him, making him very much aware of the fact that the blond was also aroused. “Get out of my bed!”

 

“Hum, I am in no hurry to leave this warm nest.” When Erestor began to roll off of him, Glorfindel let him, realizing that keeping him in place would only make Erestor more defensive. “You feel softer than I thought, my dear.”

 

“Stop calling me that and leave my bed – right now!” Erestor tried pushing himself into a sitting position, hoping he could rise to his feet, but he tumbled back, ending up sprawled across Glorfindel’s lap. The blond began to laugh warmly and Erestor raised his eyes to glare at him. “Don’t laugh at me!” He had just enough strength left to pound Glorfindel’s chest, but the blow lacked real power and made Glorfindel laugh harder.

 

“Oh, Erestor, stop this.” Smiling curiously, he folded an arm around the other Elf’s waist, keeping him in place. “Explain this to me?”

 

“Never!” Erestor’s struggles to free himself were futile, as his body was still recovering from the injury. His chin now rested on Glorfindel’s chest and he stared directly into the azure eyes. Realizing the blond had him in a tight hold, he stopped squirming. The wriggling to get away from Glorfindel had only resulted in them growing even harder.

 

“Erestor? Why did you kiss me like that?” Glorfindel stopped laughing, seriously interested in Erestor’s answer. “There was passion… There was demand in that kiss. The way you held onto me…” He hoped Erestor would finish his sentences and enlighten him.

 

“I don’t want to talk about this! And let me go!” He was *not* having this conversation with Glorfindel in the position he was in! The worst thing was that his attraction showed so obviously, and so did Glorfindel’s. /Why is he aroused? He is not even attracted to me! Must be the close bodily contact and nothing else!/

 

Glorfindel’s eyes narrowed when revelation hit him. “You like me!” He firmly nodded his head once and smiled again. “You like me!”

 

Erestor sighed. “I don’t like you. You are arrogant…”

 

“And gorgeous,” said Glorfindel, giving Erestor a wink. Seeing the dark-haired advisor blush fiercely, he knew he was right. “You *like* me, Erestor. Admit it.”

 

“I don’t like you.” Erestor closed his eyes, wishing he was somewhere else, anywhere else, just not atop Glorfindel.

 

“You do… Erestor likes me… Who would have thought that?” Glorfindel wished the dark eyes would open again so he could search them. “Why did you never tell me?”

 

Erestor knew he had lost the battle. “Because you don’t like me, Glorfindel.”

 

Glorfindel raised an eyebrow and ran his fingertips along Erestor’s eyelashes, causing the chocolate brown eyes to open. “You never gave me a reason to like you, Erestor.”

 

“That is true,” admitted Erestor, “But I am trying to do things differently now.”

 

Glorfindel nodded in understanding. “May I inquire when these feelings for me started?” He was truly intrigued now. Erestor tried to avert his eyes, but Glorfindel cocked his head, making sure Erestor remained in view.

 

“Many millennia ago.” Why was he telling? Why was he making himself this vulnerable? Was it the amazingly soft expression in those azure eyes? “I have loved you for a long time.”

 

“You have?” Flabbergasted, Glorfindel tried to understand what Erestor was telling him. “You love me?” He had gathered the dark-haired Elf was attracted to him, but now Erestor was speaking of love; a word not idly used by Elves.

 

“I have loved you from a distance for a long time.” There was no way back now and Erestor plunged ahead. “But I know you are not attracted to me

-- a mere scholar. I am not a valiant warrior or skilled swordsman, so I never mentioned it to you. I didn’t see the point in doing so.”

 

Glorfindel slightly shook his head. “You didn’t see the point…” And he had never realized Erestor had feelings for him! “You hid your passion surprisingly well.”

 

“I did my best,” said Erestor, uncertain what to make of Glorfindel’s reaction to his admission. He had expected the blond to quickly get to his feet and flee his room – and his presence. But Glorfindel was still here, holding him in place. “Why are you still here?”

 

“I am thinking…”

 

“Well, that can take some time,” said Erestor, surprised he could still tease Glorfindel in his current predicament.

 

“Erestor, don’t,” whispered Glorfindel, thinking this over. “I am trying hard to figure this out.”

 

Erestor grew quiet and his eyes remained trained on the blond’s face. /What is there for Glorfindel to think about? I know he doesn’t like me in that way. He told me so./

 

“I did enjoy that kiss,” said Glorfindel eventually, deciding Erestor might be worth taking the risk. “Maybe we should try it again?” Erestor’s baffled expression told him that the other Elf had never expected this particular reaction.

 

Mouth agape and his dark eyes widened, Erestor asked, “What did you say?” He must have misheard! Glorfindel couldn’t possibly have suggested *that*!

 

“Maybe it would be best to demonstrate,” whispered Glorfindel, smiling as he finally claimed Erestor’s lips again.

 

Beta read by Sulien.

All remaining mistakes are mine.

 

Second Chances

Part 7

 

 

“What are your plans for today?” Elros privately enjoyed the feel of Elrond’s fingers combing through his hair. They had already dressed and his older twin had eagerly loaned him some nice burgundy robes. Elrond was now catching wayward strands of hair in the mithril butterfly clip, making sure the dark locks wouldn’t hinder him during the day. “Any urgent matters to attend to?”

 

“Maybe. With Erestor injured, I should thoroughly study the latest reports. Orcs always try to penetrate our borders and I have to keep track of their movements. But maybe we can go for a walk later? Or would you prefer to go horseback riding?” Elrond moved until he was in front of his twin and lovingly looked into the calm gray eyes. Calm, always calm, not as stormy and restless as his. “You returned to Arda and are probably eager to explore the valley and I want you to see Imladris in her full glory.”

 

Elros thoughtfully nodded his head, rising from his chair to stand beside his brother. “You built a safe heaven here and I would love to explore the valley, but first you should attend to your duties. I realize that I am a distraction to you, but you cannot neglect your work. I will help you where possible.”

 

Elrond gathered his twin’s hand in his and rubbed the skin with his thumb. “How did I ever manage without you? You are my *life*. Why didn’t I see that so many millennia ago? Maybe then I wouldn’t have lost you.”

 

“The past cannot be changed, but we can shape the present and the future. Let us look forward, gwenneth. There is no use in dwelling on past decisions.” Elros smiled encouragingly at his twin and gently squeezed Elrond’s hand, promising, “And we will walk that path together.”

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Erestor was utterly stunned when Glorfindel kissed him again, deeply, demandingly, and completely possessing him. The blond’s exploration of his mouth caused strange sensations in the pit of his stomach and he felt light-headed, just like when he had drunk too much wine. Aiya, he could easily grow drunk on Glorfindel – the mere taste of him! The blond was as sweet as honey!

 

And Glorfindel instinctively knew that. Erestor eagerly yielded to him, letting him do whatever he wanted. Erestor’s reaction surprised him, but once he realized how genuine the other Elf’s desire and affection were, he began to let go of his last suspicions. For one moment he had thought Erestor was playing him, manipulating him, but the eager expression in those dark eyes told him that the other Elf really wanted him. /He mentioned love. He loves me. How is that possible? Why didn’t I notice before?/ And what were his exact feelings for Erestor? The dark-haired advisor mystified him. Erestor was an enigma, a riddle he didn’t know how to solve. /Maybe I shouldn’t try solving it. Maybe I should just let it happen./

 

Glorfindel had only loved once – truly loved. Ecthelion had been the love of his life, but the warrior had died millennia ago and Glorfindel hadn’t loved again since then. No one had ever awoken the same feelings Ecthelion had so long ago. And now here was Erestor – professing he loved him.

 

Continuing their kissing, Glorfindel searched Erestor’s eyes, which were warm and open, hiding nothing. He had never seen Erestor this passionate before – this genuinely open. Should he take this risk? Could he? Did he want to love again? And what was the exact nature of his feelings for the raven-haired advisor? “You are beautiful in a dark way,” said Glorfindel thoughtfully, hoping he could sort out his feelings and thoughts whilst speaking them aloud. “You are cunning and intelligent, and you radiate a sense of authority which I seldom encountered in an Elf before.” As if to correct himself, he added, “But you don’t seem distant to me now. You are warm and willing. Even eager for my touch.”

 

Erestor wasn’t sure what to make of Glorfindel’s words. “Why are you telling me this?” Was the blond rejecting or complimenting him? “Be honest with me. I can take rejection, but I won’t allow you to play with my feelings.”

 

Glorfindel’s fingers brushed across Erestor’s brow. “You fit perfectly in my arms, like you were meant to be in them.” Delighted, he found that this remark was making Erestor blush. “I am surprised to find myself attracted to you, and if you are willing to continue kissing, so am I.”

 

Erestor felt at a loss. His instincts told him to accept this offer and keep Glorfindel close as long as possible, but his heart cautioned him, warning him danger lay ahead. The blond had rejected him before and would do so again. But then Glorfindel’s lips locked with his in another probing kiss and a warm hand slipped experimentally down his back, rubbing his skin. His eyes widened at the intimate contact, suddenly wondering if they weren’t moving surprisingly fast.

 

“Lord Glorfindel! The men are awaiting your inspection!”

 

Glorfindel groaned, his breath slipping past Erestor’s lips. “Why now?” Giving the dark-haired Elf a disappointed look, he added, “Can you manage without me for an hour of two? I will also ask Elladan to check on you later.”

 

“I will manage,” mumbled Erestor softly. “Are you certain you want to return to me after your work is done?”

 

Those words made Glorfindel realize just how insecure Erestor really was. “I will come back to you, I promise.” Pressing a last kiss on Erestor’s brow, he reluctantly left the bed. “Try to stay out of trouble, my dear.”

 

“Stop calling me that,” said Erestor, returning the bantering, privately enjoying hearing Glorfindel call him that.

 

Glorfindel walked toward the doorway, casting one last, probing look at Erestor. It was a good thing that his second in command had chosen that moment to remind him of his duties. Erestor had felt so good pressed against him that he had been tempted to take the next step as well. Now that he was regaining his senses and calming down he realized that they were in no way ready yet for that.

 

Erestor sighed regretfully when Glorfindel closed the door behind him. He had wanted the blond to stay, but it was already bad enough that Elrond had to do without his chief advisor. The half-Elf shouldn’t be without his Captain as well. Pressing deeper into the comfort of the mattress, he tested the range of his regained movement and tried to push himself into an upright position, succeeding eventually. Only a few more days and he would be back on his feet again!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

“I gather you designed these gardens yourself?” inquired Elros, impressed at seeing such complex designs. Autumn was descending over the valley, but the trees were still green and the flowers carried luxurious blossoms.

 

“I did. Celebrian was very fond of gardens and these were my wedding present to her when she came to live here.” Elrond’s expression briefly grew pained. “I still miss her. She was a good wife, and the children and I adored her. I hope that she is happy in Valinor and that she has found peace of mind after what those monstrous Orcs did to her.”

 

“You loved her enough to let her go. A rare gift,” said Elros thoughtfully, walking next to his twin.

 

“I had no choice,” whispered Elrond, his thoughts returning to those pain-filled days. “But let us not dwell on the past,” he said, repeating words Elros had spoken earlier. “We live in the here and now.”

 

A fierce growl, unexpectedly coming from the bushes to their left, and the sudden movement of air, alerted them that something was wrong, but the warning came too late. A Warg suddenly leapt toward them, flashing his teeth ominously and reaching out for them with his sharp claws.

 

/How did that monster get past the sentries?/ Elrond reacted at once, knowing they had to run for their lives, now that they were unarmed and vulnerable. “Guards! Come quickly!” After calling out for help, he started to run, dragging Elros with him.

 

Elros realized the danger they were in and he sped up, grabbing Elrond’s hand to make sure they weren’t separated. There was no time to talk, or to voice a warning, as the Warg unexpectedly leapt closer, his sharp teeth ripping off a piece of Elrond’s robes. Elrond called out to his sentries again and suddenly Glorfindel appeared, flanked by three other warriors, but they were still too far away to help.

 

Seeing that the Warg was preparing for another attack, Elros quickly made up his mind. He pushed Elrond away from him, grabbed a large branch and turned around to face the monster. “Run, Elrond! Run!”

 

“I am not leaving you!” Elrond refused to desert his twin and broke off another heavy branch from one of the trees, running back to join his brother. But then the Warg acted, and Elrond’s heart froze in his chest, seeing the monster’s teeth bury themselves in his twin’s side.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Glorfindel ran as hard as possible, but the Warg was still too far away for them to attack. One of the guards shot an arrow at the wild beast and hit it in the back, but the Warg’s teeth were still deeply buried in Elros’ body, chewing itself a way up the half-Elf’s chest.

 

Horrified screams erupted from Elrond’s lips and Glorfindel cursed, seeing his old friend throw himself at the Warg, pounding it with a branch. The beast released Elros to snap at Elrond and the half-Elf managed to thrust the end of the branch into one of the horrific eyes. The Warg released a frantic growl and ignored Elros for now to focus on his attacker.

 

Elros had fallen onto the ground and was now clutching his side, losing blood rapidly. He had jokingly remarked to Elrond that he had no desire to find out if he was mortal or not, but this could well be a fatal wound and he wished he knew the truth now. If he was mortal he wanted to properly say goodbye to his twin before he died!

 

Elrond drove the end of the branch deeper into the beast’s eye socket, drawing maddened howls from the creature. From the corner of his eye he saw the pool of blood that was forming beneath his twin and his heart pounded madly. He couldn’t lose his brother – not after just having been reunited!

 

Glorfindel and the two guards had finally reached them and the blond hacked away at the Warg with his sword, quickly drawing its attention away from the Peredhil. “Elrond, leave him to us and look after Elros!” His men were rapidly firing arrows at the beast and his sword found its way into the Warg’s body to pierce its heart.

 

Elrond acted at once and threw aside the bloodied branch. He knelt at his brother’s side and his hands probed the injury, hoping it wasn’t a mortal wound. His heart sank into his stomach, realizing the wound would be fatal to a mortal. “Elros…”

 

“It seems… we will find out… after all… gwenneth.” Elros had struggled to remain awake, but now he had lost his battle and slipped into unconsciousness.

 

Elrond’s features became determined; he wouldn’t let his twin die. Pushing his arms beneath Elros’ back and knees, he lifted his brother and quickly carried him to the Healing House. Apparently the bad news had already spread and he found Elladan there, ready to assist him. “We need to stop the blood loss and get him stabile. We won’t lose him, do you hear me?” Elrond stared at Elladan, hoping his son understood how important Elros was to him.

 

“He will live,” said Elladan in understanding, helping his father to lay Elros down on one of the operating tables. He called for warm water, clean bandages and the healing herbs whilst helping his father undress Elros. “How did that Warg escape the guards’ attention?”

 

“I have no idea, but someone will be reprimanded for this!” Elrond had finally stripped away the last fabric of the robes and examined the wound thoroughly. “We need to close him up to stop the blood loss.” He didn’t even want to think of possible complications, like infections.

 

Elladan, who managed to stay a bit more emotionally unattached, remarked, “This makes Elros an immortal then, like you he is fully Elven, for a Man would never have survived such an injury.”

 

“I thought so too, but I was afraid to hope the Valar had returned him to us in immortal form.” Elrond accepted the needle and thread, which Elladan handed him, and began to close the wound with tiny stitches, hoping the scar his twin would carry away from this encounter would fade away eventually. “Why do you think they did that? Give him immortality when he chose to be mortal in the past?” Elrond needed to unburden his soul and was grateful that Elladan remained at his side, working on more bite marks closer to the shoulder.

 

“Maybe because *you* are immortal?” suggested Elladan, trying to stay focused on their patient. “That way you won’t be separated again. Had they given him a mortal life you would have had to say goodbye to him at one point.”

 

Elrond had finished closing the wound and placed the needle aside, reaching for a cloth, which he soaked in the tepid water, eager to remove the blood from his twin’s body. “I have lost so many I loved,” he whispered absentmindedly. “I wouldn’t survive losing one more.” His cloudy glance met Elladan’s. “I wouldn’t survive losing Elros --again.”

 

Elladan nodded once. He had finished cleaning and bandaging the wounds located on Elros’ chest and shoulder and now helped his father to wrap bandages around the elder Elf’s waist, covering the nasty injury in Elros’ side. “You didn’t lose him.” Elros probably was just as tough as his father, reckoned Elladan.

 

“I thank the Valar for that!” Together they lay Elros back down onto a cot. “Fetch me a sleeping robe, Elladan.”

 

Elladan obeyed, left the room and returned a few minutes later, handing Elrond a gray robe. Assisting his father, Elladan managed to hold Elros in place long enough for Elrond to put the robe on their patient. “He should stay here, in the Healing House, Ada. I pray there won’t be any complications, but one never knows.”

 

“I will stay as well,” decided Elrond. Determinedly, he sat down on the side of the bed, gathering his twin’s hand in his. “And I want to speak to Glorfindel, now!” His Captain was responsible for letting the beast penetrate their defenses! Somehow Glorfindel had failed to keep the monster out and he would make sure this never happened again!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Glorfindel stared in disdain at the dead Warg at his feet. Turning around, he saw the guilty expression on the guards’ faces. “Find out how this creature managed to pass our borders.” Someone had been sleeping or looking the other way. Normally these beasts were easily tracked down and killed before they could reach the Last Homely House. The Imladris’ guards had perfected this system centuries ago – or had thought they had perfected it! – when the twins had been born. The thought of a Warg, or any other dangerous animal coming across the children by accident had given him nightmares back then. Had his men become a tad lax since then?

 

The two guards hurried away and Glorfindel poked the dead monster with the tip of his boot. He still felt horrified, recalling hearing Elrond’s distressed calls for help. He had been on his way to Elrond’s study with the latest reports on Orc activity when he had heard the screams and he had acted at once, realizing their Lord was in danger.

 

Seeing Elros going down would haunt him for the next few nights. It was his duty to keep the inhabitants of Imladris safe and he took this as a personal failure. In future he had to make sure his men remained sharp and alert. This couldn’t happen again!

 

“Lord Elrond wishes to talk to you.” Lindir had been sent to deliver the summons and he could tell by the look in Glorfindel’s eyes that the blond expected trouble. “Please follow me.”

 

Glorfindel sighed once and then nodded his head. He had a pretty good idea why Elrond wanted to talk to him and expected the Peredhel to have one of his infamous temper tantrums now that his twin had nearly been killed. /And I do deserve that lecture. I was too busy attending to Erestor!/

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Glorfindel nervously shuffled into the room. One look at Elros told him that the half-Elf would live, but when his gaze met Elrond’s, the Elda shivered at the expression in the restless eyes.

 

“How could this happen?” Elrond, trying to talk softly, so as not to disturb his sleeping twin, hissed the words from between his clenched teeth.

 

Glorfindel flinched, recognizing the upset tone. If it hadn’t been for Elros’ presence in the room, Elrond would be raving and ranting, maybe even screaming at him. At that moment he felt immensely grateful that Elros was present. Elrond, whilst in the clutches of a tempter tantrum, was *not* a pretty sight. /I cannot blame him for feeling this way though. I would be angry with myself too, if I were in his place. “I am trying to find out which sentry let him pass by. I promise that this will never happen again.”

 

“It happened once! That is one time too many!” Elrond glared at the blond. A distant part of him knew he was being unreasonable and too harsh on his Captain, but he had been scared witless, afraid he was going to lose his twin. And Glorfindel was going to get burned by his wrath. He already knew he would feel guilty later and apologize to his dear friend, but right now he needed to let go of these feelings.

 

Elrond reluctantly released Elros’ hand from his tight hold and marched toward Glorfindel. His normally gray eyes had darkened and glared at the blond. “Elros could have died and it would have been your fault! You should thank the Valar on your knees that he is an immortal now. Had he still been a Man he would have died! Where were you when that Warg crossed our borders? And why were you late when that monster attacked us? You failed to keep your Lord and his twin safe!”

 

Glorfindel tried to remain composed, knowing Elrond didn’t really mean any of this, but the words still hurt. By looking at Elrond’s nervously twitching hands, he could tell that his friend was in shock; they opened and closed involuntarily as if trying to strangle the Warg, killing the monster. He wisely held his tongue, knowing from personal experience that it was best to let Elrond rave. That way, the half-Elf’s negative energy burned itself out.

 

“Don’t you know that I cannot live without him? Do you want me dead too?” Elrond, feeling exhausted all of a sudden, collapsed onto a chair and regained possession of his twin’s hand. His gaze searched his brother’s face and he was stunned at finding the eyes open and alert.

 

“Gwenneth…” started Elros, gathering his strength, “It wasn’t… Glorfindel’s… fault.”

 

Elrond bit his bottom lip, but still looked defiant. “It is his task to keep us safe.”

 

Elros managed a weak smile. “I am still… alive, gwenneth… Let go.”

 

Elrond knew exactly what his twin was asking him, but he wasn’t ready yet to let go of his anger. Right now his anger was the one thing pulling him through. Once he faced his fears he would crumble and he wanted to spare Elros that miserable sight.

 

“Glorfindel? Leave us,” commanded Elros in a shaky tone. “And forgive my stubborn brother his thoughtless words.” Elros wasn’t sure how much longer he could stay conscious, as exhaustion and blood loss was pulling him under.

 

Glorfindel soundlessly left the room, closing the door behind him to give them the privacy they craved. Standing in the corridor, he wondered where to go and what to do. Although he knew that Elrond had spoken without thinking his words over first, they had hurt him.

 

/Erestor… I will go to him./ He didn’t know why the advisor’s name was the first to come to mind, but he turned around and headed for Erestor’s rooms.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

“You were much… too hard on him… gwenneth.” Elros was growing increasingly tired, but managed to gently squeeze Elrond’s hand. “It wasn’t… his fault.”

 

Elrond refused to give in to reason just yet; his fears, anger and worry still overwhelming him. “I could have lost you.”

 

“But you didn’t.” Elros smiled weakly. “I gather… this makes me Elven… and no longer mortal?” Talking was draining him, but he needed to reassure his twin.

 

“Yes, it does… Elros! I was so afraid to lose you when that creature buried its fangs in your side.” Elrond nearly crushed the bones in his twin’s hand, so tightly was he holding on.

 

“Gwenneth… I am not… leaving you.” Elros managed to free his hand from his twin’s vice-like grip. “Relax… and calm down… for me.”

 

“Can I… Would you mind if… if I held you close?”

 

“Only… if you promise… not to squeeze… the life… out of me,” said Elros jokingly.

 

Elrond – who had been surprised to feel Elros pull away his hand – now understood. “I am sorry.”

 

Elros patted the space next to him. “Lie down and hold me, then.”

 

And Elrond did just that, holding his twin close and thus convincing himself Elros was alive and on the road to recovery.

 

Beta read by Sulien.

All remaining mistakes are mine.

 

Second Chances

Part 8

 

 

“Erestor?” Glorfindel hesitantly shuffled into the room, uncertain how Erestor would react to seeing him in such emotional turmoil. He had never been able to hide his feelings well and knew the dark-haired Elf would read him like an open book.

 

Erestor, sitting upright and leaning back into a pillow, looked up from the book he was reading and immediately sensed something was wrong. He had known the blond long enough to easily tell how upset Glorfindel was. “What happened?” He placed the book aside and patted the space next to him. “Come, sit down and tell me.” It still felt strange to act like himself in Glorfindel’s presence, as he was used to hiding behind spiteful remarks.

 

Glorfindel gingerly sat down, fighting down the memory of the ‘old’ Erestor that threatened to surface, warning him not to make himself vulnerable, for Erestor would take advantage of that. /But Erestor has changed. He loves me./

 

Testing the waters, he reached for Erestor’s right hand and curled his fingers around it, holding it close. “A Warg attacked Elros. I have no idea how the beast got past our sentries, but it showed up in the gardens and attacked Elros and Elrond.” He could tell Erestor already had questions, but the advisor kept them back, allowing him to tell the story in his own time, which he appreciated. “The beast injured Elros, but he survived and will recover eventually. Elrond and Elladan are convinced Elros is immortal.”

 

Erestor nodded encouragingly, knowing Glorfindel wasn’t finished yet. The blond hadn’t even touched the real reason why he was this upset and he told himself to be patient. Glorfindel would tell him when the blond was ready.

 

“Elrond told me it was my fault that Elros was injured and he is correct. I should have made sure the sentries were sharp and alert.” He shook his head in self-loathing and gave Erestor a pleading look. “I have grown lax.”

 

Erestor determinedly shook his head and grabbed Glorfindel’s tunic, pulling him close until their faces were only inches away. “Elrond doubtlessly threw one of his famous tantrums, causing you to feel guilty when you have no real reason to take the blame.” His fingertips traced the blond’s strong jaw line. “You know as well as I do that Elrond will apologize for his behavior in the next few hours, wishing he had never said those words to you. He nearly lost his twin, Glorfindel, it made him emotional. But that doesn’t mean his words are true. As long as I can remember you have always tried your best to keep everyone safe and that didn’t change when you accepted the position of Elrond’s commanding officer. Rest your heart, my love. You aren’t to blame.”

 

/Such beautiful words, and exactly what I needed to hear./ Following his instincts, he touched his lips to Erestor’s for a tender kiss. Erestor sighed into his mouth and Glorfindel wrapped his arms around the dark-haired Elf. /If someone had told me I would ever go to Erestor for comfort, I would have declared them insane./

 

Erestor was deeply touched, feeling Glorfindel relax against him. He didn’t know what he had done to gain the blond’s trust, but apparently he had managed to do so. Although he was still rather weak, he managed to create a similarly firm hold on Glorfindel. Guiding the blond head onto his shoulder, he rubbed soothing circles on Glorfindel’s back through the fabric of his tunic. Stroking the golden hair with his other hand, he rocked Glorfindel ever so slightly. “You are a very brave warrior, do not ever believe differently. You died defending your loved ones and no one will ever question your honor.”

 

Glorfindel briefly shivered. “The way you said that made it sound like you saw me die.”

 

Swallowing hard, Erestor cursed his own stupidity for letting that one slip. When Glorfindel raised his head to make eye contact, he quickly averted his gaze.

 

“Erestor?” Glorfindel frowned; he couldn’t possible be right! “Did you witness my death?”

 

“We shouldn’t discuss this now when you are already upset,” said Erestor, trying to avoid answering that question.

 

But Erestor’s answer told Glorfindel what he had wanted to know. “You did!” Feeling Erestor flinch against him, he raised one hand and cupped the other Elf’s chin in his palm. “Did we know one another in Gondolin? And if we did, why can’t I remember you?” Aiya, he had lost part of his memory... Had he forgotten they had met before? “Erestor?”

 

Erestor tried turning away, but Glorfindel wouldn’t let him. “Don’t ask me that question.”

 

That answer only served to feed Glorfindel’s curiosity. “We did meet before, but you feel uncomfortable, remembering it. Why is that?” And why did he suddenly no longer want to find out? Something told him he should never have asked that question, but it was too late now. “What did I do? How did I wrong you?”

 

Erestor swallowed hard. “I would rather not discuss this.”


”I insist,” said Glorfindel firmly. Caressing Erestor’s face, he searched the dark eyes that now hesitantly fastened on him. “How did I hurt you?”

 

“You made fun of my love for you. You rejected me, laughing at me for falling in love with you.”

 

Glorfindel flinched and shivers ran down his spine at hearing old and never dealt with pain in Erestor’s voice. If only he could remember! “I have no memories of doing that to you! Please tell me more so I can understand and may apologize for my past behavior.”

 

“Do you really want to learn more?” Erestor frowned; that wasn’t the reaction he had expected!

 

“Yes, tell me more.” Glorfindel firmly held Erestor’s gaze and refused to let the raven-haired Elf pull away when the advisor tried to increase the distance between them.

 

“Just remember you wanted to know.” Erestor sighed, recalling the past, which was still vivid in every little detail in his memory. “I was Turgon’s chief advisor and the first time I met you I fell madly in love with you. I was new at Turgon’s court and didn’t yet know that you were in love with Ecthelion; otherwise I would have smothered my feelings for you. But by the time I found out about your lover it was already too late and I had made a fool of myself.”

 

“In what way?” His memories were slowly returning, showing him a more naive and open Erestor, who always sat at his King’s right, ready to offer his council.

 

“I declared my love for you and asked permission to court you.” Pausing, Erestor bit his bottom lip nervously. “You laughed at me and told me to find someone more ‘compatible’ with me, as you were a warrior and I an advisor. Ecthelion had been waiting in the corridor and I could hear you ridicule my admission from the antechamber. That hurt.”

 

Glorfindel, who had already felt guilty to begin with, now plunged even deeper into darkness. “I am so sorry. I never wanted… Don’t remember…” He averted his eyes and released Erestor from his hold. “I wish I could take those words back.”

 

Erestor gave the blond a moment to compose himself, but when Glorfindel seemed unable to gather his senses, he reached out and buried the Elda in a warm hug. “I already gathered you had forgotten about that incident.”

 

“And *that* is why you kept your distance when I joined Elrond’s household.”

 

“You rejected me once. I assumed nothing had changed and that you would do it again. I wasn’t strong enough to try again.” This time it was Erestor who raised Glorfindel’s face to look into the azure eyes. “Imagine my surprise when you said you liked being kissed by me and that you wanted to continue kissing.”

 

“I understand now.” Glorfindel still felt guilty and miserable for hurting Erestor in the past, even when he didn’t remember doing it, but the expression in those dark eyes spoke of hope and love, reassuring him that he still had a chance to redeem himself. “And thank you for giving me this chance to prove myself to you.”

 

Erestor nodded once, still embracing Glorfindel tightly. “My timing could have been better. You already felt miserable and I added to your dark feelings.”

 

“I pressured you into telling me,” said Glorfindel softly.

 

“Maybe it is good that we got this out in the open at this early stage of our… relationship.” Erestor still wasn’t sure what to call their beginning friendship. He did feel it would be best for them to become friends first, before taking the step to become lovers. But was that still possible? They had already kissed and he had admitted he loved the blond, whilst Glorfindel had revealed none of his feelings for him – provided the Elda held any affection for him.

 

“Thank you for telling me,” whispered Glorfindel eventually. Running his fingers through Erestor’s long hair, he was determined to make it up to the raven-haired Elf for the hurts he had caused in the past. “May I kiss you again?”

 

Erestor blushed. “Yes, but this still feels unreal.”

 

Glorfindel decided they had talked more than enough. It was time to kiss his new beloved and to make Erestor forget how much he had been hurt in the past. Leaning in closer, he claimed Erestor’s sweet lips, placing every ounce of affection into that one, passionate kiss, hoping it would drive away the memories that still haunted the dark-haired Elf.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

“Glorfindel?” Elrond entered hesitantly, surprised to find the blond in bed with Erestor. Elladan had directed him here when he had found the Elda’s quarters empty. Apparently Glorfindel and Erestor had dealt with whatever had made them fight in the past. “May I enter?”

 

Glorfindel was careful not to move now that Erestor was sound asleep, as it had taken the still recovering Elf some time to drift off into reverie. “As long as you speak softly you are welcome. I don’t want him to wake up.”

 

Elrond soundlessly crossed the room and sat down on a chair next to the bed. “I must admit I am flabbergasted at seeing you holding Erestor in your arms.”

 

“We talked,” mumbled Glorfindel, unwilling to explain further at this point.

 

Elrond got the hint and softly cleared his throat, feeling nervous as he always did after he had acted rashly. “I owe you an apology.” He had lost count of the many times he had apologized to Glorfindel for losing his temper during these last millennia. “It wasn’t your fault that Elros was attacked.”

 

“Thank you,” said Glorfindel softly, “But you were partly right. We need to make sure our sentries remain alert at all times. This time it was a Warg that reached the Last Homely House. The next time it could be Orcs if we don’t tighten our defenses. The attack on Elros should serve as a reminder for us to stay alert.”

 

“You are right,” said Elrond thoughtfully, wondering about the remarkably soft expression on Erestor’s face. He had seldom seen his chief advisor this much at ease! “He seems at peace in your arms, my friend.” Elrond was grateful that Glorfindel had let him off the hook so easily, not calling him on his temper tantrum and decided it was time to change their subject. “That does surprise me.”

 

“Believe me when I say I was stunned as well.” Glorfindel looked fondly at Erestor, who had snuggled even closer in his sleep. “He loves me.”

 

Elrond raised an elegantly carved eyebrow.

 

“He loves me,” repeated Glorfindel, wondering why he was confiding in Elrond after all. He hadn’t wanted to reveal this to his friend yet.

 

“He told you, then?”

 

Glorfindel stared at the half-Elf in shock. “You knew he had feelings for me?”

 

“I often advised him to tell you, but something kept him back.”

 

“I rejected him in the past,” whispered Glorfindel, shocked to learn that Elrond had known the entire time. Why had the half-Elf never told him about Erestor’s feelings? /But no, Elrond couldn’t do that for it meant betraying Erestor’s trust in him and he would never do that./

 

“When was that?” Elrond searched his mind, unable to remember such a moment.

 

“When we lived in Gondolin.”

 

Elrond frowned. “I must confess to feeling lost.”

 

“I once told you that I lost parts of my memory when I was reborn. Knowing Erestor lived at Turgon’s court was one of the things I forgot. I remember it now; remember him confessing his love for me and turning him away, ridiculing him for falling in love with me. I was head over heels in love with Ecthelion. I mistreated Erestor, making fun of him, but I was young and all I could think of was Ecthelion. I would never react like that again, but back then I did.”

 

“It would explain his reluctance to admit his feelings to you,” said Elrond, sighing. “And what will your next move be now that you know the truth?”

 

“I don’t know when or why it happened, but I do have feelings for him.” Hugging Erestor close, he smiled, hearing his lover’s pleased moan. “I want to make this work.”

 

“Then I wish you the best of luck,” said Elrond, rising from the chair. “And Glorfindel? I only lashed out at you because I am afraid to lose Elros again.”

 

“I know that,” said Glorfindel soothingly. “Why don’t you return to his side? I know you are eager to be with him.”

 

Elrond nodded once. “Thank you for being so understanding.” Softly, he walked toward the doorway and soundlessly closed the door behind him. Glorfindel was right; he did want to sit with Elros.

 

Now that they were alone again, Glorfindel pressed a kiss on top of Erestor’s head, which was tucked beneath his chin.

 

“See? I told you he would apologize,” mumbled Erestor in a sweet tone. He had woken during their conversation and had pretended he was still asleep. Hearing Glorfindel say that he wanted them to work out made him feel warm inside. Maybe there was hope for them yet.

 

“I thought you were asleep.”

 

“I woke up in the middle of your conversation.”

 

Glorfindel rubbed Erestor’s back beneath the blanket. “Now that you are awake, would you kiss me?”

 

“Always…” Raising his head from Glorfindel’s chest, Erestor eagerly complied.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

“Erestor?” Elladan shuffled into the advisor’s rooms. A quick glance told him that Erestor was awake and regaining his mobility, as the elder Elf was flipping the pages of his book. “Am I interrupting your reading or can we talk?” Normally he would go to either his father or his brother, but Elrond was busy attending to Elros, and Elrohir had joined Glorfindel on today’s patrol.

 

Erestor looked up from his book and probed Elladan’s worried eyes. “Come closer and sit with me. Tell me what is troubling you.” Erestor signaled for Elladan to approach and he waited until the younger half-Elf had seated himself before he spoke again. “You look worried.”

 

“That is because I *am* worried!” Elladan wrung his hands, unable to hide his agitation. “Can I speak freely with you?”

 

Erestor nodded once. “Of course you can.” He wondered what had upset Elladan, who was normally very balanced and calm.

 

“’Tis my father and Elros… The way they look at each other.” Elladan hoped Erestor understood; then he didn’t have to spell it out to the older Elf.

 

“And how *do* they look at each other?” asked Erestor carefully, seeing how concerned Elladan was.

 

“’Tis the same way Ada looked at Nana. And Ata’da looks at Galadriel in that way…” His voice was barely audible when he added, “I don’t know what to think of that.”

 

Now Erestor understood. Cautiously, he gathered Elladan’s hand in his and reassuringly stroked the back. “I have known your father for many millennia. After I fled Gondolin I was assigned to teach Gil-galad. And later, Elros and Elrond joined us in Lindon.”


Surprised, Elladan raised an eyebrow. He hadn’t known Erestor had lived in Gondolin at one time! “You knew them both?”

 

“Yes, and even back then I wondered about the same thing. There is so much love and affection in their touches that I began to study them when they felt unwatched. I reached the conclusion that they were incredibly tight. The bond they share is quite unique, pen-neth. Not even Elrohir and you share such a tight connection.”

 

“So you think that I am right? That they… are in love?” Elladan expectantly looked at Erestor.

 

“That is a safe assumption to make.” Erestor studied Elladan extensively. “Is that the reason why you are this upset?

 

“I don’t know what to think of that,” admitted Elladan in a tiny voice.

 

Erestor nodded his head once. “You can either accept their love, or reject it. You have little say in their feelings. But consider this, Elladan, they have been apart for millennia and you see how they are when they are together. Do you really want to take that away from them? Only the Valar know where Elros’ fëa resided after his death and Elrond has resembled the walking dead since your mother sailed for Valinor. Don’t they deserve some happiness?”

 

“Your words are sound, Erestor.” Elladan nervously bit his bottom lip. “Would you council me in this matter?”

 

/Ah, he is slowly growing up,/ thought Erestor, pleased. Elladan used to be too stubborn to take his advice. “Give them time. Give them a chance to sort out their feelings. And if they do decide to love each other in that way try to accept that, for their love will enrich your life. Trust me on this.”

 

Elladan nodded. “When I told Elrohir about my suspicions, he dismissed them.”

 

“Elrohir hasn’t been around them much yet. Don’t fret about this, Elladan. I am certain everything will work out.”

 

Now that he had unburdened his heart, Elladan smiled at Erestor, deciding a change of subject was necessary. “And how do *you* fare, Erestor? I see you are already a bit more mobile? How is your coordination?”

 

“Poorly lacking,” said Erestor, frustrated, “but I am recovering.”

 

Unable to ignore his instincts, Elladan moved onto the side of the bed and helped Erestor to lean against him so he could examine the healing injury and the bruise that had formed on the back of the elder Elf’s head. “The swelling is going down. It is hard to believe, but the bruise was significantly larger when I first examined you.” Reassured that his charge was recovering satisfactorily, he lowered Erestor back into his comfortable pile of pillows. “And is Glorfindel still behaving?” Seeing a fierce blush on Erestor’s face surprised him and made him frown in puzzlement. “Erestor?”

 

“He is behaving.” Aiya, how was he going to tackle this one? Maybe it was best to remain quiet for now.

 

“Why are you blushing?” Throwing caution to the wind, Elladan spoke his mind. “I did notice the two of you were getting along better since ‘the incident’. Are you by any chance becoming friends?”

 

/Aiya, so much more than friends./ At least, Erestor hoped it was more than friendship. Well, Glorfindel had admitted to having feelings for him when Elrond had visited!

 

Elladan realized he had to stop asking questions, as he clearly saw Erestor’s discomfort. Something had changed between the two elder Elves – his former tutors. “Erestor, would you like to sit outside and breathe in the fresh air? You cannot be comfortable, being cooped up in here.”

 

“I would like to venture outside,” admitted Erestor slowly. “But I cannot walk unaided yet. I tried, but failed.”

 

“I can carry you to the great balcony… You know, the one where Ada likes to sit and read.”

 

Erestor gave Elladan a look filled with doubt. “I already hated the fact that Glorfindel had to carry me back to my quarters.”

 

“But think of the reward! You will sit in the sun and have your peace and quiet!” Elladan looked at Erestor hopefully. “Let me do this for you!”

 

Erestor – who had always found it hard to deny any of the twins – nodded eventually, giving his consent. “I will agree, as long as you don’t tell Glorfindel I had to be carried.”

 

“My lips are sealed,” promised Elladan smugly.

 

Beta read by Sulien.

All remaining mistakes are mine.

 

Second Chances

Part 9

 

 

Erestor sighed, realizing he should have known better than to agree to Elladan’s plan. When they arrived on the balcony, Elros and Elrond were already there, sitting close to one another on a comfortable bench. “We are interrupting, pen-neth.”

 

But Elrond had overheard Erestor’s remark and waved it aside. “Nonsense! There is enough space for one more! Elladan, pull up that chair for Erestor to sit on.” He was delighted at seeing Erestor here – and recovering. However, he did wonder why Elladan was avoiding his gaze.

 

Elros tugged at his sleeve and Elrond immediately concentrated on his recovering twin. “Is something wrong, gweniaur?”

 

“Why don’t you invite Elladan to stay as well? I have the feeling that something is on his mind.” Elros, always observant – even when wounded – had quickly realized something was troubling the younger half-Elf.

 

Elladan gave Elros a startled look, but nodded once, indicating he had heard. After gently putting Erestor down on the comfortable chair to Elrond’s right, he pulled up another and sat down opposite the elder twins. Although he had seen his father and Elros sit this close before, his senses now picked up on the new, even more intense bond between the elder half-Elves. Lowering his gaze, it locked on their hands, which were tightly clasped. Any doubts he might have now vanished. It was obvious the elder twins were attracted to each other ‘in that way’ and he recalled Erestor’s advice and took it to heart. He would find a way to accept this.

 

“Elladan, I must confess I am eager to spend more time with you so I can get to know you – and your siblings,” admitted Elros calmly. “Maybe you would like to keep us company for the rest of the day?”

 

“I wish I could accept your offer,” said Elladan honestly, “But now that my father is attending to you, they need me in the Healing House. However, I would be more than happy to join you for dinner.” He meant every word he had just said. After talking to Erestor, he had managed to get his priorities straight and his most important one was to make sure his father was happy again.

 

Elladan’s expression changed, and the friendly look instantly reassured Elros, who had been worried. Elros let go of his worries, becoming increasingly confident that he had found his place here – at Elrond’s side.

 

Erestor had watched the scene in silence and now exchanged a knowing look with Elrond. A pleased smile surfaced on the half-Elf’s face, and he returned it. Everything was right for once.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Glorfindel’s eyes never left Erestor’s body, as he lowered the dark-haired Elf into the pool, which had been filled with warm water and sweetly scented oils. He had spent a hard day on the road, trying to make up for yesterday’s slip. He had also located the sentry responsible for letting the Warg cross their borders and he had reminded him how important it was that they remained alert.

 

Upon his return to Erestor’s rooms, he had found Lindir keeping the dark-haired advisor company, but the white-haired Elf had quickly excused himself, seeing he had returned. They had talked for some time, Glorfindel updating Erestor on today’s events and in the end, he had felt tired to the bone. Dust and dirt had found its way into his hair and clothing, and he had desperately wanted to take a hot bath. When he had suggested he retire to his room to take that bath, Erestor had shyly suggested they could take one together, completely taking him aback and simultaneously delighting him.

 

And here they were, letting the warm water caress their bodies. After washing off the grime of his face and wetting his mane in the water, he looked at Erestor, realizing old sweat clung to the other Elf’s face and body. The usually shiny hair seemed a bit dull.

 

“Let me wash your hair, love?” Glorfindel looked in amazement at Erestor’s slow and sensual movements as the dark-haired Elf rested his back against the side of the pool. Why had he never noticed the exquisite beauty to those sharp features or the luxurious feel of the long dark hair that now slipped through his fingers? The look that Erestor gave him was a bit shy, but the dark-haired Elf’s body sent out a completely different message, and for one moment he wondered if Erestor had had male lovers before. He should ask, so he knew how experienced – or inexperienced – his new lover was, but this wasn’t the time or the place for that.

 

Erestor nodded his head once and then turned away from him, offering him a splendid view of his long back and narrow hips disappearing beneath the water. Glorfindel reached for the soap and worked up lather, thoughtfully spreading the soft crème through the raven tresses. “My, this feels soft, like spun gold.”

 

“My hair is black,” said Erestor, slightly amused at hearing the awe in Glorfindel’s voice.

 

“Yes, it is as dark as the night, but it feels incredible, running my fingers through it.” The look that Erestor gave him from over his shoulder was filled with liquid lust and desire, and he moaned softly, overcome by the need to feel Erestor close – to know the raven-haired beauty was his. How could he ever have rejected him in the past? “Erestor?” Reaching out for his new lover, he carefully turned him around and then pulled him closer until the dark-haired Elf was straddling his hips. “I never realized before how much sex you exude, my love. Why have you been hiding this?”

 

Erestor felt it too. There was magic at work here, heating the blood in his veins until he felt on fire. Rubbing his lower body against Glorfindel’s groin, he grew quickly aroused and giving in to his desires, his lips claimed his lover’s in a brutal and bruising kiss.

 

Glorfindel involuntarily arched his back, thrusting upward. He was hard and ready, but still a distant part of his mind wondered if they weren’t moving too fast. But then one of Erestor’s hands grabbed the back of his neck, pulling him closer. He was powerless to stop himself, as he continued to thrust against Erestor, wishing his beloved would take pity on him. He hadn’t joked when he had remarked that Erestor loved being on top and at that moment he realized how it was going to be between them. Erestor’s passion fueled his own, making him even harder.

 

He folded one arm around the other’s Elf’s waist and with his hand he aligned their erections. “Do as you want with me.” Erestor’s eyes were alight with dark fire and he thought he even saw golden specks in them. Their actions came natural to them and when Erestor finally began to thrust against him, Glorfindel surrendered.

 

Acting and not thinking at all, Erestor grabbed a fistful of golden hair, moving instinctively against Glorfindel, eager to bring them both to orgasm. His chocolate brown eyes connected with azure ones and he read the truth in them; Glorfindel was finally his! Releasing a possessive growl, he deepened their kiss, still holding Glorfindel in place, using the hold he had on the blond’s hair. Briefly, he wished Glorfindel was inside him and he would be truly riding his lover, but he also realized they needed more time until they could take that final step.

 

Approaching climax, Erestor released another passionate growl, licked his lover’s throat in an upward motion and then nipped at the sensitive skin beneath Glorfindel’s ear. He barely managed to keep himself from burying his teeth in the soft skin, but he held back at the last moment, unwilling to cause his lover pain.

 

Glorfindel suddenly trembled beneath him, and looking at the dilated pupils, he realized the Elda had found release. Eagerly claiming Glorfindel’s lips again, he rubbed himself against his lover, finally reaching orgasm himself.

 

Glorfindel looked in amazement at this sensual being in his arms. For one moment Erestor resembled a fierce creature, something ancient and primitive, as wild as the wind and yet as loving as a soft summer breeze, caressing the soft petals of a rose. “You are…” Words escaped him and he held on tight when the raven-haired Elf sagged against him.

 

Maybe they shouldn’t have done this yet. Erestor was still recovering from his injury and needed to rest. Instead they ended up making out in the pool, driving each other out of their minds. /Who could have guessed a red-hot flame burns beneath his ice?/

 

Panting softly, Erestor looked up at his lover, his head still resting on the blond’s shoulder. “That was…”

 

Glorfindel chuckled softly. “I never guessed you were this passionate!” Rubbing Erestor’s back, he felt his lover tremble. The glow in those chocolate brown eyes took him aback. Had he ever seen anything this beautiful before? This magical?

 

“Why are you looking at me like that?” Erestor studied Glorfindel’s eyes, but failed to identify the expression in them. His lover suddenly pulled him even closer, and Glorfindel determinedly claimed his lips in another passionate kiss.

 

Glorfindel had to release him when they both grew breathless. “Because you are beautiful. I was blind not see the real you before.” Ah, he was certain now. “I am madly in love with you.”

 

Erestor smiled brilliantly and kissed the tip of Glorfindel’s nose. “That is excellent, as I am madly in love with you too.”

 

/Ah, that is what I am seeing and sensing. Your love. Erestor, why did I waste these last millennia not seeing it?/ It was love that made Erestor radiant in his eyes, surrounding the raven-haired Elf with a soft, golden glow. The love had always been there, he just hadn’t bothered to look. “Will you allow me to propose marriage to you?”

 

Erestor’s eyes widened. He had expected Glorfindel to say many things, but not that! “Did you really say…” Staring at Glorfindel, the strangest sensation exploded in his stomach. It felt as if butterflies’ wings were tickling his insides. “Did you…”

 

“’Tis rather obvious where we are headed, isn’t it? Erestor, will you marry me?” Glorfindel ran his hands up Erestor’s long back, holding him tight.

 

“I…” This was what he had always wanted. To know Glorfindel was his – just his. “Yes, I will marry you!” Erestor enthusiastically nodded his head and gave Glorfindel the most gorgeous smile the blond had ever seen. “I always wanted you and now I finally have you! I never thought this day would ever come!”

 

“Believe it, love. Please believe it.” Guiding Erestor’s head back onto his shoulder, he held on tight, vowing to never betray Erestor’s trust and to always love him.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Epilogue

 

A few weeks later.

 

 

“Elrond?” Elros looked dotingly at his twin, pulling him close now that Elrond was waking up. It had taken Elros some weeks to fully recover from the Warg’s attack, but now he was as strong as he had been the very day Manwe had returned him to Arda.

 

“Yes, gweniaur?” Elrond opened his eyes and stared into his twin’s. During these last few weeks they had limited their intimacy to kissing and touching, just as they had agreed they would. Slowly though, he was beginning to understand and accept that Elros would be at this side for the rest of his life, and that realization had caused a new calm in his mind, which showed in his eyes and tone.

 

Elros had noticed his twin’s calmer demeanor as well. It told him that Elrond was growing beyond his insecurity and fear of loss, and maybe it was time to move on. “Do you have any work to do today? Or can you leave today’s matters in Erestor’s capable hands?” The dark-haired advisor had recovered due to Glorfindel’s constant care and attention and was now back at work, much to Elros’ delight, because now he could spend more time with his brother.

 

“I think that Erestor can handle all urgent matters,” said Elrond slowly, wondering about the purposeful expression in his twin’s eyes. “And what about you? Do you have any plans for today?”

 

Elros cocked his head and rolled onto his side, face to face with his twin. Elrond lay on his back, arms tucked beneath his head, and his naked body called to him, almost begging to be touched. Did Elrond still want to take this step?

 

“What are you thinking about, gwenneth?” Elrond now rolled onto his side as well, and draped one arm across his twin’s narrow hip. As they were both naked, his fingertips easily roamed the silk and subtle skin.

 

“When I returned to you, you mentioned being attracted to me. We never discussed this matter since then. Maybe now the time has come to properly address it?” Elros involuntarily held his breath.

 

“I remember ravishing your mouth and nearly claiming you in my frenzied passion, but you told me to slow down.” Elrond smiled, beginning to understand where this conversation was heading. His fingertips encountered the scar that had formed on his twin’s side and chest, privately cursing the Warg for attacking him. The teeth had left marks, which had turned into pale scars, marring Elros’ flesh. Not even his Elven healing skills could take away those reminders yet. They would slowly fade in time.

 

“What are your thoughts on us now, gwenneth?” Elros slowly raised a hand and rested it on Elrond’s hips, drawing circles on his twin’s flesh. “Do you still want me in that way?”

 

Elrond took his time to carefully ponder the question. Although his answer was already clear to him, he wanted to phrase it correctly. “I still want you in that way. During these last few weeks my love for you has deepened, though I thought that impossible. I can no longer imagine a life without you. When I look at you, I want to touch my lips to yours, and when I feel your skin beneath my fingertips – like now – I want to explore further, but you asked me not to.”

 

“And you respected my request, for which I am grateful. Tell me, are you now convinced that I am here to stay? That I won’t leave you?” Elros had watched his twin closely these last few weeks and had seen Elrond’s confidence and trust grow steadily. It encouraged him to address this now.

 

“Deep down in my heart I know that you will stay with me. And in the end, we will sail for Valinor together, but for now, I want to stay here and love you.” Growing bolder, Elrond’s hand slid down Elros’ bottom, squeezing a firm buttock. “I have wanted to do this since you returned.”

 

Elros smiled, amused. “But gwenneth, once we take this step there is no way back. Are you really sure you want to do this? I would never forgive myself if I found out that you did this out of guilt. I do want you, and I want to take this next step, but only…” Elros was perfectly silenced when his twin’s lips descended onto his for a sweet kiss. “Oh, lirimaer, I do hope you really want this.”

 

“I do…” Elrond’s voice trailed off, kissing Elros, deepening their kiss and sliding his tongue along the inside of his twin’s lips. Elros tasted like a soft summer breeze, with the first hints of an autumn storm floating on the wind. “Oh, so sweet, and so willing…”

 

“Needy,” whispered Elros when his twin briefly broke their kiss. Only now did he realize that Elrond’s hand had slid down his buttocks and that probing fingertips were rubbing up and down his cleft. “Is that what you want?”

 

“Yes, I want you, gweniaur. I should have realized that much earlier, but I clung to the notion that our love was wrong.” Elrond slipped his other arm around his twin’s waist and slowly rolled him onto his back, straddling Elros’ hips and bowing down to lick his way down his twin’s chest. Elros arched his back beneath him, and an already hard nipple easily slid between his lips. Following ancients instincts, he suckled gently and then flicked the tip of his tongue over the erect nub. Elros was squirming beneath him, his need obvious as his twin’s erection rubbed against his abdomen. “And what about you? Is this what you need?”

 

“I want to feel you inside me,” admitted Elros in a hoarse tone. Blinking, he searched his twin’s eyes and then nervously cleared his throat. “Have you done this before?” The moment the words had left his lips he realized that Elrond had. “Ereinion.”

 

“Yes, but with him I was on the receiving end mostly. I have seldom been on top.” Elrond stared at his twin with obvious fascination. “How did I ever manage without you? Where did I find the strength to carry on after you died?”

 

“Please don’t mention my death when we are about to make love.” Elros raised his hand and ran fingers through his twin’s loose mane. Looking into calm gray eyes, he recalled the agony of his death. Dying itself hadn’t been hard, but the knowledge that he was leaving behind Elrond had nearly devastated him. Although he was only minutes older, he had always felt his twin’s protector. He would have loved to see Elrond marry and for his twin’s children to be born, but old age had finally caught up with him.

 

Seeing the misery in his twin’s eyes, Elrond knew he had put it there by mentioning his brother’s death. “Forgive me, it was never my intention to cause you pain. Let me take those memories away.” Elrond gently claimed his twin’s lips, whilst his hands explored Elros’ body. Hearing Elros moan, he realized that he already knew every inch of his twin’s body, because he knew his own so well. Bestowing gentle caresses to the insides of his twin’s thighs, he smiled as Elros eagerly parted them. Sliding between them, he continued the kissing, eventually dragging the tip of his tongue down Elros’ chest. When he finally encountered his twin’s hardened flesh, he sighed appreciatively. “My…”

 

Elros smiled, slightly embarrassed at being this eager and needy. His erection stood proud and tiny beads of pre-ejaculate dripped down the shaft, glistering against the skin. “Elrond?”

 

“Hush, don’t talk.” Elrond gave his twin a reassuring smile before bestowing a lick on the tip of Elros’ erection. The caress seemed to resonate in his own body, his groin tightening. Resting his hands on his twin’s hips, he took in more of Elros’ hard flesh, licking up and down the length, teasingly blowing at the weeping head.


”Ai…” Moaning in his need, Elros tried to thrust upward, but Elrond cunningly restrained him. “What are you doing to me?”

 

Elrond looked up, licking his lips. “I am making you mine.” He would never admit it, but he had hoped this would happen one of these days and he had hidden a phial filled with exquisite oil beneath their pillows. Uncovering it now, he gave Elros a wicked grin. “I will prepare you properly. There will only be pleasure when our bodies finally unite.”

 

Elros put his trust in his twin, letting Elrond take the lead. “I do love you, gwenneth…” He paused to gather his thoughts and then added, “You have no idea for how many nights I dreamt this would happen. That you would want me in turn.” Resting one hand at the nape of Elrond’s neck, he gently massaged the area. His other hand rested against his twin’s chest, rolling a hard nipple between his fingers. “Though I must admit I pictured myself taking you.”

 

“Oh, we can reverse roles whenever you want,” said Elrond confidently. He had managed to remove the stopper and now poured a large amount of oil onto his fingertips. “Do you think we will feel differently after making love?” Carefully he placed one finger at the guardian ring to the entrance of his twin’s body, gently massaging.

 

Elros began to purr softly, amazed at how good that caress felt. He had made love to his wife in his first life, but that intimacy didn’t compare to what he was experiencing now with Elrond. “Maybe? Why don’t we find out?” He yelped softly as one digit easily slid inside his passage. Now there was a novel experience for him! He had expected it to feel awkward, maybe even uncomfortable, but instead he felt himself push down on the finger. His body was reacting instinctively now that it liked the sensation.

 

“I don’t want to rush this, gweniaur. Our first time should be special.” It sounded like a cliché, but it was the way he felt. He wanted their first time to be unforgettable. Slipping another finger into the loosening passage, he moved them inside the channel, preparing Elros for their lovemaking. “Now, let me see…” His fingertips probed inside the velvet glove, and he carefully monitored Elros’ reactions, for they would tell him when he had located that hidden pleasure gland.

 

Elros’ eyes widened. “Ai, what? Oh…” He involuntarily raised his hips when sweet ecstasy spread throughout his groin. “What is… that? Oh…” Panting softly, he instinctively pushed back, already establishing a rhythm. “Oh, lirimaer!”

 

Grinning like a big, predatory cat, Elrond’s fingertips brushed the gland again. He wanted Elros as comfortable and relaxed as possible before entering him. But that thought also presented him with a question. What position to take Elros in? His twin would doubtlessly want eye contact, so they had to do this face to face. Removing his fingers, he quickly soothed a distressed Elros with a deep kiss. At the same time, he lifted his twin’s hips, sliding a pillow beneath them.

 

Elros was on the brink of climax, but now that Elrond had stopped he was hanging on the edge. “Please, gwenneth. I have waited for so long!”

 

Elrond nodded his head once. “Soon.” Rubbing more oil onto his erection, he slid his hand beneath Elros’ knees, supporting his twin’s legs. He positioned himself at Elros’ entrance and slowly began to enter him.

 

The formerly calm eyes now burst with passion and need, finally feeling Elrond claim him. “At last.” Elros was so lost in his passion, so overwhelmed that this was finally happening, that he didn’t even register the discomfort that came with the invasion. Longingly staring at his twin, he sucked in his breath when Elrond had completely sheathed himself. “Oh, Elrond!”

 

Elrond licked his lips, and then grew motionless, giving his twin a chance to grow used to the invasion. “I already feel different,” he whispered thoughtfully. “I no longer feel so alone.”

 

Elros nodded in understanding, feeling it too. “I need you closer. I need more of you.”

 

After lowering Elros’ legs gently onto the bed, he wrapped his arms around his twin’s waist, pulling his twin into a sitting position, Elrond moved until he sat on the mattress, his back resting against the headboard. 

 

Elros’ eyes had widened again, suddenly finding himself straddling Elrond’s lap. In this position he felt his twin even more clearly inside him, and he reacted by possessively claiming Elrond’s already bruised lips and folding his arms and legs around his twin’s waist. “Oh, this is divine!” Resting his brow against Elrond’s shoulder, he waited for his brother to take the lead again. When the first thrust came, he moaned with pleasure and threw back his head in surrender.

 

“You are beautiful, meleth-nîn,” whispered Elrond, awed at the passion and love displayed on his twin’s face. Carefully thrusting into the welcoming body, he slipped his hands beneath his twin’s buttocks, supporting him. Guiding Elros’ head back onto his shoulder, he then wrapped one arm possessively around his twin’s waist, while the other supported and kneaded the firm buttocks. It amazed him that Elros hadn’t come yet, and he hoped his twin would last long enough for them to reach orgasm together. Suddenly, sharp teeth pierced his skin. Elros was biting the skin beneath his ear, making him moan deliriously. “I… am sorry… cannot hold… back!” Elrond had hoped to draw this out longer, but his need to find release was too strong.

 

Elros released his twin’s skin, which had been locked between his teeth, and groaned loudly, as Elrond’s orgasm exploded in his mind, pulling him along. Warm cream splashed against his twin’s abdomen and Elros trembled with passion and release. “So long! It took us so long!” But in the end, Elrond had found the courage to take this step. Sweating lightly, he made eye contact with Elrond, though that wasn’t really necessary, as he sensed his twin clearly in his mind. Elrond had never felt this alive in his thoughts before.

 

Panting, Elrond smiled smugly. “Oh, that was… beyond words, gweniaur.” But deep down inside his heart, he also felt melancholy and a deep sense of regret. If only he had given Elros a chance when his twin had first kissed him!

 

“No regrets,” whispered Elros determinedly, “Please, no regrets. I made my choice and you made yours. You were rewarded with a beautiful wife and three lovely children. Don’t you dare regret that!” He whimpered softly when Elrond’s now sated member slid out of his body, leaving him feeling disconnected. “And I was rewarded in the end as well. Let us thank Manwe for allowing us to express our love.”

 

Elrond tightly wrapped his arms around his twin, pulling him close. He relished the feel of Elros’ head, as it came to rest on his shoulder again, and he soothingly rubbed large circles onto his twin’s back. “Do you think this is why you were sent back?”

 

“Maybe,” mumbled Elros against his twin’s shoulder. “Maybe we will find out in Valinor, maybe we won’t. Is finding out that important to you?”

 

“I do think Manwe allowed you to return because of our love.” Elrond fingered locks of his twin’s slightly damp hair, savoring their bodily contact. “I always loved you, Elros, and I always will.”

 

Elros smiled, rubbing his cheek against Elrond’s shoulder. “Thank you for allowing for this to happen, gwenneth.”

 

Tucking Elros’ head beneath his chin, Elrond held on, slowly rocking his twin. They had both received a second chance.

 

 

The End.

November 2003

 

Beta read by Sulien, thanks!

All remaining mistakes are mine.

 

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